Hola! More Than Just
by emmareden
Summary: Teacher/student fic, but with alot of other drama going on too. SwanQueen.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I've read a few AU's with the teacher/student Regina/Emma thing going on and I LOVE them, so I decided to take my own view on it (also slightly based on a platonic but close relationship I had with a teacher back in high school). So let me know what you think, and enjoy!**

**TW for mental health issues/self harm.**

Emma groaned as she rolled out of bed for the first day of her final year of high school. One more year, she thought, trying to motivate herself. She failed and snoozed for another hour, it was like new years eve right; spend the night how you're going to spend the rest of the year? Her teachers would soon get used to her being late.

Besides, it was obvious all of her teachers had got _the email, _the one her coordinators sent out at the beginning of every semester; basically, an email to let all of her teachers know that Emma was an "at-risk" student on the edge of failing out, she had an attitude problem but try not to be too hard on her because she has a troubled background and even though she struggled with motivation, she _was_ actually a bright student.

"Em, slow down," her friend Belle ran to catch up with her, "Hey," she replied a little breathlessly, giving her friend a quick hug, "How was the summer? Didn't see you much, is everything okay?"

Emma shrugged, "Sure, just tired, same old, same old," she replied dismissively, "What about you?"

"It was good," Belle nodded, "I volunteered at the library, so that was fun."

Emma chuckled; her friend had an interesting idea of fun, "Whatever floats your boat," she teased gently, bumping her shoulder into her friend.

Belle smiled shyly, "I haven't seen Ruby yet," she frowned, "Have you?"

Emma shrugged again, "Nah, I haven't. What have you got now, anyway?"

"Literature," Belle looked at her timetable, "In 302, where are you?"

Emma looked at her timetable, "Spanish," she groaned, "101, but it's okay, I'll walk you."

Belle rolled her eyes, "It's the other end of the school, Em. You're going to be late."

Emma pouted, "I haven't seen you all Summer and now you're trying to get rid of me?"

Another eye roll, "Course not, but don't pretend you're walking me to class because you want to spend time with me, you're just avoiding class."

Emma didn't deny it as she walked along with her friend, "I do miss talking to you, you know," she said so quietly Belle hardly heard her as they turned into the corridor which held her classroom.

Belle stopped outside the door, "You can talk to me anytime, Em. You know that," she replied softly, putting a hand on her friend's shoulder, "I better go," she looked into the classroom as it filled up, "You should come to lunch with us, I'll text Ruby, meet us in café?"

Emma nodded non-committedly, "Okay, have fun."

"You too," Belle smiled.

Emma turned around and rolled her eyes; fun, right. Belle was super nice and easy to talk to, but Emma would never understand her intense love of books. Every time she saw Belle, she had her head buried in a new book, but hey, each to their own.

She strolled slowly to her classroom, yawning as she did and stopping in at the bathroom and to get a drink from a vending machine before she finally turned into the right corridor. She sighed, looking at her watch, she'd only killed seven minutes and slammed her back against a row of lockers, closing her eyes for a moment and doing one of her breathing exercises before she knew she'd stalled for long enough and approached the classroom opening the door.

"And I expect you to," the brunette teacher turned as the door opened, as did most of the class, "Yes, can I help you? Are you in this class?"

Emma nodded, "Yeah, sorry," she shrugged.

The teacher looked at her watch, "You're ten minutes late, do you have a reason?"

Emma shrugged, "I didn't hear the bell?"

"Is that an excuse or a question?" the teacher rose an eyebrow before sighing, "Take a seat, what's your name?" she asked as she picked up the roll.

"Emma Swan," the blonde replied as she found a seat at the back.

"Right," her teacher ticked something off on the piece of paper, "In the future, your punctuality would be appreciated."

Emma nodded, though all she was thinking was _whatever, as if, haven't you heard my reputation?_ She sat down with her books in front of her and half-listened to the teacher. She found the teacher quite easy to look at, she must have been around thirty, her body was clearly in it's prime and when she turned to write something on the board, Emma had to admit that this teacher was not like most of the teachers in this school, that ass was damn fine but eventually Emma stopped staring and looked around the class instead.

Same old people as every year. They already had an opinion of her and that was hardly going to change. She hated the way people would say at the start of the new year that you could have a new start. In high school, a new start didn't exist unless you actually changed school's. Kids were kids and Emma would always be the kid who had tried to take her own life in junior school. Kids never forgot that kind of thing and Emma was pretty used to the stigma.

The bell rung shrilly and Emma snapped to attention picking up her books and heading out.

"Miss Swan, a minute please?" the teacher, Miss Regina Mills, she had read on the whiteboard, called to her as she tried to make her escape.

Emma walked back to her teachers desk, dragging her feet and stood in front of her.

"I understand you get some slack cut for personal reasons," Miss Mills arched an eyebrow again as though looking for confirmation.

"I don't ask for that," Emma said; it was true, she never wanted to stand out, to be this kid that all the teachers felt sorry for.

Miss Mills pursed her lips, "Well, I would like you to make an effort to be on time for this class, I take lateness as a form of disrespect. I am here on time for you and I would appreciate the same in return."

Emma nodded, "Okay," she simply said, "May I go?"

Miss Mills sighed, "If you do need any extra help with this class, please let me know. I don't like to fail any student, Miss Swan and I believe that with a little effort, all my students are capable of passing," she smiled.

Emma frowned; teachers were never this nice, most of them liked to pretend she didn't exist, it was easier she supposed, "Okay, well thanks."

The teacher nodded and dismissed her student. She sighed; she'd seen too many students with emotional issues be failed by the system. People, teachers and students alike, liked to skip around anyone who was a little different, probably because they thought they didn't know how to talk to them, but they didn't realise that only made the person feel more isolated and unmotivated.

Regina didn't count herself as any kind of expert or anything, but she did know enough to know nobody liked to be completely ignored. It made them feel forgotten.

Emma spotted her friends at a table in the café and headed over to them, settling into her seat.

"Hey Em, how was the break?" Ruby asked perkily.

"Alright," Emma nodded as she slowly unwrapped her sandwich.

"Mine was fine too, thanks for asking," Ruby said pointedly, trying to look her friend in the eye.

Emma looked up at her, "Sorry," she muttered.

"Everything alright, Swan?" Belle asked, using her pet name for her best friend.

"Uh-huh," Emma nodded, staring at her uneaten sandwich in front of her.

"You not hungry?" Belle asked gently.

"Not really," Emma muttered, "It's this stupid medication," she shrugged.

Belle frowned, "Did they put you on a new one?"

Emma nodded, "Yep. Just another stupid test," she shrugged, taking a sip of water, "Anyway, how are your classes going?"

Belle and Ruby exchanged a quick glance, but knew better than to push their friend; besides, she was more likely to talk to Belle alone anyway.

"Boring as hell," Ruby shrugged, "But hey, one more year, right?"

"Well, mine have been really great. In literature we're studying The Catcher In The Rye, which is – "

"Your favourite book of all time, right?" Emma smiled, "You read it all the time. That's cool."

"Yeah, it is. I can't wait. Then after that, we do some poetry and then mythology and fairy tales and of course, Shakespeare. I think it will be my favourite class," Belle said enthusiastically.

"Hang on, literature?" Ruby feigned shock, "You like books, Belle? I never would have guessed!" she laughed.

Belle blushed as she chuckled, "Shut up, Rubes. What about you, Em? How'd Spanish go?"

"You're doing Spanish?" Ruby asked, rolling her eyes, "What a surprise."

Emma frowned, "What do you mean?"

"You're always dragging us to those latino festivals and movies," Ruby teased, "We know you're just looking for some cute girl who can whisper Spanish in your ear."

"Piss off," Emma threw back with a smile on her face, "Anyway, none of the girls in my class are even cute, so it's a total waste."

"Really? None of them?" Belle asked.

"Well, the teacher's pretty hot," Emma said, a sly smile taking over her lips, "But somehow, I don't think that's gonna happen."

Ruby barked out a laugh whilst Belle chuckled beside her.

"Damn, who have you got? That Miss Mill's' chick?" Ruby asked.

"Yep," Emma replied, finally taking a bite of her sandwich, "She's pretty fine, right?" she smirked.

Ruby's face broke out in a grin, "Totally fine. Hook in, woman."

Emma shook her head laughing, "Shut up."

Ruby stood up, "I better head off, I've got math over the other side, I'll catch you ladies later," she winked and bounced off.

"Hey, Em, can I tell you something?" Belle started to shift in her seat nervously.

Emma tilted her head, frowning, "Of course you can."

Belle bit her lip and felt the heat reach her cheek, "I think I like someone," she said, looking down at her hands.

Emma smiled, "Really?" she asked; Belle had never had a serious relationship, and she hardly ever got crushes, not on real people anyway, "Who? Someone you know?"

Belle nodded, "Yeah, someone we both know," she tried to hint.

Emma thought for a moment, "Is it Ruby?" she guessed.

Belle blushed further, "I think so," she said quietly, before she looked up at her friend, "Is this weird for me to talk about with you…you know, after…"

"No," Emma shook her head, "It's cool, Belle. That was last year," she shrugged, "And I wasn't ready. I'm not ready," she shook her head again, "Are you gonna tell her?"

Belle shrugged as the bell rang, "I don't know. I'm not really her type, she wouldn't want to be with someone…like me."

Emma pushed her hair out of her face as she stood up, looking Belle in the eye and laying a hand on her friends, "Belle, anyone would be lucky to have you. You're amazing, you're beautiful and intelligent, you're funny and witty, you're super cute, you – "

"Em," Belle interrupted, sighing as the two walked to the only class they had together.

Emma blushed, "I'm sorry," she grimaced, "I just mean she'd be lucky to have a girl like you. You should ask her out."

Belle bit her lip again, "Wouldn't it make things weird?"

Emma shrugged as they walked into the classroom, "No, it doesn't have to. I want you to be happy, Belle," she took a deep breath, "I really think you should ask her out."

Belle smiled, "Okay, maybe I will."

"Miss Swan, just in time," Miss Mills allowed the blonde teenager to enter just before she closed the door, "Today, I will hand back your tests. Most of you did well, some of you have room for improvement."

As the attractive Spanish teacher handed out the tests, Emma knew which category she would fall into, and no surprises, when she received her test it had a big red F on it, causing Emma to curse under her breath, which unfortunately earned her a quirked eyebrow from Miss Mills.

It had only been a few weeks and she was already behind in every class. Maybe she _should _just drop out, she thought, she was never going to pass. She sucked at languages, why did she even pick Spanish? Internally, she rolled her eyes, her friends were right, she had thought if she had to suffer another year at school, she at least wanted to hear some sexy chick speaking Spanish for an hour a day. Maybe she could still transfer to an easier class.

The bell finally rung, and Emma hadn't heard a single thing the teacher had said until she stood up.

"A word, please Miss Swan," Miss Mills must be getting used to uttering that sentence, Emma thought.

"I know I failed the test," Emma shrugged, "I'm sorry."

"Did you study?" Miss Mills asked, turning to the blonde as she finished cleaning the whiteboard.

"I…I tried," Emma stuttered, looking at the ground and shifting on her feet.

Miss Mills frowned, "Tried? Do you have somewhere quiet to study at home?"

Emma nodded, "Yeah, home's quiet," she replied.

"And free of distraction?" the teacher asked.

Emma looked at her and frowned, shrugging, "Nowhere's free of distraction."

Miss Mills sighed, "Why can't you study?" she tried the direct approach.

Emma frowned, "I don't know. It's just hard to concentrate. Didn't you get the email?"

"Email?" Miss Mills asked quizzically.

"Yeah, the one that says I'm crazy and pretend I don't exist, it's easier on everyone. Troubled kids are just a weigh down on the system and – " Emma didn't even know when she got so frustrated but all of a sudden she was talking and couldn't stop until Miss Mills put her hands firmly on her shoulders.

"Emma, hey, stop," she said gently, "Firstly, that's not what the email says and yes I got it, but it's very generic. I think you're a bright young woman and I don't want to see the school system fail you because we don't have the resources to support you."

Emma was looking at her teacher wide-eyed; nobody, especially no teacher, had ever shown any interest in genuinely helping her. It was then she knew she wasn't transferring to an easier class.

Miss Mills seemed to see this in the young girl's face, "If you let me, I'd like to help you. We have another test in two weeks, if you'd like I could help you study."

Emma blinked, thinking for a few moments, "I wouldn't want to waste your time."

"Emma, I wouldn't offer if I didn't want to help. So, how about after school at say, 4?"

Emma hesitated again, "Okay. Um, thanks, Miss Mills."

Regina smiled and nodded, "I'll see you then."

"Yo, Em, where were you?" Ruby said when Emma finally rocked up to lunch.

"Held back after Spanish," Emma said as she slid into her seat.

Ruby's eyebrows shot up as she leaned in, "By the hottie? You in trouble again, Em?"

Belle looked more concerned.

"No, I'm not. I mean, I failed this stupid test, but Miss Mills says she's gonna help me study after school for the next one," Emma took a sip of her drink, as she took in Ruby's arm slung casually around her best friend.

It shouldn't have bothered her and it wasn't that she still had those kind of feelings for Belle, she was more like a little sister Emma wanted to protect. Plus she wasn't convinced that Belle didn't still hold those feelings for _her, _even after Emma rejected her the previous year.

"Yum," Ruby licked her lips and laughed.

Belle rolled her eyes, "If you want, you know I can help you with English…or math, or – "

"Pretty much anything, but Spanish, right?" Ruby laughed, pecking her girlfriend on the cheek.

Belle shrugged, "Yeah."

"That didn't go so well last year, Belle," Emma reminisced; and it hadn't, Emma knew it was her fault. She was the worst student, she'd literally fallen asleep when Belle was talking or she snapped at her, in fact, she may have thrown her chair across the room once or twice, it had definitely been a strain on their friendship.

Belle smiled, "I know, but that doesn't mean we can't try again."

"You shouldn't have to put up with me when I get…like that," Emma shrugged.

Belle just kept on smiling, "The offers there if you want it," she finished smartly, "I'm going to get seconds, lasagne yum!" she stood up and made her way through the café.

Ruby yawned, "So you still got feelings for Belle or what?" she asked casually.

Emma was surprised, "You serious, right now? No, I don't. She's my best friend, she's basically my family, Ruby, you know that."

Ruby shrugged, "Just checking," she smirked, "You're a hard chick to read, you know."

"I told her to ask you out, you idiot," Emma snapped, before running a hand through her hair.

Ruby put up her hands in defence, "Whoa, alright, just a question, Em, calm."

"Break her heart and I'll kill you," Emma retorted, setting her friend with a heavy glare.

"Em," Ruby repeated, "Just calm down, it was just a question."

Belle came back and noticed the tension, "What's going on?" she asked slowly, looking from one girl to the other.

"Nothing," Emma muttered, "I'm gonna go, I'll see you later," she picked up her tray and chucked in the bin, but Belle chased after her, grabbing her arm.

"Hey, you alright?" Belle asked, worry written all over her face.

"I'm fine," Emma said stubbornly as she turned away.

Belle grabbed her a little harder this time, "Emma," she said firmly, "You've been off for weeks. You're up, you're down, you're pissed off… Are you off your meds?"

"I'm not off my stupid meds, Belle," Emma growled, "I'm just on new one's. Just a fucking pin cushion, as usual."

"Em," Belle said softly, "They'll get it right one day."

Emma scoffed, "I'll see you later, Belle."

Emma dragged her feet as she walked along to her Spanish teacher's classroom. She was exhausted, but the truth was Miss Mills was kind of cool and so, Emma had decided not to ditch their tutoring session.

"Hola," Miss Mills greeted her with a smile, removing her reading glasses, which looked damned cute, Emma thought.

Emma smiled back, "Hola," she repeated; truth be told, she hardly knew what Miss Mills was saying in class anymore because it was a mix of English and Spanish, but the language was damn sexy so she wished she did understand it.

"How was your day?" Miss Mills asked.

Emma yawned, "It was okay," as she took a seat on the other side of Miss Mills desk.

"Okay, so it seems like you really just failed the last test because you didn't study, right?"

Emma sighed, "Well, yeah, sort of."

"Sort of?" the teacher raised her eyebrows.

"I don't know, in class…I find it hard to concentrate, I guess, and then everything moved too fast and now you're always talking Spanish and I don't understand," Emma admitted.

Miss Mills nodded, "It probably doesn't help that you stare out the window for most of my class," she said but with a smile.

"Oh, do I? I mean, I'm sorry," Emma stared at the desk, "I'll try harder, Miss Mills."

"It's okay, dear. Let's just get you through this next test, okay?"

Emma nodded, "Okay," she shrugged, "I'm not very good at languages, though."

Miss Mills frowned, "Why did you pick this subject then?"

Emma blushed, "Well, I like listening to Spanish," she said stupidly, "And I like the latino culture and the girls are… I mean, yeah," she stopped herself, feeling like a total idiot.

The brunette looked amused though, "I see," she simply smiled, "Well, I have been speaking this language since I was born, so if I can't teach you, nobody can."

"Where are you from?" Emma could have kicked herself; she shouldn't ask a teacher personal questions, what was she thinking?

Miss Mills didn't seem to mind though, "Well, I was born here, but my parents are from Puerto Rico."

"Cool," Emma nodded, suddenly fascinated with the woman before her. This is stupid, she thought, I hardly know this woman, other than the fact that she's drop dead gorgeous and a better teacher than any other in this school. Don't fall for a teacher, Emma Swan told herself.

"Shall we get started?" Miss Mills balanced a pen on her bottom lip, and Emma pulled her gaze away reluctantly as she nodded in agreement.

"Okay, let's try again? Introduction?" Miss Mills prompted.

Emma stifled a yawn, "Hola. Me llamo Emma Swan," she hesitated, "Mi nombre es Emma Swan. Tengo dieciocho años de edad. Me gusta la música y la television," she bit her lip nervously, but at least confident she was doing okay because Miss Mills was nodding encouragingly "Yo vivo en Estados Unidos. Mi comida favorita es la quesadilla. Gusto en conocerlo."

Miss Mills beamed, "Perfect, Emma. Well done."

Emma blushed, "My accent is horrible, yours is perfect."

"Well, my mother doesn't speak English, so I grew up in a Spanish speaking home, remember? A slight advantage, but muchas gracias," she smiled as she looked at her watch.

"I should go," Emma preferred to check out before she was kicked out.

"I didn't realise it had gotten so late," Miss Mills frowned, "It's getting dark. Do you drive, dear?"

Emma shook her head, "No, I walk. It's not far away though."

Miss Mills frown deepened, "I can give you a lift, I don't like young people walking the streets in the dark."

"Oh," Emma shook her head, "Really, I walk around much later than this."

"Well, I wish you hadn't said that, Emma, you really shouldn't," Miss Mills had her teacher voice back on as she lectured the young woman.

Emma shrugged, "I've never ran into any trouble, I can take care of myself," the blonde did like to think she was tough, but all of a sudden that sounded stupid. She knew her 2am walks were a bad idea.

Miss Mills sighed, "You are not invincible, dear. Anyway, do your parents allow you to wander around late at night or are they unaware of this?"

Emma felt her body tense and she begun packing up her books, "I don't know my parents, Miss Mills. I thought everybody knew that."

Miss Mills expression softened, "I'm sorry, I didn't know. Who do you live with then?"

"Just myself," Emma replied.

"Oh," Miss Mills merely said as she stood up, packing up the last of her things, "I insist on driving you home, are you ready?"

Emma supressed her natural instinct to argue, finding she didn't really want to anyhow, "Yeah, sure. I'm ready."

They wandered out, talking sparingly as they reached the car park with only a few cars left. Regina clicked her car doors open.

"Whoa, that's your car?" Emma was impressed by the dark purple convertible, roof down that she found herself hopping into.

"Yes, dear. I take it, you approve?" Miss Mills smiled at Emma's reaction.

"It's cool," Emma nodded, "I can't wait to get my own car."

Miss Mills nodded, "It is freedom, I highly recommend it. Do you have your learners?" she asked as they left the car park.

"Yeah, I do, but I can't drive for a while," Emma responded, "This stupid medication I'm on can make me really drowsy so they say I shouldn't operate machinery," she sighed, frustration apparent.

"That is unfortunate," Miss Mills felt sympathetic towards her student, "Hopefully your body can get used to this medication and you will be able to drive soon."

Emma sighed, "I hope so, um it's left here."

Regina turned the car to the left, "Which street are you on, dear?"

"Nolan Street, just past Granny's diner," Emma replied.

"You are not very far from me at all, I have just moved in behind Granny's. If you ever need a lift, please let me know. I would prefer to give you a lift than have you walking around late at night," Regina offered.

Emma looked across at her teacher, smiling, "Well, thanks Miss Mills. I appreciate it. Just there," she pointed, "Yep, perfect. Thanks so much for the lift," she didn't often offer teachers smiles, especially not genuine smiles but she did to Miss Mills, "And thanks for helping me study, I do find it easier when I do it with someone…but I usually end up biting my best friends head off," she muttered the last bit, embarrassed.

"Any time, Emma. We will study again before next Friday's test. Now stop yawning and go and get some sleep, dear, goodnight," Regina gave a wave as Emma hopped out of her car.

There was something about this young woman, though Regina couldn't identify what it was exactly, that intrigued her. She wanted desperately to help Emma to pass not only her class, but the entire year. She didn't understand why the other teachers wouldn't offer her the same kind of help, all she needed was someone to believe in her.

Not to mention, the fact that she was alone, without parents, made Regina want to somehow protect Emma, she seemed to have nobody else to do that. Nobody should grow up without parents. It just seemed to her the young woman needed an adult figure in her life, a mentor of sorts, to remind her that she wasn't alone in a battle she thought she'd already lost.

Emma unlocked the front door and collapsed straight onto the couch, grabbing the television remote before she did. It was too early to sleep but her eyelids were heavy; _I'll just zone out for a while,_ she thought, ignoring doctor's instructions. She knew it wasn't healthy, this zoning out where her mind transported her to a dream-like world while awake, but it was better than sleeping and it felt safe there.

But tonight she saw a new face in that otherwise fictional world and that was the face of Miss Regina Mills. She was so sweet, her voice was beautiful, especially when she spoke in Spanish and she just seemed to care genuinely. Somehow the older woman had made her feel safe with a simple night of tutoring, something no adult had ever made Emma feel through every foster home she'd gone through.

Eventually she did fall to sleep with thoughts of Miss Mills but still, like most night's she wished she never had to wake up, but of course, she did.

Emma packed up her things slowly after Spanish class, waiting for the rest of the students to file out of the classroom. She bit her lip nervously as she watched her teacher clean off the whiteboard. Miss Mills seemed to detect someone watching her and turned around to see the blonde teenager quickly avert her gaze.

She smiled, "Emma? Can I do something for you?"

Emma shrugged, "No, I just…" she trailed off, staring at the ground.

The older woman frowned, "Is something wrong, dear?"

"It's this stupid test," Emma muttered, "I tried to study for it, but I couldn't and I know if I fail, it's basically impossible for me to pass."

Miss Mills offered a small smile, "Why don't you stop by after school, I can help you study."

Emma chewed on her lip, "I don't want to waste your time."

"I feel as though we've had this conversation, dear," Miss Mills chuckled quietly, "I'll see you at four, okay?"

'I have stupid detention," Emma mumbled.

Miss Mills quirked an eyebrow but replied, "Okay, four thirty then?"

Emma nodded as she swung her backpack over her shoulder, "Thanks, Miss Mills."

Regina watched the blonde leave the classroom with a little more pep in her step than usual and couldn't help chortling to herself. She'd helped Emma study a few times now, but the teenager always seemed so reluctant to ask for help, even though Miss Mills was willing to offer it. In fact, she wished more students would ask for her help, but it didn't seem to be the cool thing to do.

Emma _was _different from the other students Regina taught. She was reserved and a little lost. She always seemed skittish around the other students and had that look in her posture as though she was trying to be invisible, begging not to be noticed.

Regina couldn't help being reminded of another young woman who had been in her life, and she supposed that was what initially drew her to the blonde teenager, even though she knew she should be drawing boundaries, especially the way she caught Emma staring (trying and failing to be discreet) at her when her back was turned or her head was down.

Belle and Emma set their tray's down as they took their seats in the café. Almost instantly, Ruby appeared at Belle's side, giving her a hug from behind and kissing her neck.

"Hey," she stole a fry from her girlfriend's plate as she sat down.

Emma groaned internally, Ruby was always around these days. She loved her and everything but she missed talking to Belle. There was that little bit more a guard that went up when Ruby joined, and that was always, recently.

Emma yawned, watching her friend's cuddle and share food. She sighed and ate her food as quickly as she could so she could leave them to it.

"I'm off," she interrupted the love fest.

Belle frowned, "Okay, you coming by the diner for dinner?"

"Um, yeah sure. I've got detention…and then I'm studying with Miss Mills, so I might not be there until like six?"

"You're studying with the hottie again?"" Ruby bounced her eyebrows in jest, "She sure seems to have taken an interest in you, Em."

Emma rolled her eyes, "She just wants to make sure I pass her class, that's all."

Belle smiled, "Well, I think she seems nice," she said kindly, "and I'm glad she helps you study. See you at Granny's later."

Emma nodded, "Yeah, see you then."

Emma watched the clock for the first ten minutes of detention. It was so slow she could swear the hand was about to go backwards. She used her arms as a pillow and set her head against them, closing her eyes. One advantage of being the way she was, was that at least she could zone out more effectively than most. It made time go surprisingly quickly and next thing she knew, she was on the way to the Spanish room.

She walked through the already open door to see Miss Mills marking tests at her desk. With those reading glasses on. _Oh my god,_ Emma thought, _this woman gets prettier every time I see her, and those glasses…sexy as all hell._ She was jarred out of her thoughts as the teacher looked up.

"Hola," her teacher smiled.

"Hola," Emma repeated, trying to quieten the thoughts that were seriously crushing on her teacher right now.

"Como esta?" Miss Mills gestured to the seat in front of her.

Emma sat down, shrugging, "Estoy bien."

"Como fue la detencion?" the brunette raised a single eyebrow, a small smile playing on her lips.

Emma bit her lip as she squinted her eyes in concentration, "Um…something about detention?" she guessed.

Miss Mills smiled, "I asked you how detention was," she answered.

Emma shrugged, "It was…detention. It's boring as hell."

"I think that is the point, dear," Miss Mills said, "May I ask how you landed yourself in detention?"

Emma stifled a yawn, "Well, I'm there for the next few weeks. Just from being late, not handing in assignments. Oh and I think I was rude to Miss Blanchard last week," she shrugged, letting her yawn escape.

Miss Mills grimaced, "Miss Blanchard? I thought everybody loved her?"

Emma raised her eyebrows at the hint of jealousy in her teacher's tone, "Well, a lot of people do, I guess. She's like super nice and she grades pretty easily. She always grants extensions if you ask…" she trailed off.

"So what happened?" Miss Mills leaned forward; it wasn't her business but she was curious that a student had a dislike for the star teacher of the school.

Emma looked down at her hands as they fiddled with her pen, "Well, she's so positive all the time and it's pretty unrealistic and she was glorifying Romeo and Juliet, so um, I called her on it and I said it wasn't a beautiful love story at all, it was a tragic story about two stupid teenagers who hardly knew each other, acted on hormonal impulses, took things way too far and ended up dead, so if that's a beautiful love story then no wonder the divorce rate is so high," she finished sheepishly, but unable to hold back the smirk that took over her lips; she still thought she had a point.

Miss Mills tried to hold back her own smile as she shook her head, "She can't give you detention for having an opinion though," she frowned.

"Well…" Emma sighed, "I might have said it a little too aggressively and um, when she didn't agree with me I told her she was a rose-tinted glasses wearing idiot that wouldn't know real life if it came up and bit her on the…"

"I see," Miss Mills nodded, holding back a laugh; what she would have paid to have seen that scene, "Well, I'm sure you don't need a lecture on how you should respect teachers," she elevated her eyebrows in an amused expression and even Emma could see she was entertained, which made her strangely proud, "Now, why don't we get some study?"

Emma spotted Ruby and walked over to her, taking a seat in the booth.

"Hey, what's up?" Ruby asked, sucking on the straw of her drink.

Emma yawned, "Nothing much, you?" she rubbed her eyes, sleepily.

"Nah, same old, same old," Ruby shrugged, "How was the sesh with the lovely Miss Mills?" she laughed briefly.

Emma smiled, "She's pretty cool for a teacher, actually. I might actually pass the test on Friday."

Ruby grinned, "I don't think I've ever heard you say a single nice thing about school, let alone a teacher, Em. Good for you."

Emma rolled her eyes but chuckled, "She's pretty damn fine too," she admitted in a mutter, "It kinda makes it fun to study when she's speaking Spanish at me with that voice, I mean damn."

Ruby laughed, "I knew it. You totally have a crush."

Emma grinned sheepishly, "Maybe. Hey, where's Belle at anyway?"

Ruby looked at her watch, "She said she was running late. I think she was stopping by at the library on the way for something rather."

"Oh, right, she ordered that new book, didn't she tell you? She's been talking about it for weeks," Emma shrugged.

Ruby frowned, "Nah, she hasn't mentioned it."

Emma nodded, "It must have been when I was helping her out at the library a couple weeks ago."

"You still do that?" Ruby asked, her frown deepening.

"Yeah, of course, if I'm bored," Emma replied.

"Oh," was all Ruby replied with.

Emma chewed the inside of her cheek as she looked around for her best friend, she checked her watch again, "Maybe I should text her."

Ruby rolled her eyes, "Or maybe _I_ should," she commented, pulling out her phone as she huffed.

Emma wore an expression of confusion, "O…K," she simply said as her friend typed away on her phone but then her own phone lit up and she looked at it, "Oh, she says she's still ten minutes away," she informed Ruby.

Ruby glowered at her, "She texted you? Why wouldn't she text me?"

Emma shrugged, "She knows we're both here, why does it matter who she texts? I'm her best friend, you know."

"And I'm her girlfriend," Ruby shot back.

"And right now, you're acting like you're ten," Emma shook her head, she was too tired for this shit.

"Am not," Ruby replied, "You're just jealous."

Emma's eyes widened, "What? Jealous? You're the one who's jealous, Ruby."

"What do I have to be jealous of?" Ruby sneered.

"Mine and Belle's friendship," Emma said, "It's obvious you don't like it."

"And it's obvious you don't like me being with Belle," Ruby growled.

Emma sighed, "Look, it's not that Ruby," she decided it was time to diffuse the situation, "It's just she's my best friend and always has been. It's hard to get used to her being with someone and I don't see as much of her as I used to."

"You had your chance, Emma, it's not my fault you were just too messed up to take it," Ruby snapped viciously, before realising what she'd just said to her friend, "Em, I'm sorry, I didn't – "

It was too late, Emma's fist connected with the brunette's face.

"Fuck you," she muttered as she pushed past a shocked Ruby roughly and slammed the door behind her.

She liked to think that her friends saw her without all the stigma that the rest of the world had. She knew Belle did, at least, she worried about her, sure, but she knew there was more to Emma than just her issues. She'd thought the same of Ruby, but then she'd opened her big, stupid mouth. Emma power-walked home, trying to walk off her anger.

She shouldn't have hit Ruby and she knew that it was a big step backwards in her temper control, but the truth was, maybe she was jealous. Not that she wanted to be romantically involved with Belle, but she did like having her alone time with her best friend, which she hadn't in recent times because it was always the three of them.

She sighed angrily as she pushed open her front door, chucked down her keys and collapsed on the couch, letting her eyes flutter close.

"She hit you?" Belle put a hand on her girlfriend's jaw, "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," Ruby muttered, "It was my fault, I said something stupid, Belle," she admitted.

Belle frowned, "What did you say?"

"I accused her of being jealous of us… And I told her," the brunette sighed, hesitating for a moment, "that um, she had her chance with you…and she was too messed up to take it," she finished quietly, trying to gauge her girlfriend's reaction.

"Ruby," Belle exclaimed, "Why would you…argh, I should go and find her," she stood up.

Ruby grabbed her arm, "Belle, come on, I'm sorry okay? I tried to apologise but that's when…" she gestured to her face, shrugging.

Belle sat down, "You know she's still struggling. I haven't had much alone time with her recently," she rolled her eyes at Ruby's expression, "God, I don't mean like that, but she's my best friend, and she can't always…talk when you're around."

Ruby sighed but nodded, "Yeah, I know. I get it… You should call her, make sure she's okay."

Belle nodded, pulling out her phone.

Emma groaned, picking up her phone as it rung, again. Belle's name flashed up on the screen and Emma pressed the ignore button, again. She didn't know if Belle would be calling to yell at her or make sure she was alright, knowing her friend, probably both, but the blonde couldn't be bothered dealing with anyone right now.

She felt like shit and it wasn't even the Ruby thing; she was over it, she knew she'd been in the wrong and she knew that Ruby probably felt bad what she said. But these new pills she was taking were making her mood jump all over the places, and she hated to cry for no reason and right now her throat felt like it was on fire.

She stood up and paced her apartment, everything, her hands, her heart, her head felt like they were going to explode. She hated this feeling and tonight was worse than usual; she didn't even feel comfortable picking up the phone to call her best friend. She scolded herself upon letting out a sob, _there's nothing to cry about you idiot. _She slammed her fist onto the kitchen bench, needing to just do something, with such force that a cup teetering on the edge had fallen off. She tried, but wasn't quick enough to save it and it smashed on the kitchen tiles.

Emma sighed in frustration and slid down next to the fragments, picking up the biggest piece she could see. Her mind had gone blank and it was like auto—pilot as she rolled up her sleeve and pressed the glass into her skin, finally letting a few tears spill out as the blood began to travel the length of her arm. _There,_ she thought, _a reason to cry._

Nearly an hour later, her phone rung again and finally Emma picked it up.

"Hey, Belle," she tried to sound casual.

"Finally. I was about to sneak out, Em, my parents wouldn't let me come over so late, are you okay?"

"Sure, I'm fine," Emma said confidently.

Belle sighed, "And that's why you hit Ruby?" she asked, but not accusingly.

Emma plonked herself on the couch, "Belle, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt her or anything, I just…she just grated on my last nerve and I…ugh, I'm an idiot."

"An incoherent idiot," Belle agreed, "You know, maybe it's time you tell your doc these new meds aren't working for you. It's been over a month, and Em…I'm worried about you. You're worse than before, you're losing your temper, you're withdrawn and I know maybe it's my fault, I've been spending a lot of time – "

"No," Emma cut in, "It's not your fault at all," she absently-mindedl ran a finger over the cut she had made on her arm, "And you're right, I feel awful. I should give Dr Hopper a call," she sighed, "Is Ruby okay?"

"Good," her friend sounded relieved, "And yeah, Ruby's alright. She's sorry, she says she wound you up… Em, I'm sorry I haven't been there for you," she sounded sorry too, guilty.

Emma closed her eyes, "Don't worry about it, Belle. I just…it's weird seeing you with a girlfriend, that's all. We've been best friends since we were kids, I'm used to having you to myself," she sighed, rolling her eyes at herself, "But we're growing up and relationships happen. I have to deal with that."

"Hmm," Belle mused, not in complete certainty, "But you are my best friend, Em. You'll always be one of the most important people in my life, you know that, right?"

Emma smiled, "I know. And same back to you," she failed to stifle a yawn, "It's late, I'm going to try get some shut-eye."

"Good luck," Belle said earnestly, knowing her friend would be lucky to get four hours of sleep a night, "Love you, Em."

Emma hesitated; not because she didn't, but they both just knew, they didn't say it very often, "I love you too, Belle. I'll see you tomorrow, night."

"Night. Hey Em," Belle said quickly, hoping her friend hadn't hung up.

"Yeah?" Emma asked.

"If you ever need me, call me. I can sneak out and come over, if you need me."

Emma chortled, "Your parents would only hate me even more," she replied, "But thanks Belle. Night."


	2. A Helping Hand

**CHAPTER 2.**

Emma yawned, spinning a pencil on her desk over and over as her English teacher, Miss Blanchard droned on about some other Shakespeare play. It wasn't that Emma didn't enjoy the stories, but the format and the old English drove her crazy and Miss Blanchard was always so chirpy.

"Am I boring you, Miss Swan?"

That last yawn must have been louder than she thought and she should have apologised but she thought hey, honesty was the best policy right? "Well, now that you mention it…" she shrugged.

Miss Blanchard shook her head, "Have you read the play? Do you know everything I have to say?"

Emma knew she should have stopped, she was only going to get herself into more trouble but sometimes she couldn't help being a smart ass, "Basically. I mean, it's Shakespeare, right? So there's some love story, some conflict, probably some dude dressing as a chick for some reason or another and someone will die and it'll all end in tears," she shrugged, stifling another yawn, "But you'll think it's super romantic and wonderfully written, and oh yeah, Shakespeare's plays were meant to be seen but not read but the school's so fucking cheap they won't let us see a production."

The English teacher's eyes glowered, "Get out, Miss Swan and come back at the end of class."

Emma merely grinned and saluted as she picked up her books and left the classroom.

Belle was sitting in the library reading a book intently when Emma fell into the chair opposite her.

"Hey, don't you have English?" she asked, frowning.

Emma shrugged, her lips upturning sheepishly, "I got kicked out."

Belle sighed and rolled her eyes, "What now?" she asked.

Belle loved her friend to death, she was family, but Emma was trouble. Belle's parents had never liked her, it probably didn't help that the first time they met her she had been smoking in their backyard. From then on, it only got worse; Belle had missed a few classes trying to help Emma out of her moods, or convincing her to go to class or the counsellor. When they had study dates, Emma would either horse around or end up frustrated and yelling at Belle.

Belle could see past all that though; Emma had a heart of gold, really, she just didn't have faith that she could do anything with it. That was Belle's theory anyway. She saw a different Emma than everyone else, she saw the blonde make the daggiest jokes, go lovesick over attractive woman and she was the most loyal person Belle knew.

"Told Miss Blanchard Shakespeare was all the same," she shrugged, "Hey, you've said it too, Belle," she added.

"Not to a teacher though, Em," Belle pointed out.

Emma chewed her lip, "She's so annoying. Anyway, I think I might drop out," she replied nonchalantly.

Belle felt her body stiffen, "And do what, Em?"

"I don't know," Emma admitted, "I just hate this place," her voice rose slightly until Belle's hand touched her own, "I'm not good at school like you. I'm not like, academic."

Belle shook her head, "That's bullshit and you know it. You're one of the smartest people I know, you could pass any class if you just – "

"If I just what?" Emma snapped, "If I could stay awake? If I could concentrate? If I could be someone completely different?"

The brunette forced herself not to snap right back, "You've given up," she said softly, "You're not trying anymore, that's why you can't pass. I know it's harder for you, but you used to manage okay but this year? You don't believe you can do it."

As the bell rung, Emma stood up, swinging a bag over her shoulder and met Belle's eyes with her own, "I'm doomed, Belle," she said evenly, almost sternly, "Everyone else has known it for years. You're the one who doesn't believe," and with that, she turned and walked out.

Emma passed the last of the students leaving the English classroom and approached her teacher, who sighed on her approach.

"You know why I asked you back, don't you?" she asked you.

"I don't read minds," Emma knew she was baiting the teacher, she just didn't care.

Miss Blanchard shook her head, "You're failing my class, Miss Swan. You haven't handed in any assignments, you talk back in class, you're never on time. I don't know why you're still here."

Emma shrugged, "Well, I won't trouble you any longer, I'm going to drop out," she informed the teacher, planning on visiting the office for the appropriate forms after this pleasant conversation.

"Well, Emma, I really don't think you're going to get very far in the real world with this attitude," Miss Blanchard was in full lecture mode, "You may think you are the most hard done by person in the world, but there are people who would kill to be in the position you are. I don't think you have any idea how lucky you really are."

Emma could feel the anger course throughout every limb and ground her teeth, trying to clear her head of the impulsive words she wanted to spit, picking instead, "You don't know anything about me," delivered through clenched teeth.

"Perhaps," Miss Blanchard nodded in agreement, "It's just a pity to see young people waste their potential because they think they know everything."

"What's a pity, Miss Blanchard, is ignorant adult's thinking _they _know anything about what another person is feeling or going through."

"I don't care what the email says, Emma, everybody goes through rough patches. You are _not _special," the teacher knew as soon as the words were out of her mouth she'd made a mistake. This was the complete opposite of what she usually told her students, of course they were all special in their own way, but Emma had some kind of entitlement complex and it frustrated her. She shouldn't have to treat one student any different to another.

"Well, thanks for the inspiring chat, teach, but I've gotta get busy wasting my potential," Emma retorted coldly before slamming the classroom door.

Ruby pulled her lips from her girlfriend's neck, sighing and looking at the distracted girl beneath her.

"What's going on in that head of yours?" she whispered, leaning on her side and absently trailing her fingers over Belle's waist.

"Nothing," Belle muttered, "Just you know, stuff."

Ruby raised an eyebrow, "Well, that's the most incoherent sentence I've ever heard you deliver. You're a bad liar too," she smiled, her eyes trying to bore into Belle's mind.

Belle shrugged, turning into Ruby's chest and breathing a heavy sigh.

Ruby sighed too, "Are you worried about Emma?" she guessed, and felt Belle's body stiffen against her. Pulling back, she put a hand under Belle's chin, "Hey, it's okay if you are. I know I was an idiot the other day, but I won't be jealous. She's your friend, she's _our_ friend and to be honest, I'm worried too. She's not herself lately."

"You should tell her that, you know," Belle said.

Ruby shrugged, "She doesn't listen to me, Belle. She only talks about that stuff with you. I love her and everything but," she shrugged again, "she just doesn't confide in me."

Belle frowned for a moment, "I know, but…sometimes I think she's probably sick of people pretending her illness doesn't exist. Maybe she needs more people to acknowledge it. I don't know, I'm no expert."

Ruby thought for a minute, "Okay," she nodded, "I'll try talk to her at school tomorrow."

Belle closed her eyes, "I don't think she'll come. She says she's dropping out."

"She said that last year too, remember?" Ruby looked concerned too though.

"I think she was serious this time, Rubes. It will be the worst thing for her, the last thing she needs is to spend all her time alone in that apartment," Belle's worry misted her eyes over, "I wish there was more I could do for her," she added quietly.

Ruby put her arms around Belle and pulled her closely into her body, kissing the top of her head, "You do everything you can for her, babe. She couldn't ask for a better friend than you."

Regina closed the door to her classroom as the bell rung, looking once again around the room at her students. Emma hadn't been here all week, and today was the test they had studied for the week before. She knew how important this test was. The Spanish teacher handed out the tests and sat at her desk; she should be marking work, but she couldn't help having a bad feeling about Emma Swan.

As soon as the bell rang and all the tests were collected, Regina headed to the coordinator's office.

"Hey, I'm just wondering if there's a contact number for Emma Swan? We had a test today and she's been absent all week," she said professionally whilst trying to hide her internal anxieties.

"Emma Swan?" the coordinator Mr Gold asked, "Well, I don't know if she'll be back, Regina. She had an argument with another staff member on Monday and mentioned she was dropping out. She hasn't shown up since."

Regina's heart beat quickened, "Has anybody tried to contact her?"

"I don't believe so. She is free to drop out if she wishes."

The brunette rolled her eyes, "Right, of course but she only has one year to go, surely we should encourage her to finish her schooling?"

The coordinator sighed, clearly annoyed by the amount of interest the brunette had in this student, "Quite frankly, with a few less Emma Swan's this school would run a little more smoothly."

Regina's jaw could have hit the ground but she kept her cool, kind of, "I believe that is called discrimination."

Mr Gold rolled his eyes this time, "Look, if you want to talk her into coming back, be my guest, but I can guess that the other teachers won't thank you for it. Miss Blanchard seems to be getting the brunt of it, so I'm sure you'll have her to deal with."

"We don't become teachers to have an easy job, Mr Gold," Regina said coldly, before turning on her heel and walking out.

There was a knock at the door; Emma frowned, she wasn't expecting anyone tonight. She was meant to catch up with Ruby and Belle tomorrow. She hauled herself off the couch and made her way to the door.

"Oh, Ruby, hey," Emma was surprised to see her friend alone at the door, "What's up?"

Ruby shrugged, letting herself in, "Missed you at school, didn't I?" she raised an eyebrow, letting Emma know that she knew.

"Spose so," Emma simply agreed, "Is everything okay? Is Belle – "

Ruby waved a dismissive hand, "I'm fine, Belle's fine," she smiled, but Emma noticed her shifting from foot to foot; it was rare to see her confident friend so awkward.

"Good," Emma said, still confused, "You wanna coke or something?"

"Coke's good," Ruby nodded as friend buried her head in the fridge, "Keeping the place clean, I see," she said sarcastically, looking around at the mess her friend was living in.

Emma handed Ruby her drink and opened her own, sitting back on the couch and clearing a space for her friend, "Yeah, well…," she shrugged, trailing off, "How are you and Belle anyway?"

Ruby internally rolled her eyes; master of deflection – Emma Swan, "Really good. She's pretty much perfect," she couldn't help the grin that broke over her face, "I really, really like her," she hesitated, "but…"

Emma's tilted her head, "But what?"

"I don't wanna talk about Belle and I," Ruby admitted.

"Oh," Emma nodded, "I know. Last time…I ended up…punching you. I'm sorry Rubes – "

Ruby shook her head, "No, it's not that, Em. We talked about that, we're good," she paused, "It's just…this whole dropping out thing, are you really sure that's what's best for you?"

The blonde was taken aback; Ruby and her usually just talked girls, and gossip and stupid stuff, "Are you here to lecture me?" she guessed, scowling.

Ruby sighed, "I don't want to lecture you, man. I just reckon you should think about it a bit more. I mean, if you're not at school what are you going to do?"

"Rejoice," Emma joked but sighed at the stern look on her friends face, "I don't know," she admitted, "I just can't be in that place. It's hard. I don't think you guys know how hard… " she trailed off.

"We try, Em," Ruby replied earnestly.

Emma nodded, "I know you do," and she did, "I feel so…below par. It drives me crazy, I can't keep up. You know, Belle and I used to read together when we were kids."

Ruby smiled, "Really? I didn't know that."

"Yeah, we had this tree house out in the forest and we'd swap books and read for hours," Emma reminisced, "Then I started these stupid meds," her face was etched with frustration, "and I'd try to read but I couldn't. I used to sit there and watch Belle read. One day, she realised I wasn't reading and she asked why. When I told her, she gave me a hug and she told me not to worry, if I couldn't concentrate enough to read, she'd read to me," she smiled again, "Then we started high school…and I guess I went off the rails. She's amazing in everything she does, she still reads like crazy and I'm just…stuck."

Ruby had to smile at the image of her girlfriend reading to Emma; it sounded just like something Belle would do, but her face fell as Emma had continued, "You're not stuck, Em. I know you think you're on your own on this, but you're not. I know we can't necessarily understand what you feel, but you know we'd do anything for you, right?"

Emma dropped her eyes and nodded, "I know," she simply said.

"You'll still do it one day, you know," Ruby continued.

"What?" Emma questioned.

"Write a book," Ruby responded, "I know your head is full of so much creativity. You'll get your head sorted, they'll find the right mix. But, finish school. It's so important. Remember what you said to Belle and I when they first put you on meds?"

Emma frowned and shook her head, "Nope."

"You said you were going to get better, you were going to do everything you dreamed and live a normal life like everyone else. You were so determined," Ruby pressed, "Where's that Emma gone?"

"That Emma was naïve, Rubes," the blonde teenager stared ahead blankly.

Ruby's phone rang and she pulled it out of her pocket, "Hello?...Yeah, soon…I said soon. Mhm, bye," she hung up, "Sorry. Granny needs me a shift later. Why don't you come with me and I'll shout you dinner?"

"It's cool, you go. I'm just gonna hang out here. We're doing dinner tomorrow anyway, yeah?" Emma ran a hand through her hair; really, she just wanted to be alone.

Ruby nodded as she stood up, "Yeah, we'll be at Granny's at 5. Please, think about coming back to school, Em. You know me and Belle will help you any way we can."

Emma nodded unsurely, "I know. Have a good shift, I'll see you tomorrow," she hugged her friend and closed the door after her with a guilty sigh of relief.

It was only an hour later that another knock came on the door. Emma rubbed her eyes, slowly waking from a light sleep and trudged back towards the door grumpily. It must be Belle, seriously, were they tag teaming her or what? Surely they could just gang up on her tomorrow at dinner?

"Belle, seriously, Ruby has already been here, I don't need any more lectures from – " she swung the door open and stopped in surprise, "Oh. Um. Miss Mills?"

"Well, apparently you needn't call me that anymore, I hear you're dropping out," she put a hand up to silence Emma's protest, "And so, dear, I think a lecture is exactly what you need. Are you going to invite me in?"

Emma blushed. Her house was a pigsty, she hadn't done the dishes in days, there were clothes everywhere and even books splattered on the floor after she had tried and failed to read more than a couple of pages. And her teacher was at her door. Not just any teacher, her very attractive Spanish teacher who she may have imagined once or twice swooping in to save her from her shitty life.

"Um, sorry about the mess," Emma muttered embarrassed as she stepped aside, allowing Regina to pass into the apartment.

Regina looked around and sighed, "You can't live like this, Emma. It's not healthy."

Emma shrugged, "I'm not a clean freak, so what?"

"It's hardly about being a clean freak, dear, though a little organisation wouldn't go astray. Now, let's sit down and have a chat."

Emma sighed and threw some clothes from the couch onto the floor, almost blushing again as Regina pursed her lips but remained quiet.

"You want a drink or something?" Emma cursed herself for nearly forgetting her manners.

"A black tea would be fantastic, thank you," Regina stood up and followed Emma into the kitchen but Emma stopped her, "Surely, this cannot be messier than the rest of the house?" she quirked an eyebrow.

Emma shrugged, "No, it's just I smashed a glass the other night, I don't want you to step on it or anything."

"The other night?" Regina repeated as a question before sighing, "Do you have a dust pan somewhere?"

Emma frowned as Regina began opening cupboards, "Hey, you don't have to – "

"Aha," Regina exclaimed as she pulled one out of the cupboard and went into the kitchen to see glass strewn all over the kitchen floor, "Hm, this is not just one glass, is it? What happened, Emma?"

The blonde teenager fidgeted as she put the kettle on and waited for it to boil, "I got mad," she simply replied, honestly.

"Have you seen your doctor lately?" Regina asked as she swept up the glass into the pan, stopping suddenly as something caught her eye. A large shard of glass, she picked it up as Emma turned away from her to make the tea. Blood. A lot of blood. She swallowed hard, looking at the teenagers back; she was wearing long sleeves, it was not hot out, but it was certainly not cool either.

"No, I keep meaning to make an appointment but I forget," Emma answered, oblivious to her teacher's finding.

"Emma," Regina said so quietly the teenager was forced to turn around to find the woman right behind her with a hand on her arm, which Emma instinctively pulled away.

"What?" she said, a defensive edge to her voice but the look in her teachers eye told her she knew something and when she looked down, she saw the shard of glass in her teachers other hand before she put it on the bench next to them and reached for the blonde's arm again.

"Show me," Regina whispered, her eyes fixed on Emma's lowered face.

"It's fine," Emma mumbled, trying to pull away from the older woman but she had a tighter grip this time.

"Please, dear, let me help," there was the slightest evidence of a crack in Regina's voice.

That crack made Emma look up and make eye contact with the other woman again and after a moment, she relaxed her arm and merely nodded. Regina rolled up her sleeve gently, careful not to react when she saw the scars over the teenagers arms.

"Oh, honey," Regina suddenly pulled the younger girl into a tight embrace, causing Emma to immediately burst into tears against her teachers shoulder, "Shh, it's okay," she whispered, running a hand over her back comfortingly, "Let it all out."

Eventually, Emma pulled herself out of her teachers arms, wiping her eyes angrily.

"I'm sorry," she mumbled, angry at herself for breaking down in front of someone; she usually preferred this as a solo activity.

"Do not apologise," her teacher replied, "for being human."

Emma sniffed, staring at the ground, "I can't go back to school," she said quietly.

Regina didn't take her eyes off the younger woman, "I know you don't want to be there – "

Emma growled frustrated, "It's not… I don't want to be anywhere, okay? It just hurts. Every night, I go to sleep and I think the pain will stop but it never does. I just wake up and go through it all again until it builds so high that…," she gestured to her arm, "and then it bubbles down a while but it always, always builds back up. My good days are still so far below anyone else's normal bad day's and…" she realised how much she was talking, how much she was giving away and went silent.

Regina pulled her student over to the couch and sat her down, holding one of her hands in her own, "I'm not going to pretend I understand, Emma," she started, "But if you…," she took a deep breath, "If you really did end it, you would never know if you could beat it. You would never know if you could chase your dreams. You need to give yourself a chance to do these things, I know you don't want to hear it, but you're so young. I don't even want to mention all the people who would be heartbroken if you left them – "

Emma snorted, "Don't you know? Ruby and Belle are my only friends. They'd be fine," she muttered, knowing it wasn't true.

Regina rose an eyebrow, "You know that's bullshit, from what I see and hear they adore you. Losing someone you love, especially through suicide, is something you never get over."

Emma sighed, "Everybody forgets eventually."

Regina shook her head, "No, dear that's not true," she hesitated before continuing, "When I was only a little older than you…my best friend committed suicide – "

Emma's eyes widened, "Oh god, I'm sorry. I'm such an idiot, I'm sorry, I – "

Regina squeezed her hands, "Sh, it's okay, really. But I still think about her all the time, I tried to help her, like your friends try to help you, but she was just so cut off… she wouldn't let anyone in and she didn't believe she was worthy to live," she swallowed hard, trying to keep her composure, "I never, ever forgot her. Neither did any of her friends, or her family. One day, she was there and the next…"

This time it was Emma who embraced the other woman, "I'm sorry," she didn't know what else to say, "You must hate me," she whispered, pulling away.

Regina closed her eyes, shaking her head, "No, dear, I don't hate you at all. I worry about you. A lot. You remind me of her, you were both fighters but this illness…it's underestimated, I don't think people realise that it takes as many lives as physical illnesses do. But I've seen you on good days and you have fire and light in your eyes, you laugh, you're witty. You have a spirit about you, Emma, that touches anybody who's life you touch," she paused, saddened because she could see the girl in front of her was fighting to believe what Regina was saying, "I want to help you with more than just Spanish."

Emma had lowered her eyes; she didn't like making new friends, it felt like a waste of time, but she felt very close to her teacher at this point and swallowed the lump in her throat, "I just don't know what you can do to help," she said quietly, "Belle asks me all the time what she can do to help me, but I really don't know."

Regina looked around the apartment, lost in deep thought when she noticed the blonde staring up at her with some a flicker of hope in her eyes. She smiled at her student, "I think you should come and stay with me," she said confidently.

Emma was shocked and frowned, "With you? But you're my teacher."

Regina's lips upturned, "Does that mean you're staying at school?"

Emma shrugged, "I don't know."

"Either way, I think you should come and stay with me," the Spanish teacher repeated and continued when Emma just frowned, "Honey, this place is a mess. You're just a child, you can't do this on your own. You have no adult influence in your life. I _can_ help you, if you let me."

Emma bit on her bottom lip; she knew it was true, she'd missed having someone older to talk to the way she could talk to her teacher, but all her foster parents had been horrible or misguided people. They hadn't understood, they hadn't wanted to understand but here was Miss Mills, who did want to understand, who wanted to take care of her…

"I'll just disappoint you," she said quietly.

Regina sighed, "Emma, please. Truth be told, I get lonely living by myself too," she shrugged, trying a different tact, seeing the battle occurring etched in the features of the young woman's face, "It would be nice to have someone around."

Emma's eyes connected with the brunette's and she hesitated before nodding, "Okay," she whispered and crawled into her teacher's open arms, feeling the tears pricking her eyes.


	3. Still Trying

**A/N: This is quickly running out of my control to be honest, haha. I kinda meant it to be one thing and it's turned into another, but I'm enjoying it so I'll keep going. Any reviews/comments/suggestions/likes/dislikes would be appreciated! Thanks guys **

CHAPTER 3

The move had been quick and seamless; it wasn't as though Emma had many belongings to pack up, basically just her clothes, laptop and books. They had done a quick tidy up, to leave the house presentable, though the teenager had decided not to let it go yet. Who knew how long until her teacher realised she had made a stupid mistake by letting a troubled student stay with her?

"I know you're used to being very independent, dear but I do want to set down some ground rules," Regina explained as the two of them ate lunch around the kitchen table.

Emma nodded slowly, "Okay, fair enough. I'm not great with rules," she screwed up her face, "But I'll try."

"Good," Regina smiled, "Firstly, I don't want you calling me Miss Mills when we're not at school, it's strange."

Emma smiled right back, "Okay, I guess I can do that. But it is kind of weird to call a teacher by their first name."

"Well, I'm not just your teacher, I'm your friend, dear," Regina clarified, "And speaking of school, I am not going to force you to go back, I can't, though I think it's a good idea, but if you do not go back to school then I want you to find something else to fill your days, other study perhaps, work, volunteering, I don't want you spending all your time alone. I don't think that helps."

Emma swallowed a snide remark and nodded, "You're right," she admitted reluctantly, "I haven't made a final decision about school yet, anyway."

Regina tried not to let the hope shine in her eyes when she heard and moved on calmly, "You mentioned a while ago you like late night walks… How late is late?"

Emma bit her lip knowing her teacher wouldn't like the answer, "I don't know, like midnight maybe…or later sometimes," she muttered.

Regina shook her head, "It's not safe, darling. I'm sorry, it's just not and if you got hurt while I was trying to look after you, I would never forgive myself," this one she was nervous about; she knew she wasn't Emma's mother and she didn't want to impose too many rules on the girl.

Emma sighed, "I've never ran into any trouble," she shrugged, but gave in, "But yeah, okay."

"Why do you walk so late, dear?" Regina asked.

"Um, if I can't sleep or I want to think…or not think, I don't know," the blonde shrugged again.

Regina nodded but didn't push the subject, "I see. Next, I would like you to make an appointment with your doctor as soon as possible," Regina delivered this one sternly; there was no room to budge here.

Emma nodded, letting out a sigh, "Okay."

Regina smiled, "Well, I have one final request that I would really like you to abide to, if it is possible."

Emma was nervous and cracked her knuckles as she awaited her teacher's request.

"If you feel like hurting yourself," Regina started and spoke cautiously, "I don't care what time of the day or night it is, I would like you to tell me. I know you are used to dealing with these feelings on your own, but I think we need to break that cycle."

Emma chewed on the inside of her cheek nervously, "It's hard," she mumbled.

Regina's eyes softened and she reached across the table, taking the girl's hand, "I know it is, honey. But it's very important if I am going to help you. I know you may not trust me completely – "

"I do trust you, though," Emma interjected quickly, before blushing.

Regina merely smiled, "I'm glad. So, please, just try. You don't even have to say anything, we could just have a code word, or a symbol or something."

Emma bit her lip, "Okay. A symbol or something, I'll think of something."

"Good," Regina nodded, "I think that is all… Unless, you have anything to add, dear?"

Emma thought for a moment, "Well, you know I get some money from the government, so I can give you some rent – "

"No," Regina put up a hand, "I don't need or want your money, Emma. You are just a child, I know you're eighteen already, but I want you to have some semblance of what it is like to grow up with a strong adult influence," she purposely avoided using words like parents or mother, besides she hardly wanted to be the woman's mother.

Emma thought about arguing but she could see she wouldn't get anywhere, "Fine…but the offer is there," she settled on, "What about my friends? Am I, like, allowed to go out with them? We have dinner at Granny's every Tuesday, sometimes I get home kinda late."

"I am not going to stop you seeing your friends, Emma. On the contrary, I think seeing Ruby and Belle is good for you, they seem like nice girls."

"They are," Emma agreed, "And on the subject, um, are they allowed to know I'm staying here? I mean, I don't want to get you in trouble or anything."

Regina frowned, "At the moment, you are not my student, so technically, I think this is okay," she wasn't sure about this, but she would convince the teenager she was not a dirty little secret, "And anyway, you are over eighteen, so I think…well, anyway yes you can tell them, but just be discreet and be sure that they are too," she was constantly reminding herself that the teenager was over eighteen, especially when she was reminded that her feelings for this girl went far beyond a student-teacher relationship, but no, she knew that right now, Emma's mental health was the number one priority at the moment.

"Of course," Emma nodded, "I'll make sure I go to Granny's with them, I won't bring them home or anything – "

"Dear, they are your friends and quite frankly, I would like to meet them outside of school, so yes you will have them over. I want this to be your home, Emma, not just the place that you sleep."

Emma nodded, "Hm, okay," she said, realising that she'd never really had a 'home' like that before, other than her place and even then, it wasn't exactly warm and fuzzy. She didn't ever think she'd have that kind of home other people spoke about, that kind of safety, belonging. Could she really have that now?

Belle was laughing as Ruby tickled her in the booth with an evil smirk on her face, not relenting despite Belle's requests until finally, she giggled herself and let her girlfriend go.

"I told you not to tickle me," Belle pouted.

Ruby just grinned, "But you're so cute when you laugh like that and you rarely laugh at my jokes," she shrugged, "What's a girl to do?"

Belle laughed, "Get better material," she delivered.

Ruby put a hand on her heart, "Ouch, babe, cruel."

Belle rolled her eyes but planted a peck on Ruby's cheek, "Sorry, your jokes are very funny," she said, seriously but followed with a giggle.

"About as funny as mine, lucky we have you to laugh at us," Emma approached the two with the first genuine smile they'd seen on her in a while.

The two part pulled a part a little and looked up at her.

"Hey, I'm totally funnier than you. You're just a dag," Ruby teased as she stood up and gave her friend a quick hug.

Emma grinned, "Yeah, well… would you have me any other way?" she hugged Belle tightly and pulled out a chair, sitting down, "I'm starved," she declared.

"Me too, you're late you know, Swan," Belle pointed out.

"Sorry, I was busy," Emma said cryptically, "What do you guys want? You think your Granny can whip me up some pasta?"

Ruby nodded, "Sure, I'll go put our order in, what do you want babe? Hang on," she held up a hand, "Stupid question. Burger. Fries."

Belle pretended to look hurt for a moment before she smiled, "Thanks Rubes."

Ruby bounced away happily behind the counter to find her Granny.

"So, busy?" Belle frowned, "What were you up to?"

Emma chewed her lip, "Wait for Ruby to get back, I don't want to go through this twice," she mumbled.

Belle leaned forward, "Do you have a girlfriend?" she guessed, eyes shining with curiosity.

Emma rolled her eyes, "No, Belle. I would have called you if that was the case, silly."

Ruby climbed back into the booth next to her girlfriend, slinging her arm around Belle's shoulders, "So, what's new Em?"

Belle nudged Ruby, "She has news," she shared.

"New girlfriend?" Ruby asked, quirking an eyebrow, "Who is she?"

Emma sighed in exasperation, "Ugh, it's not a new girlfriend, jeez you guys," she shook her head.

"So, what is it?" Belle prompted, "Are you coming back to school?" the hope was evident in her eyes.

Emma shifted in her seat uncomfortably, "Maybe, I haven't decided," she shrugged, "It's not that, anyway," she started chewing her nails; nervous habit's.

"Jeez, Em, the anticipation, just tell us," Ruby insisted.

"Sorry," Emma muttered, "Um, well you know Miss Mills was helping me with my study, right?"

The two girls frowned but nodded, wondering where this was going.

"Well, I guess it became more than that – "

"Holy shit, you bagged the Spanish teacher?" Ruby looked impressed as Belle rolled her eyes.

"No!" Emma blushed, "God, no," she didn't add that she wished that were the case, "I just mean, she's really good talk to about stuff," she shrugged.

"So…another reason to come back to school?" Belle asked, hopefully.

Emma shrugged, "Maybe. But um, I don't really need to come to school to see her," she said slowly, "cause um…she's letting me stay with her," she finished quietly.

Belle blinked, tilting her head while Ruby was strangely quiet.

"You're staying with her?" Belle asked.

Emma nodded, "Yeah. I mean, it's nothing dodgy or anything."

"How…did that happen?" Belle creased up her face, trying to understand the seemingly random news her friend had just delivered.

Emma sighed, "You know that night you sent Ruby over?"

Belle thought about denying it but nodded.

"Well, after that Miss Mills came over, which probably sounds a bit weird, I guess," she said, looking at her friends pulling confused faces, "But she was trying to talk me into staying at school," she explained slowly, "Anyway, she kinda figured out that…," she took a deep breath, dreading this next sentence, but how could her friends help her if they didn't know what was going on? "I cut the other night," she lowered her eyes, staring at the table, "We had this d and m…she kinda told me something personal about someone close to her… anyway, I guess she was worried about me and I was talking pretty negatively, so she said I should go stay with her. That I shouldn't be alone."

"I didn't think you were doing that anymore," Belle was stuck on the fact that her friend had started self-harming again.

"I don't. I didn't. It just started recently," Emma muttered, playing with her hands.

Ruby nodded, "Are you like, allowed to stay with her?"

Belle nodded, "Isn't it weird? She's a teacher, Em, plus you have a crush on her, couldn't that get complicated?"

Emma blushed and ducked her head again, "Well, technically, I'm not her student at the moment. But I don't know. I trust her, I can talk to her."

Belle looked hurt, "You talk to me though?"

Emma felt guilty for the look on her friend's face, "I know, I do and i love you guys, but it's different," she paused, running her tongue over her teeth, "I mean, Belle your parents are awesome and Ruby, you have Granny, not to mention all the extended family. I've never had an adult I trusted before," she shrugged, "All my foster parents were…" she looked at Belle, who nodded, "And that's why I got out of the system as soon as I could, but being on my own is hard too."

Belle pondered for a moment, "Yeah, I guess I can understand that, Em. If you think she can help you, then I think that's great, and I, we," she nudged Ruby in the ribs, who nodded, "support you. We'll always support you, but please keep us in the loop."

Emma nodded and looked at Ruby, "Ruby?"

"Belle's right," the brunette said confidently, "If she can help you, sure. I can't imagine not growing up with my family around me and I know your foster homes weren't great… not that you ever talk about it," she frowned but Belle shook her head, "but yeah, like Belle says," she smiled at her girlfriend, "we support you. I guess this is like, a secret though right?"

The blonde nodded, "Well, yeah. I mean, no. I don't know the technicalities, but I think don't mention it to anyone for now, at least."

"Totally," Ruby bopped her head up and down and the three went silent as their meals were placed in front of them.

Emma yawned, "Thanks guys. I'm really lucky to have you guys in my life," she smiled; it was true, she was feeling grateful since Regina had told her about her friend.

Belle climbed out of the booth and gave her friend a hug, "We're lucky to have you too, Swan. I love you."

Emma returned the hug, holding on a little longer than usual, "I love you too, Belle," she rested her head on her shoulder.

"Aw, you two," Ruby teased gently as Belle took her seat.

"You're awake at a reasonable time," Regina noted as she poured herself an orange juice.

Emma nodded, "I thought…I might get a lift to school?" she said sheepishly.

Regina's face broke out into a grin, "Great! I mean, that's a very good, decision. I'm glad, Emma," she smiled kindly at the teenager.

Emma couldn't help smiling at her teachers reaction, "Thanks. I feel really…lucky you've taken me in. I've never had anywhere…stable before."

Regina frowned, wondering just what had happened at the teenager's foster homes that made her so hostile towards adults, a conversation for another time, perhaps, "It is more than okay, dear."

"Oh and I was thinking you know, you said you wanted me to tell you if I felt…like hurting myself or whatever, we could have a symbol or something?"

"Yes, dear, did you think of something?" Regina asked.

Emma shrugged, "Well, if I feel…like that, can I just say nine, like either verbally or with my fingers," she held up nine fingers before shrugging again, "Is it stupid?"

"It's not stupid, dear, but why nine, may I ask?" the older woman was curious.

"Well…you're the ninth person to take me in…so," she shrugged, sheepishly.

Regina smiled, "Lucky number nine."

Emma swallowed the last of her toast and nodded, taking off to her room to get ready for her first day at school in two weeks.

Belle yawned as her girlfriend approached and sat down beside her.

"You tired, babe?" Ruby kissed her on the cheek.

Belle nodded, "Yeah, I slept like crap. I have three tests today, so I was up all night studying."

Ruby rolled her eyes, "You hardly need to study so late, Belle, you're a genius."

Belle smiled, "I am not," she replied shyly, "Besides, I like getting good marks, what's so wrong with that?"

"Nothing," Ruby agreed, "It's super cute, though I do get jealous of your books sometimes," she teased before going in for another kiss.

"Jeez guys, get a room."

Belle jumped out of her seat, "SWAN!" she squealed, causing a few laugh's around the cafeteria, she pounced onto her friend, hugging her tightly, "You're back! Yay! This is awesome. I knew you'd come back, well I hoped, I mean."

"Belle, you're kinda suffocating me," Emma choked out and her friend released her, "You know, I'm gonna need your help," she said.

"Of course," Belle beamed, "Anything. I can help you in anything but Spanish, but I guess you have that covered, huh?"

Emma followed her friend's eyes, looking behind her to see Miss Mills chatting with another teacher, "Yeah, I guess I do. Hey, I wanted to ask you another favour too, but it's kind of silly," she said as she sat down and pulled out the sandwich she had made earlier.

It felt weird to be back at this place, it felt like it had been longer than two weeks and she wouldn't admit it out loud but she was still scared. But at least for today, she felt the fighter ignited inside her, and she knew she had to take advantage of that while it was still there. She'd been living with this illness for long enough to know it could withdraw itself at any time and she could fall back into a depression.

A few days later, Emma _had_ made an appointment with her doctor, more so for Regina than herself. She had never been able to open up to any professional, even though she knew it would probably help if she did, but hey, umpteenth time lucky, right?

"It's been a while, I was wondering when I'd hear from you again," Dr Hopper smiled kindly as he gestured for Emma to sit down.

Emma shrugged, "Yeah, I got sick of talking I guess."

"Well, if anything, I don't quite think you talk enough, Emma. Can you tell me what's been going on?"

Emma was playing with her fingers unable to look at her therapist, "I don't know, I guess I've gone a bit backwards or something. I feel like shit all the time. I had some trouble at school too, I'm just," she sighed and went silent, feeling her chest tighten, "I don't know."

The doctor frowned, "Have you been taking your medication?"

"Mhm," Emma answered, crossing her arms over her stomach and hugging herself. She hated this place, she knew the doctor was only trying to help and he seemed like a nice man, but every time she walked in here, it was like she stopped breathing and everything tensed up and she wanted to run outside just so she could get some air into her lungs.

"Any self harm?" Dr Hopper asked.

Emma bit her tongue so hard it hurt as she felt her hands shake and clenched them, she blinked slowly, trying to calm herself but it didn't work, it never worked and she stood up, "I'm sorry, I can't do this," she muttered and quickly walked to the door before the doctor could protest, skipping the stairs two at a time to escape the clinic.

She turned the corner into a quiet alley and threw herself against a wall, holding her chest and trying to breathe some air into her lungs but couldn't breathe in deeply enough and it only made her heart rate soar. She sunk down against the wall and gave way to the lump in her throat as she allowed herself to sob.

Swearing at herself for being so weak, she grasped fistfuls of her hair and squeezed her eyes shut, trying to block out the world. Her jaw hurt from clenching her teeth but she didn't know what else to do, except sit there a total mess and wait for it to pass.


	4. True Family

Chapter 4.

Regina walked into the house out of the afternoon sun and looked around, not seeing the teenager she was now accustomed to seeing on the couch watching television. She called out, but received no answer. Frowning, she put her bag down and opened the fridge; she noticed there had been juice in the fridge earlier, now there wasn't. Perhaps Emma was in her room, she thought, and made her way there.

Knocking on the door, she still received no answer, but cracked it open anyway. There was Emma asleep in her bed, but Regina's face crinkled with worry as she opened the door further and spotted the whiskey bottle on the bedside drawers. She sighed; admittedly, she hadn't even thought to be concerned with alcohol, but it seemed obvious – she was a teenager after all.

Emma groaned and slowly opened her eyes, seeing the older woman looking at the whiskey bottle.

Regina heard the groan and looked at her, "Oh, dear…"

Emma smiled clumsily, "You're pretty" she slurred, turning onto her side to look at her teacher.

Regina sighed, "And you're drunk."

"Mm," Emma agreed, reaching out a hand to hold Regina's and pull her closer, "But you're more pretty than I am drunk," she claimed.

Regina shook her head, "No, dear, I think not. Did you have this whole bottle to yourself?"

Emma nodded somewhat proudly, "Yep, sorry, I should have left you some, huh?"

Regina rolled her eyes at the drunk teenager, "Why don't you get some sleep? We'll talk later."

Emma shrugged, "I like talking to you," she said as her eyelids grew heavy.

The older woman sighed, "I like talking to you too," she smiled as she put a hand through the teenagers hair as her eyes started to close, "That's it, sleep," she whispered before kissing her on the forehead.

"You kissed me," Emma mumbled, "That's nice."

Regina shook her head as she left the room. She knew this wasn't typical teenage drinking. She also knew Emma was drunk enough to say a thousand more embarrassing things if she stayed in the room with her; the best thing to do was wait for her to sleep it off so they could have a proper conversation.

She replaced the whiskey bottle with a glass of water and settled on the couch as she did some marking in front of the television, waiting for Emma to wake up.

Emma groaned as she woke up and yawned, rubbing her eyes as her head throbbed. Ugh, she thought, it had been so long since she'd turned to drink, but one stupid session with her psychiatrist and in a moment of weakness she'd ruined things…again. She pulled the pillow over her head, clenching her teeth and trying to block the pain from her head, which, of course, never worked.

She threw the pillow to the end of the bed and it was then that she realised the whiskey bottle had been replaced with a glass of water and the memory of Regina finding her still drunk flooded back. Groaning again, she swore. She hadn't meant to sleep so long, she'd meant to get up before Regina got home and clean up. She'd gotten used to it in the group homes; she'd just hide the bottles in a neighbours bin or under a pile of other recyclables and getting sober by the time anyone else got home…then waiting for them to leave again so she could pull the bottles back out.

She wondered about the conversation that would take place when she left her room. A lecture, she supposed. She'd wondered if she'd pushed things too far. That made her angry and she put her head in her hands, she'd only been here a few days and she'd probably already screwed things up. Truth was, she enjoyed living with Regina, it was nice having an adult around who actually listened and who actually cared and she wasn't ready to go back to being on her own.

She sighed and sculled the water down before standing up and opening the door, making her way to the kitchen. Regina was concentrated on her marking and didn't hear her come down the stairs. Emma stood awkwardly in the kitchen for a moment, before getting another glass of water. The noise attracted Regina's attention and she made her way over to the kitchen, where Emma was sculling another glass of water.

"You know, it works better if you sip it," Regina stated with a raised eyebrow.

Emma stopped sculling and nodded, "Okay," she said meekly, "I'm sorry – "

Regina shook her head, "Is this a regular thing, dear? Getting drunk in the middle of the day?"

Emma looked at her feet, ashamed, "No, it's not. I swear, it won't happen again."

"Emma, I'm not asking you so I can yell at you," Regina said gently, watching the young woman almost cower in front of her, "I'm asking so I can help you. It's hard for me to know how to help you if I don't know what's going on."

Emma nodded as she looked up at the brunette sceptically; adults were never kind to her…she knew Regina was different, but she still was an adult, right?

"It's not a regular thing," Emma said, "It kinda used to be, I guess, but I stopped drinking a while ago," she shrugged.

Regina frowned, "How long ago?"

"Like a year, I guess," Emma still couldn't meet her teachers eyes.

"What made you stop?" the brunette spoke softly, trying to look into the teenager's avoiding eyes as she moved into the kitchen, removing the bench as a barrier between the two.

Emma sniffed and took another sip of water, "Um, Belle mostly," she admitted, "She was getting really worried about me…she said if I didn't stop, she was going to tell someone, some adult… ," she shrugged, "Not that adults ever cared…until you," she finally looked up.

"It must have been bad, if she was that worried about you?" Regina asked, still trying to gauge the situation.

Emma nodded, "It was for a while. I had about three months where I drank every day, I got used to functioning on it, I suppose."

That sounded very serious for someone so young, Regina thought, "What happened today? Did something happen at the doctor's?"

Emma chewed her bottom lip, "I walked out," she muttered.

Regina sighed and put a hand under the blonde's chin, raising it to look at her, "Why, honey?"

"I can't talk to him," Emma admitted, "I've tried, really, but I just can't. I've seen so many stupid doctor's and I just freeze, I suck, I just can't – "

"You do not suck," Regina said firmly, "You're scared, Emma. It's understandable that you find it hard to trust people with the way you have grown up. We can find you someone else to see, a lot of people go through many doctor's before they find one they can trust."

Emma shook her head, "It won't work."

Regina's brow furrowed as she tried to understand, "Why not? You can talk to your friends, you talk to me quite well, it's not as though you can't articulate yourself. You just need to find a psychiatrist who you connect with."

The blonde threw up her hands in exasperation, "Because around here, they're all men. I can't talk to men."

Regina hid her reaction to this little outburst, "Okay," she said calmly, "That's fine, dear. We can find a woman for you to talk to, if that's easier."

Emma felt the heat crawling up her skin, "There isn't any. I mean," she stuttered, "around here, most of them are men and the women psychiatrists always seem to work at fancy places. It's so expensive. I don't…I can't…"

Regina's eyes widened; Emma was worried about the money? It made her kind of angry at whoever it was that had given her the idea that money was more important than her health, "Emma, we will figure it out. The money doesn't matter. I mean that, okay? This is your health, dear, it is much more important than anything else," she said softly.

Emma still shook her head, "No. I don't want you to pay for it. You're not my mom," she muttered.

Regina swallowed hard as she put a hand on Emma's cheek, "No, I'm not," she said softly, "But I care very much about you and I want you to get the help you need so you can flourish and be happy. I didn't grow up with very much family either, Emma, and in the short time I've known you, I have grown to care about you as much as any family. Please, let me help you."

Emma felt her heart clench at those words and her eyes grow watery, she stepped forward and dipped her head into Regina's chest as the older woman wrapped her arms around her.

"I'll pay you back," she mumbled against Regina's body.

"The only way you will pay me back is to keep on trying," Regina whispered.

Emma listened to her friend's voice as she closed her eyes and let it wash over her.

"Are you asleep?" Belle whispered gently.

Emma cracked her eyes open, "No, I'm awake. Keep going, please."

Belle smiled at her friend lying in her lap and continued to read. She had missed these moments with her best friend. It probably sounded juvenile to anyone else; hanging out in a tree house reading to one another, but it was their thing and always had been. It was nice to reconnect like this.

Emma yawned as she sat up as Belle finished off a chapter. She'd always loved watching Belle read, she read so intensely yet her face completely relaxed when she delved into a story. Her eyes shone like nothing else Emma had ever seen.

"Thanks Belle, this has been really nice," she spoke gently, "I've missed this."

Belle smiled, "I have too, Swan," she pulled her friend close and embraced her, "I'd forgotten how fun this is."

Emma chuckled, "It is fun. I miss reading so much," her face fell slightly.

Belle nodded, "I can't imagine what it would be like not to be able to read," she frowned, "But hey, I can read to you any time. I mean it."

The blonde teenager smiled, "Thanks, Belle," she bit her lip as she wiped the smile from her face, "Hey, um… I drank last night," she said nervously, watching her friend's face closely, trying to gauge her reaction.

Belle's face fell and she sighed, "Oh, Em. What happened?"

Emma shrugged, "I don't know," she hesitated briefly before looking into her friend's worried eyes, "I saw Dr Hopper again… I thought I could talk…but…same old, same old."

Belle put her hands over Emma's, "Em, it's okay not to be able to talk to him. Just because he's a doctor doesn't mean you'll automatically trust him. I really think you should try and find a woman to talk to, it makes sense you don't trust men, Em," she squeezed her friend's hands as Emma broke eye contact, "I can help you pay, really."

Emma sighed and closed her eyes for a moment before she opened them and looked at her friend guiltily, "I don't want you to pay, Belle," she mumbled, "Anyway, Regina, Miss Mills says she'll pay…but I don't know, I don't want that either."

"Swan, it is okay to accept help," Belle said firmly, "You're my family, you know that and family helps each other out at tough times."

"Yeah, but I'm always in tough times," Emma muttered, eyes downcast.

Belle put a hand on Emma's cheek, "You won't always be. Plus it's not like you've never helped me, Em. Remember what I was like when we were kids? I wouldn't speak a single word, and then we became friends… "

"You still don't talk much," Emma smiled.

Belle blushed, "But compared to before… You made me feel better about myself. I don't think I'd have self confidence if it wasn't for you, Em."

Emma shrugged, "Yeah you would. You're amazing, Belle."

Belle smiled, still rosy-cheeked, "I never knew that anyone thought that though, until you came along. Plus, you showed me new things, made me less…"

"Sheltered?" Emma suggested before biting her lip but her friend nodded, "New things, huh? Like smoking? Drinking?"

"Kisising," Belle said quietly before breaking eye contact.

Emma blushed too, "Well, if anyone was gonna be my first kiss, I'm glad it was you."

Belle nibbled her bottom lip, "Yeah, me too."

"Does Ruby know?" Emma suddenly asked.

Belle shook her head, "No, I guess not. It never came up. I mean, it's not like we were together or anything, we were just…"

"Experimenting?" Emma suggested.

Belle shrugged, "I guess."

Emma smiled, reminiscing, "You said you were fifteen and you still hadn't been kissed. You said nobody would ever want to kiss you."

"Yeah and you grabbed me and kissed me and said shut up, anybody who didn't want to kiss you was a total idiot," Belle shook her head.

Emma laughed, "Well, it's true," she yawned, checking her watch, "It's getting late. We should head back, your parents don't need any more reason to hate me."

Belle nodded as she packed her bag full of books and slung it over her shoulder, "So how is it with Miss Mills? Does she know about the drinking?"

Emma groaned, "Yeah, she found me drunk. I think I tried to tell her she was pretty or something," she shook her head, "I'm such an idiot."

Belle smiled sympathetically, "No, you're not. You just have a crush. But Em?"

Emma raised her eyebrows, "What?"

"Please don't drink… You know what that stuff does to you," Belle's eyes were wide and it made Emma feel guilty as all hell.

With her throat constricted, she nodded, "I know."

"Have you told Miss Mills about – "

"No," Emma answered sharply, before sighing, "You know I can't talk about it."

Belle pulled a face, "You talked about it to me."

Emma nodded, "Yeah…the only person ever," she mumbled, looking up, "Hey, maybe… never mind," she muttered.

Belle tilted her head, "What is it, Em?"

"Maybe...if I do see a woman psych…could you come with me?" she asked me meekly.

Belle's eyes misted up, "Of course," her voice cracked slightly, "Anything," she added as she wrapped her arms around her friend.

"Hey," Emma greeted Regina as she closed the door behind her, shivering, "It's freezing out there."

"Hello, dear. Did you have a nice time with Belle?" Regina asked as she turned the stove off and began to dish up dinner.

Emma nodded, "Yeah, it was great," she smiled, rubbing her arms trying to get herself warm.

Regina nodded, offering a small smile of her own, "So…" she stopped mid-thought and shook her head.

Emma frowned, tilting her head and watching the awkward brunette, "Hm? What?"

"Belle is going out with Ruby, right?" the teacher asked.

Emma nodded, "Yep."

"So you and Belle…" Regina hesitated once again.

Emma squinted, "Me and Belle… Oh, no. We're best friends. I've known her since forever, in and out of all these stupid foster home's we managed to stay in contact… she's basically the only family I have," she finished quietly.

Regina nodded, "That's why you seem so close," she concluded.

Emma shrugged, "Yeah, I guess so. I mean…there was something… I mean, last year, she told me she had feelings for me," she stopped, frowning.

"And you didn't return those feelings?" Regina asked, curiously.

"Actually, I did," Emma replied quietly, "But I was so messed up… I'd only just stopped drinking. I just thought that she deserved better than me."

Regina shook her head, "Oh, dear. You think far too lowly of yourself."

Emma bit her tongue before saying, "That's what Belle said too, but I refused to put her through any more than I already had in just being her friend."

Regina frowned, "But you seem to have gotten over all that? That show's true strength of your friendship."

"We always said our friendship came first, so yeah, we got over it, and now she's with Ruby so," she shrugged.

"And you're okay with that?" the brunette watched the teenager closely.

Emma nodded, "Ruby's great and Belle really likes her so I'm happy for her. She deserves someone who can treat her right."

"So do you, dear," Regina spoke softly, "Now today, I called around and I have made you an appointment for next week. Please do not fret about the costs involved, Emma, I will take care of it and no protesting," she said firmly.

Emma bit down on her lip and nodded, "Okay… thanks, Regina. I mean it, I'm not used to having someone do so much for me…"

Regina smiled, "I know, and I plan on changing that."

"Um, I asked Belle if she'd come with me to the appointment…there's something I've only talked about with her and I think it's pretty important so," she shrugged.

The teacher nodded, deciding not to push the subject, "Of course, honey. Whatever makes you feel the most comfortable."

Emma stared at the ceiling until her eyes blurred and everything merged together. She sighed; this was ridiculous, she thought, she'd been trying to sleep for hours. She climbed out of bed and went to the bathroom, splashing water on her face and taking a deep breath.

Regina woke up with a start and rubbed her eyes quickly before she noticed the blonde teenager standing in her doorway. She sat up.

"Emma? Are you okay?" she asked concernedly.

Emma shifted on her feet anxiously, "I can't sleep. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have woken you – "

Regina rolled her eyes as her lips curled upwards, "It's okay, dear. Come here," she beckoned to Emma.

Emma approached cautiously and sat on the bed next to her teacher. Regina put a hand on her shoulder and looked at her quizzically.

"Is there something on your mind?" Regina asked.

Emma bit her lip, nodding but not speaking.

Regina frowned and put a hand in the young woman's hair, "Honey, you can't keep everything to yourself, you're allowed to need other people."

Emma was chewing the inside of cheek viciously, "I know," she muttered, "Some things are just hard to talk about."

"I know, sweetheart," the older woman said gently, "But if something is keeping you up at night, maybe it needs to be spoken about. You don't have to talk to me, just talk to someone."

"I want to talk to you, though," Emma mumbled quietly, head ducked low.

Regina's eyes softened at the sight of the deflated teenager and she put her arms around her and felt Emma nuzzle into her chest as she placed a hand in blonde hair.

"Shh, it's okay, honey," Regina comforted, "You'll talk when you're ready."


	5. A Bad Day

Chapter 5.

Emma's knee bounced up and down quickly until a hand gave it a gentle squeeze.

"It's alright, Em," Belle reassured her with a sweet smile.

Emma looked at her, grateful that her best friend was with her, "Uh-huh," she merely replied.

She could feel her heart thumping in her chest; she hated seeing new therapists, starting all over again sucked. She really hoped this was the last time she had to do it.

"Emma Swan?"

Emma's whole body tensed up as she stood up, walking as close to Belle as she could. Her friend grabbed her hand lightly and squeezed her fingers.

"You did really well, Swan," Belle insisted as the two walked down the street, "Did you like her?"

"She seemed okay, I suppose," Emma mumbled as she pulled her beanie on, covering her ears from the wind.

Belle nodded, "It will take a while before you can trust her, that's normal."

"Mm," Emma simply agreed.

"Shall we go to Granny's?" Belle asked as they reached the street corner.

Emma shrugged, "You want to come back to mine instead? I don't really want to be around everyone right now."

Belle's eyebrows rose, "Um, am I allowed? I mean, with Miss Mills…"

"No, she said you can come over whenever. Plus, I'm sure she'll understand, and she's probably worrying about how it went, anyway," Emma bit her lip after the last statement.

Belle just nodded, "Okay, cool, let's go then. But, Em?" she frowned.

"Yeah?" Emma asked.

"What am I meant to call her? Does she tell you off if you swear? Does she know about me and Ruby or should I not mention – "

Emma laughed, "She'll probably tell you to call her Regina. And you don't swear anyway," she teased, "Yes, she knows about you and Ruby and she knows about you and me too. Just don't treat her like she's a teacher, I guess, she's actually really cool, you know, for an older person."

"Older person?" Belle giggled, "I don't think you should call her that."

"An adult," Emma rolled her eyes, "You know what I mean."

"Yeah, I know," Belle agreed, "Hang on, you told her about us? Like last year, you mean or?"

Emma nodded meekly, "She asked if we were ever a thing…so I told her."

"She asked you that?" Belle questioned thoughtfully.

"Yeah, well, she asked about you and Ruby and then about you and me, one thing led to the other," Emma shrugged, rubbing her hands together to fight the icy wind.

Belle tilted her head, "Is she allowed to ask her students stuff like that? Hang on, does she like you? Was she jealous?"

Emma rolled her eyes, "No, it's not like that, Belle," she replied, honestly, "I mean, she's super hot and everything and she's got these really cute pj's…" she shook her head, "But, no, I think she's just like interested. She's always asking me stuff, she says the more she knows, the more she can help me. I guess that makes sense, right?"

Belle nodded, "It makes sense…as long as she isn't pushy about it," she raised her eyebrows.

"She isn't pushy at all," Emma bit back a smile, "She's actually really sweet about it. And protective too. She gives these hugs like…" she trailed off.

Belle couldn't help smiling widely at her blushing friends, "Hugs like…?" she teased gently.

Emma was still blushing, "I don't know, she's very snuggly, I guess," she couldn't pull the stupid grin off of her face, "She makes me feel like…warm and safe."

Regina was cooking. She always cooked when she had something on her mind. Currently, what was on her mind was Emma and her appointment. It was more than that, she was constantly worrying that she wasn't enough for the young woman. She wanted to help her so badly and sometimes she feared that she couldn't provide what Emma needed.

But she always shook those thoughts out of her head, reminding herself, sometimes all someone needed was someone to be there, and that she could do for Emma.

The door clicked open as she closed the oven door and she walked out into the foyer, surprised to see Belle accompanying Emma through the front door.

"Hello girls," she smiled.

"Hey," Emma replied as she took off her scarf hanging it up.

"Hi, Miss Mills," Belle smiled shyly, standing awkwardly behind Emma.

Regina smiled, "Please, call me Regina outside of school, dear."

Belle nodded, "Okay… Regina," she scrunched up her face at how strange it was calling a teacher by her first name.

"How did it go, dear?" Regina's eyes were painted with worry.

Emma bit her lip, looking at Belle then back to Regina, "It was okay. She seemed fine, I suppose… I mean, first sessions are always pretty boring when they just want to get to know you. I guess we'll see," she shrugged.

Regina nodded, "Yes, we will. I've got some turnover's cooking if you girls would like some."

Emma smiled, "You always cook when you're stressed," she noted, "But I do love your turnover's," she added sheepishly.

"I know you do," Regina smiled, shaking her head, "Maybe that's why I cook them."

Belle watched this exchange curiously; she'd never seen her friend so open with an adult, she was usually so closed up and tense around her parents, or even Granny, even though she'd known them for years. She was distracted when her phone buzzed and pulled it out.

"Oh, it's Ruby," she smiled, "We were going to meet at Granny's later," her smile turned to a frown as she looked at Emma, "But it's cool. I'll just see her tomorrow," she shrugged.

"She is welcome to come over here if you would like," Regina stated, "Or you can all go to Granny's, whichever you prefer."

Emma bit her lip, "I just didn't really want to be around crowds today," she mumbled.

Regina nodded, "Emma, I have told you, your friends are more than welcome in this house. If it will make you more comfortable, I can make myself scarce."

"No," Emma said quickly, "I don't want that," she turned to Belle, "Text her back, tell her to come over."

Belle thought about protesting but sighed and started pressing the button's on her phone.

"Are those turnover's ready yet?" Emma licked her lips.

Regina laughed, "They should be, come, help me serve," she stood up and Emma followed her out of the room, leaving Ruby and Belle in the lounge.

"Yum, I can taste it already," Emma bounced after her teacher.

Regina turned around to smile at her, "You're in a good mood," she noted.

Emma stopped in her tracks and looked thoughtful, "I suppose I am," she agreed.

Regina bent down to open the oven and Emma couldn't help her eyes averting straight to the woman's ass, it seemed no matter what she wore it always hugged her hips just perfectly. Emma was practically drooling but composed herself as the brunette pulled out the tray and set it on the bench.

Emma reached out to the tray but Regina swatted her hand away, "Not yet, you'll burn yourself."

"Aw, come on, I'm starving," Emma pouted, "Plus they look really good. You cook the best turnover's ever."

Regina rolled her eyes, "Stop sucking up, you. Wait five minutes first."

Emma smiled, "Fine, fine," she sighed, giving in.

"So, is she like all teachery?" Ruby asked in a hushed voice as the other two left the room.

Belle rolled her eyes, "She seems okay, she's nice."

"Seriously? You've been here an hour and that's it? No goss?" Ruby encouraged.

Belle just laughed at her girlfriend, "There's no gossip to tell, Ruby. She's just like a normal person."

Regina smiled as she entered the room, "Thank you, Belle," she said, smirking as Ruby shrunk back in her seat, "Ah, don't worry, Ruby, if I had been in a teachers house at your age I probably would have wanted some kind of gossip too."

Ruby blushed but allowed herself a small smile as Belle rolled her eyes.

Emma had a mouthful of apple pie, "This is delicious, you guys should have some," she managed to get past the food in her mouth.

"Em, would you swallow before you talk? Jeez," Belle shook her head.

"I would second that request, dear," Regina added.

Emma just grinned before she took another bite, "It's so good, though."

Ruby took some pie and bit into it, "Whoa, Miss Mi-…Regina, this is so good. Don't tell my Granny I said anything, but it might even be better than hers. Maybe."

Regina smiled widely; always proud to hear compliments on her food, "Why thank you, dear, but I'm sure you're exaggerating."

"No, she's really not," Emma said enthusiastically before swallowing, "Yours is better than Granny's. Sorry, Rubes," she grinned at her friend.

"Emma, really, must you talk with your mouth full?" Regina shook her head, despite finding the teenager somewhat endearing as she woofed down another slice of her turnover.

Emma merely nodded as she rested back on her chair, looking satisfied.

"She does seem pretty nice, don't you think?" Belle asked, "I've never seen Emma like that with an adult before."

Ruby smirked, "Yeah, because she's hot."

Belle rolled her eyes, "Is that all you think about?"

Ruby bumped her shoulder into her girlfriend playfully, "Nah, I think she seems pretty cool for a teacher and those turnovers, damn," she licked her lips.

Belle laughed as leaned into Ruby's side, "Don't let Granny hear you say that," she teased quietly.

Ruby just laughed, zipping her lips, "Yeah, yeah," they reached the corner where they sent their separate ways and stopped under the streetlight, "How about I walk you home?"

Belle blushed; she still wasn't used to Ruby's sweet side, "My parents are out for the night," she mumbled, "Why don't you come over?"

Ruby tilted her head, "It's late, don't you wanna go to bed? School in the morning," she both loved and hated how dedicated her girlfriend was to her education.

Belle shrugged, "We could go to sleep…couldn't we?"

Ruby frowned, "Really? Are you sure?"

"I said sleep, Ruby," Belle mumbled as she blushed.

Ruby rolled her eyes, "I know, but we hardly ever sleep together, usually just when you fall asleep on the couch, which is adorable by the way," she grinned.

"Do you wanna come over or not?" Belle asked, entwining her fingers with Ruby's.

Ruby nodded enthusiastically, "Sure, let's go," she squeezed Belle's hand.

"Emma," Regina knocked on the teenagers door, "Are you up? I'm leaving in half hour if you want a lift," she smiled upon hearing Emma groan, "I'll take that as a yes."

"Uh-huh," Emma mumbled as she reluctantly threw the covers off and opened the door, running a hand through her hair as she dragged her feet to the kitchen.

Regina was still in her pj's and Emma couldn't help a small smile coming over her face; she'd never imagined seeing her teacher in cute silk pyjama's. She looked so much less intimidating than at school.

"What are you grinning at?" Regina asked, curiously.

_Busted_, Emma thought, shrugging, "Nothing," she lied, turning to the fridge and opening it.

Regina narrowed her eyes but didn't push; she had grown used to the teenagers not so subtle stares and had decided to take them as a compliment.

"I'm going to jump into the shower, eat quick, we're running late," Regina instructed as she left the kitchen.

Emma tapped her pen on the desk distractedly until she earned herself a glare from the English teacher, Miss Blanchard. She yawned as she continued writing her essay, wishing she'd gone to bed a little earlier because she was exhausted. She supposed she was lucky it was an English test, even at her worst she still beat most people's normal skill's…not that she was cocky.

Emma had been writing ever since she was a kid, it was the one subject she wasn't struggling with. Her teachers had used to lecture her on wasting her potentials, she wasn't even trying and she would excel; just imagine what she could do if she actually tried. But word got around and at some point, the teachers had stopped giving her those lectures, but that was fine by her. At least, that's what she told herself.

She finished her essay and lay her head on her arms, closing her eyes. At least it was quiet, she thought, as she receded into a world she knew didn't exist but it was still somehow a comfort. She hadn't been doing this, though, quite as much, since she had been living with Miss Mills. There must be something to that, she thought, with her last conscious thought.

"Emma…Emma Swan," a loud voice started her awake.

Shit, she hadn't meant to fall asleep and not so deeply, she pulled her head out of her arms groggily and looked up at Miss Blanchard, "Sorry," she muttered.

"Mhm, essay?" the English teacher merely replied, holding out a hand.

Emma picked it up and handed it to her.

"I'm surprised you could finish this when you slept half of my class," the teacher raised an eyebrow.

"I finished my essay first," Emma shrugged, packing up her bag, "There wasn't exactly anything else to do."

"No homework for any of your classes? I find that quite remarkable, Emma," Miss Blanchard's voice was like ice; but Emma supposed she deserved that.

Emma sighed, "Well, I guess I'll get in trouble with them then," she shot back, "I don't think my other classes are really your business, Miss Blanchard," she was snapping now, but god, this teacher grated her.

"Well, I don't know why you came back if you're not even going to try," Miss Blanchard delivered.

If there was one thing that riled Emma up, it was when people said she wasn't trying, she stood up with clenched fists, "Again, that's none of your business. And you have no idea how hard I'm trying, you act all high and mighty like you know everything – "

"Lower your voice, Emma," Miss Blanchard interjected, looking around the classroom even though it was empty apart from the two of them.

"Wouldn't want anyone hearing how it really is," Emma muttered.

She shook her head, slung her bag over a shoulder and left the classroom before she let her mouth get her in serious trouble.

Ruby had an arm around Belle when Emma arrived, throwing her bag moodily onto the table before sitting down and placing her feet on the seat next to her. Ruby and Belle exchanged glances, Belle leaning forward.

"Everything okay, Swan?" she asked.

Emma shrugged, "Yup."

Belle couldn't help rolling her eyes, "Very convincing."

"Just get off my back, okay?" Emma snapped.

Belle leaned back, "Okay," she muttered; she knew when to leave her best friend alone. Emma could have a foul temper and you didn't want to rile her up when she was in one of her moods.

Ruby and Belle chatted throughout lunch whilst Emma seemed to stare into space, not really paying attention until a visitor came to the table.

"A word, Emma?"

Emma looked up to see her Spanish teacher standing beside the table and frowned as she stood up, "Um, sure," she picked up her bag and gave a quick wave to her friends, noting the worried look on Belle's face.

"Did I do something wrong?" Emma asked, confused as Regina led her into an empty classroom, closing the door.

Regina sighed, "What do you think?"

Emma frowned, "You know I studied for the test afternoon, what – "

"Not in my class, dear," Regina cut in, raising her eyebrows at the student.

"Miss Blanchard dobbed me in to you?" Emma asked incredulously.

Regina shook her head, "I heard her talking to another teacher… and it's not the first time. You're going to get yourself in trouble if you keep giving her attitude. What is it with her that riles you up so much?"

Emma shrugged, "She's a bitch," she answered.

Regina looked at her sternly, "Emma… I am trying to keep you out of trouble here. Why don't you just apologise to her? I don't care if you don't mean it, I just don't want her going higher up with this."

Emma scowled, "I get that you're trying to help, but she's had it in for me since forever," she shrugged.

"Emma," Regina sighed frustratingly, "Please, did you ever think maybe she just doesn't like seeing one of the most gifted writers in this school waste her talent?"

Emma's eyes widened, "You're protecting her?" she asked, shocked, "Ugh, right, this is some kind of teacher brotherhood bullshit. Just because she's a teacher – "

"No," Regina attempted to put her foot down, realising she was unintentionally winding the teenager up, "It's not like that, but I've talked to her – "

"You're on her side," Emma was raising her voice now, "You're just another fucking teacher."

The brunette looked like she'd been slapped in the face.

Emma couldn't find her voice for a moment, blinking rapidly as the teacher turned and headed to the door, "No, Regina, I didn't mean – "

"It's fine," the teacher's hurt was painted on her face, "I'll see you at home."

Emma closed her eyes, berating herself. She had Spanish in a couple of hours; those classes was hard enough pretending that Regina wasn't just another teacher, but now? They'd never even argued before, why hadn't she just thought before she spoke? _I'm so stupid,_ she thought.

Emma unlocked the front door and headed straight to her room, throwing herself onto the bed. She'd really screwed up today, majorly. She knew she was only going to be in more trouble now after skipping Spanish but she couldn't bear to sit there and watch Regina and not be able to apologise to her. It would be too painful.

Though being here, in her house, now felt wrong too. She'd been so harsh. She hadn't even meant it; she knew that Regina was more than just another teacher. She'd done more than any adult had ever done for her. She spent the afternoon beating herself up, until she decided to turn the television on and numb her brain out to feeling.

"Emma?" she hadn't even heard Regina get home, she switched the tv off and rolled off her bed.

"Hi," Emma stood awkwardly.

"You skipped my class?" and there was that hurt look on the brunette's face that killed something inside of Emma.

"I know, I'm sorry, Regina," Emma took a step closer to her teacher, "I know I screwed up today, I didn't think before I spoke, I never meant what I said. You're way more than just a teacher, and I only skipped because it would be too hard seeing you and not being able to apologise to you. I'm so, so sorry."

Regina thought about interrupting but she could the desperation in the teenagers eyes and she knew her words were true; but at the same time, she wondered if it was time to move some discipline into their relationship, "We've never fought before," she started, hesitating, "I can't say I'm a fan," she smiled.

"Me either," Emma's eyes were still wide, "I'm sorry," she repeated, "I shouldn't have spoken to you like that, it was so disrespectful and I do respect you – "

Regina put a hand up, "Emma, I know," she sighed, "But if we argue, you can't just skip my class. That defeats the point of me helping you."

"Can't we just not argue?" Emma smiled sheepishly.

Regina shook her head, "I hope so," she said, "But arguments happen in all relationships, Emma. We are, unfortunately, not immune from that."

Emma nodded sadly.

"It is not always easy for me, honey, trying to be your friend and your teacher," Regina admitted, "You know I can't let you get away with things at school, I can't just turn a blind eye…"

Emma sighed, "Detention, right?"

Regina nodded, "Yes, for the rest of the week. And you need to re-sit the test you missed this afternoon."

Emma nodded, "Okay," she shrugged, "I get it."

Regina quirked an eyebrow, surprised, "You do?"

Emma shrugged again, "Sure. I swore at you, I skipped your class… I know you can't play favourites, you'd get in trouble and that's the last thing I want."

Regina smiled, "Good," she looked at the teenager weakly, "Are we friends again?"

Emma's smile widened, "I hope so," she stepped forward and put her arms around a surprised Regina, who took a moment to react before she returned the embrace.


	6. An Unexpected Visit

_**A/N: Sorry this is a little later and a bit shorter than usual too, I've been ridiculously sick all week Thanks so much for all your comments, they really make my day! Can't wait to know what you think of this chapter and I haven't even decided where to go next, so feel free to put your input in if you have any ideas ;)**_

Chapter 6.

"Darling, come on, wake up," Regina tentatively placed a hand in the teenagers blonde hair as she groaned.

"Weekend," Emma mumbled into her pillow, not opening her eyes.

"I know it's the weekend, but it's one in the afternoon. Weekend or not, you should get up," Regina said gently.

"Mm," Emma merely grumbled quietly, refusing to move.

Regina rolled her eyes, "Such a teenager," she muttered, but with a smile on her face.

Emma twisted around in her blankets to face the brunette, "I am a teenager though," she pouted, finally opening her eyes, "It's what we're meant to do. Sleep in."

Regina laughed quietly, "Yes, but you're sleeping the day away, silly, why don't we go out for lunch?"

Emma yawned, still groaning as she stretched, "Okay," she nodded, "Five minutes," she crashed her head back onto the pillow.

Regina chuckled again and kneeled on the bed, "Not five minutes," she said sternly, "You'll just go back to sleep."

"I like sleeping," Emma declared, pulling the other pillow over her head to block Regina out.

Regina couldn't help laughing; sometimes the blonde really was just a teenager, "Trust me, I know you do. But," she pulled the other pillow off Emma, making her squirm around to try and pull it back, "if you don't get up now, I'm going to make you."

Emma spun around to look at her, tilting her head, "Nah-ah," she played, "Can't make me. Bed is warm, bed is good, yup," she nodded.

Regina nodded slowly, "Bed is warm, huh?" she smiled somewhat evilly.

Emma nodded, looking up at the older woman suspiciously. Apparently with good reason, as the blanket was ripped straight out of her hands.

"Hey," she exclaimed, pouting, "That's mean," she pulled her knee's up to her chest.

"Know what else is warm?" Regina asked pointedly, "The shower."

Emma sighed, "Fine," she grumbled as she crawled out of bed, "Hey, but know what else is warm?" she asked suddenly, eyes shining.

Regina narrowed her eyes suspiciously, "Hmm," she hummed, "What would that be?"

Emma bit her lip for a moment, giggling to herself, before throwing herself into the older woman's arms, "You," she offered.

Regina's eyes widened in shock but she smiled, returning the sudden show of affection, "Aw, you big softie," she said quietly, one hand running through blonde hair until the younger woman pulled back.

Emma shrugged, "You are though," she yawned as she rifled through her drawers, "I shall go have a hot shower, then we can go out."

Regina smiled as the teenager walked out of the room with her clothes in tow. It really had been nice having someone else around, even if it was stressful at times. They'd got past the awkward phase quickly, though it had returned briefly when they'd argued, but mostly, the teenager was very easy to be around and Regina had to remind herself that not only was she a teenager, she was still her student.

"What is so interesting on your phone, dear?" Regina asked as she shovelled another piece of lasagne into her mouth; always disappointed, hers was yards above this rubbish. Even Granny's was better than this, but it would raise questions if the two ate there together.

Emma looked p guiltily, "I'm sorry, it's Belle. She's being cryptic," she frowned.

Regina furrowed her brow, "Is everything okay?"

Emma sighed, "I'm not sure," she admitted, tapping out a text back to her friend.

"Belle? Belle?" Ruby sighed and prodded her girlfriend in the ribs.

"Ouch, why did you do that?" Belle snapped, putting her phone down temporarily.

Ruby frowned, "Because you've been on that thing and ignoring me for the last hour."

Belle rolled her eyes, "I'm not ignoring you," she muttered.

"You are," Ruby said firmly, seriously, "Belle, what's going on?"

Belle looked up from her cell phone into her girlfriend dark and concerned eyes, feeling guilt flush through her body, she hesitated, "Nothing," she faked a smile, "It was just Em, we were raving about this book we read the other day, that's all," she lied and put her phone down.

Ruby blinked, staring at her girlfriend for a few moments before nodding, "Okay," she accepted, "So you're still reading to her?" she asked neutrally.

Belle nodded, "Yep, just like old times. It's been nice to reconnect with that part of our past."

Ruby quirked an eyebrow, "Oh," she sighed, "You never read to me," she pouted.

Belle laughed loudly, "You'd hate it," she teased, "We read classics and dissect them, we talk about sentence structure and the writers true agenda. It's very analytical."

"You're right, I'd hate it," Ruby shrugged, placing a kiss on her girlfriend's lips whilst swiping her phone off the couch at the same time. She didn't want to be jealous of that stupid thing, or of Emma, but sometimes she couldn't help it.

Emma squeezed her eyes shut, trying to block out the noise until she realised it was a knocking. She rubbed her eyes and sat up in bed, turning her lamp on and looking at her clock, it was 2am, she rolled out of bed and gasped.

"Belle?" she asked incredulously at the brunette crouching at her window.

Emma opened it and helped the girl climb in, "What the hell are you doing here?" she whispered, "I taught you something after all, huh," she tried to joke lightly as she closed the window against the cold night air.

Belle bent her head into her friend's chest and remained silent.

Emma frowned as she put a hand in her hair, "Hey, it's alright. Belle, what's going on?" and when the girl still refused to answer, "Have you and Ruby had a fight?" she didn't know what else to assume, but it must have been pretty serious for Belle, the perfect child, to sneak out of her house at 2 in the morning.

"No," Belle shook her head and that was when Emma realised she was crying.

Emma panicked; she wasn't good at this comforting thing, she was so used to being on the other end of it, "Belle?" her own voice sounded shaky, "What is it? Please, tell me. Can I do something? Please, tell me what I can do," she begged.

Belle finally pulled out of her friend's chest, wiping her eyes and sniffing, not looking at Emma.

"I got into Columbia," she said softly.

Emma's eyes widened before her eyebrows knitted together, "Belle, that's good news. That's amazing news, why are you so sad?"

Belle was wringing her hands as she looked up at her friends, "It means I have to leave," she explained, still speaking quietly, "I don't want to leave…you."

Emma frowned, "Or Ruby," she stated, confidently.

"Yeah…," Belle moved her head up and down, "But the dream…"

Emma closed her eyes, "I know, we were going to go together, but you've known that's been out of the question for a long time, Belle. I could never get the marks for an Ivy league school, you know that."

"I don't want to go without you, though. I can't," Belle insisted, eyes still shining with mist.

Emma chewed on her lip; she wasn't used to seeing her friend so distraught, "Belle," she put a hand on her friends arm, squeezing it, "You can do anything," she whispered, and she meant it.

Belle shook her head, "But what about you?"

Emma felt the shame course through her veins; she was holding her friend back, she could see that as clear as day, "I'll be alright, Belle," she swallowed hard, "I swear I will. We can catch up all the time, once I get a car... "

'It's over five hours, Em," Belle said, "Don't you even care?"

The blonde looked hurt, "Of course I care," she replied, her voice cracking, "Belle, you're my best friend. I'm gonna miss you like hell, but we're growing up," she got mad at herself for letting the tears gather in her throat and her eyes, "You have to do this, you're going to do amazing things and I'm just going to take a while to catch up. But hey, technology, right?" she offered a weak smile. Of course, she couldn't imagine life without Belle, but her friend had a much bigger destiny than this town; she was meant for more, for the perfect high-end school with the best education the country had to offer. Yeah, it would suck, but she wouldn't be the reason Belle didn't go after her dreams.

Belle just stared back at her friend sadly.

"Have you talked to Ruby?" Emma tried to compose herself, studying her friend's face.

Belle shook her head, "No," she whispered, "I just wanted to talk to you," she lifted her eyes to meet Emma's and they held a silent gaze for a moment.

Belle moved forward and bent up on tiptoe to kiss her best friend's lips. Emma's mind went blank as her hand found itself on the brunette's waist as their lips moved as one.


	7. Words

**A/N: The last one was short, so here's another quick update! Enjoy! **

Chapter 7.

Emma's brain switched on suddenly and her mind flooded. What was she doing? She thought and she pulled away from Belle, and climbed off the bed, not looking at the hurt expression on her friends face.

"We can't do this," Emma whispered, backing herself against the wall as Belle followed her, placing a hand on her cheek.

"Why not?" Belle whispered back, caressing her cheek lightly.

"We're best friends, Belle," Emma breathed, "We've been best friends forever."

"I love you," Belle almost had to choke the words out.

Emma sighed, knocking the back of her head on the wall behind her, "Belle," she almost begged, "What about Ruby?"

Belle looked guilty for a moment and spoke quietly, "Ruby's great, Em, but she's not…," she hesitated, "She's not you."

Emma bit her tongue, hard, until she felt the blood in her mouth; this was so messed up, she thought.

"I can't, Belle," she put up her hands, removing Belle's hand from her face, "I can't," she repeated firmly.

Belle's eyes were wide and watery and she replaced her hand on Emma's neck instead, "But Em, I could take care of you," she whispered, a note of desperation in her voice, "'You know I could."

Emma could feel her heart breaking, "I know you could, Belle," her voice broke as she admitted it, "But you do already."

Belle stared at her best friend for moments on end, "Do you have feelings for me, Emma?" she asked, almost monotonously, still running her fingers over Emma's neck and jaw.

The blonde wanted nothing more than out of this situation right now; it was too hard, it hurt her, it was hurting Belle, _she _was hurting Belle, and the whole time her body was on fire and her lips tingled and her mind thought of Ruby. This was so wrong on so many levels.

"Yes," Emma finally answered through clenched teeth, "But I can't," she pushed Belle away and attempted again, to get some space from her friend.

"Why?" Belle questioned, "Because you don't think you deserve me? That's what you used to say," Belle shook her head, "It's not true, Em – "

"It's not just that," Emma found her mouth saying before she continued chewing the inside of her cheek, looking hopelessly at her friend.

Belle frowned, "Then why?" she pushed, "Don't you think…if you're going to reject me again, you can at least tell me why," she said softly.

Emma could see the guilt flash through her friends eyes, but also the curiosity, no, it was more than that, the need to know.

"Because I like someone else, okay?" Emma admitted, throwing her hands up in frustration, "Belle, please – "

"Who?" Belle asked lowly.

Emma shook her head, "Belle – "

"Regina?" Belle asked, "Come on, she's like thirty? She's too old for you. It's never going to happen."

Emma wanted to hit her, she really wanted this to be over, "I know that," she snapped, "But I really like her, okay? I can't help it, I've tried, but I – "

"It's not like you're in love with her," Belle said, almost mockingly.

Emma lowered her eyes, "I don't know," she shrugged, "Maybe I am. I don't know what I am. I just know the one constant in my life has been my best friend," her eyes were like saucers, "Please, don't change that."

Belle looked at her friend, blinking slowly and taking a deep breath, shaking her head.

"I'm going to go," Belle's words were barely audible as she made her way back to the window, opening it, glancing at her friend one last time before she climbed out.

Emma could feel herself shaking; what the hell had just happened? She sat on her bed and grinded her teeth, trying not to pull out her hair as she gripped it tightly. She rubbed her chest, trying to remind herself to breathe. She wiped at her eyes angrily as she stood up and paced her room. This was too much, she thought, she couldn't lose her best friend.

Just like that, her thoughts were spiralling so fast she felt physically dizzy, slumping against the wall, eyes open but not really seeing anything.

It was more than ten minutes later, she forced herself upright and dragged her feet as she walked to her door, feeling almost zombie-like as she trudged to Regina's door, knocking on it lightly.

Regina stirred in her sleep, wondering what had woken her, until a more persistent knocking sounded through the door. She crawled out of bed and opened the door, to a puffy, red-eyed Emma who was clutching her own chest and sniffling.

"Emma," she breathed, "Honey, what's wrong?"

Emma couldn't even look at the brunette as more tears welled in her eyes. It took her a moment but she forced her hands out in front of her, face still lowered. Regina frowned until she saw that four fingers were up on one hand and five on the other. The symbol. It clicked.

Regina pulled the younger woman into her arms, "Shh, honey it's okay. Not tonight, darling, I won't let you."

Emma sobbed into the older woman's chest, "Sorry," she choked out.

"No, honey, I'm glad you came to me, don't you ever be sorry for that," Regina insisted as she ran her fingers through the teenagers hair and then rubbing her back, "It's okay, is there something I can do to make you feel better?"

Emma burrowed her head deeper into the teacher's chest, "I just…I just don't want to lose her," she sniffed.

Regina was confused, "Who, Emma?"

"Belle," Emma cried, "She's my best friend and I love her to pieces and I'm not completely uninterested her in romantically but she's in love with me and I told her…"

Regina tried to keep up, "Okay, okay. Did she say something to you, dear?"

Emma nodded as she pulled herself from Regina's embrace, "She was here, she snuck out, which she never ever does and she climbed through my window and she…she kissed me," the teenager stopped, swallowing hard.

Regina's eyebrows shot up in surprise, "She kissed you?" she repeated, then berating herself for sounding so shocked.

"Yeah," Emma said quietly, "She kissed me and I kissed her back and we…." She stopped.

Regina took a deep breath, not sure if she should push the teenager further on such a subject, even though, the curiosity was burning in her, "Oh. I mean, did you… Well, I mean you don't have to say…" she sighed, berating herself for her awkwardness.

"Oh," Emma said quickly, blushing, "No, I mean we didn't…have sex or anything," she bit her lip, "But I mean, we kissed and we were, you know…horizontal," she coughed, "But I mean, fully clothed… and then I pulled away and told her we couldn't," she finally managed to stutter out.

"I see," Regina commented calmly, "And she didn't take it well."

Emma shook her head, "She said she could take care of me," she closed her eyes, "And I know she could, I mean she does already, she's the only one whose always been there for me."

Regina frowned, "Emma, I'm sorry to ask so bluntly, but I'm confused. You like her, right? You kissed her, you said you're somewhat interested in her… Is this a self-esteem thing, honey?"

Emma groaned, putting her head in her hands, "No, I do like her. But I really just want her to be my best friend, I think sometimes…we were always the loners at school, we didn't hang out with anyone else and she was always taking care of me through all my…shit," she paused before continuing, "I think maybe, we get a little dependent on each other sometimes."

The older woman nodded, "That makes sense… Sometimes, dear, when we only share ourselves with one person, it can become toxic… but what about her and Ruby? Are they…"

Emma closed her eyes, "They're still together," she replied quietly, "Ugh, it's so complicated."

"Relationships are, sweetheart, whether they're friendships or more than that," Regina said gently, "Perhaps, in the light of day you and Belle can speak again. I know she loves you, Emma, she wants you in her life, whether you want to be with her or not."

Emma was wide eyed again, "I really hope so, I don't know what I'd without her," she muttered, "Anyway, she got into Columbia, so either way," she shrugged.

Regina nodded slowly, "Columbia," she repeated, "That's a big move… Is that what prompted her to…tell you – "

"Yeah," Emma cleared her throat, "I mean, we were always meant to go together, but my study went to shit and she kept excelling…"

Regina looked at the teenager with sympathetic eyes, "Honey, whatever happens, we will get through it, okay?" she took the blonde's hands, squeezing them.

Emma licked her lips nervously, "There was another reason… I had to reject Belle."

Regina frowned, "What's that dear?"

Emma pulled her lip into her mouth and bit it hard, before looking at her hands, still covered by her teachers, "Well…" she cleared her throat, swallowing hard, "You."


	8. Break Ups And Make Ups

Chapter 8.

"M-Me?" Regina stuttered, caught off guard, never expecting the teenager to be so open with her feelings towards her.

Emma nodded, "I like you," she said so quietly the older woman had to strain to hear.

Regina wasn't disrespectful enough to pretend not to know what the teenager meant but she was shocked; she tried to compose herself in order to deal with this situation as best she could.

Perhaps, she thought, she had underestimated the crush, or whatever, that she knew Emma had on her. Was it really so powerful that she would reject the love of her best friend, whom she clearly shared a strong connection with?

"Dear… you know I'm your teacher…" she shook her head, more annoyed at herself than anything else; she rarely spoke to Emma as a student and this was hardly the situation to start, "I just mean, you know I care about you very much… it's just that…" she sighed, this was pathetic, she couldn't even find her words, "I like you too," she heard herself say.

Emma's eyes widened; she had hoped a thousand times but never expected that the older woman actually returned those feelings. She'd innocently believed that it was a one-way thing, after all, teachers didn't fall for their teachers and Regina just wanted to help her, mentor her, keep her on track.

"Oh," Regina said in shock after realising her own words, "Emma, honey, okay. It's like this, if the situation were different perhaps… I would never, ever take advantage of a student – "

Emma's head was tilted, "But you always say I'm your friend, not your student."

Regina nodded, "That's true, dear. But legally…technically…" she didn't even know who she was trying to convince anymore as she looked at the blonde teenager in front of her; at this point she was squirming more than the young girl before her.

Emma frowned as the brunette trailed off helplessly. She didn't even know what had made her say it, other than that she hated to keep secrets from the older woman.

"I get it," the teenager spoke quietly, "I'm too young for you."

Regina licked her lips before she quickly took a step closer to the teenager and took her face in her hands, doing what she too had thought about a thousand times and pressed her lips to Emma's shocked mouth.

Emma's eyes went wide before she blinked quickly, closed her eyes and responded to the lips on her own as she began to move hers in sync, scared that at any moment the schoolteacher would realise the enormity of what she was doing and pull away. This fear, and of course, the strength of her own desires, had her mouth moving enthusiastically against Regina's. And boy, did she taste good, Emma thought, the perfect mix of bitter and sweet, she didn't think she could ever get enough.

It was only when Regina's hand snaked it's way onto the teenager's bare waist, having bunched up her t-shirt around her body, that Emma began to feel confident that the other woman wasn't just going to pull away and leave her hanging. Regina's lips broke contact with Emma's for the first time in minutes and traced down her jaw and on her neck, sometimes barely touching and other times latching on for dear life. The blondes hair tickled her face as she burrowed into her neck, and her light, cherry smell intoxicated Regina.

"Are you okay?" she murmured against Emma's skin.

Emma nodded weakly before finding her voice, "Yes," she whispered as Regina stopped kissing her neck and bought her face up to level to her own, "More than okay, I think," she breathed, blushing and grinning sheepishly.

Regina smiled, biting her lip, "Good," she whispered, somewhat breathlessly.

Belle knocked on her second window for that night until the curtains pulled back to reveal her shocked girlfriend, who quickly unlocked the window.

"Belle?" she said sleepily, "It's like 4am, what the hell?"

Belle clambered in through the window clumsily, refusing Ruby's hand, standing up straight before her as she got through.

"I'm sorry, Ruby," Belle said earnestly, before taking a deep breath, "We have to break up."

Ruby's eyes widened; well, that sure as hell had woken her up. She swept a hand through her long hair.

"What?" she simply said, shocked at her own loss of words.

"We have to – "

"I heard you, Belle, but what the fuck?" Ruby asked, "Where is this coming from? Everything's been fine, I thought we were getting alone great and – "

"We were, we are, _you're_ great. I'm not, I'm not good enough – "

Ruby frowned deeply, "What? You are, you're amazing, what – " she stopped dead in her tracks, looking at the ashamed looking girl before her as something in her brain clicked, she bit her tongue a moment, calming herself down, "What did she do, Belle?" she asked, trying to rid emotion from her expression.

Belle shook her head, "Nothing, - "

"Bullshit, what the hell else would it be?" Ruby asked exasperated, "Did she make a move on you? Confess her love?"

"No," Belle claimed, a little louder than she meant to, "She wouldn't do that – "

"Well, then what – "

"I did," Belle was nearing hysteria now and took a shuddering breath, "I pulled the move. I told her I loved her and I wanted to be with her. Then I kissed her."

Ruby felt the tears well in her throat but swallowed them down and she ground her teeth, "Did she kiss back?' she asked quietly.

Belle took a moment to answer, "Yes."

"Did you fuck?" Ruby almost sneered as the other woman flinched at the crassness of the question.

"No," Belle exclaimed, "God, I wouldn't do that."

"Well, you wouldn't with me but I bet if she asked, you'd be naked in less than a second," Ruby shot back at her girlfriend.

Belle looked hurt, eyes milky, "I'm sorry, Ruby. I can't take it back, it's done – "

"How far did you go?" Ruby pushed.

Belle was getting annoyed but knew she had no right to be, "We didn't do anything, we kissed okay?"

"Standing up or lying down?" Ruby asked coldly, crossing her arms.

Belle threw up her hands, "God, Ruby, what does that matter?"

"It matters," Ruby replied, sharply.

"Fine," Belle snapped, "We were standing up, I kissed her, she kissed back, I pulled her over to the bed and lay down and pulled her on top of me. I put my hands on her waist, under her shirt and she did the same. We kissed a while. Is that enough fucking detail for you?" she was crying now.

Ruby looked away, breaking eye contact, "I was always just second best, wasn't I?"

"No, Ruby, you weren't," Belle's eyes were pleading for the other girl to believe her, "I thought my feelings for her were gone. I swear, I would never have been with you if I didn't think I was over her. I really thought…"

Ruby scoffed, "Belle, as long as she's in your life, you'll never be over her. You're right, we have to break up. Can you go now? You can use the front door," she stepped aside, arms still crossed.

Belle stood for a few moments before nodding, pausing briefly at the bedroom door, "I really am sorry, Ruby," she said quietly, before making her way to the front door.

Emma was burrowed into the older woman's chest, eyes closed contentedly as she felt a hand move through her hair.

"I like the way you do that," she whispered, biting her lip.

Regina smiled, "Your hair is so soft," she murmured, adjusting her head on the pillow and pulling Emma closer. She didn't care about all those now seemingly petty worries she had earlier, this felt right.

Emma squirmed as her phone buzzed in her pocket, turning on her side to pull it out and see Belle's number flashing on the screen.

"It's Belle," she propped herself up on an elbow, looking to Regina for advice.

Regina studied the blonde's face, etched with worry and fear, "She's still your friend, dear… Would she call you if it wasn't important, after the night you've just had?"

Emma nodded slowly as a text flashed up on her screen from Belle; _I broke up with Ruby. _Emma frowned and jumped off the bed in record speed, "You're right. I have to go see her."

"Now?" Regina asked, "It's barely 6, honey, do you want me to drive you?"

Emma shook her head, "No, no, that's fine. I'm sorry to leave so quickly…" she looked back at the brunette in her pyjama's in bed and felt a pang of guilt.

Regina sat up on her knee's and pulled the teenager close to her once again, "Don't apologise for being a good friend," she reached up, touching Emma on the cheek with her hand before she followed with her lips, "Take as long as you need, we can talk when you get back."

Emma nodded, squeezing Regina's hand before she left, she should change her jeans, having slept in them, but it wasn't something that was on her mind as she tapped out a quick message to Belle and headed out the front door.

The blonde teenager made quick work of the ladder, the way she always had, and found herself in the girl's old tree house, looking at her friend curled up in a corner, distraught.

"Belle," she said quietly.

Belle looked up at her friend, wiping tears from her face, "You came."

Emma crawled over to her friend, "Of course I came, Belle. I'll always come," she pulled her friend into her arms.

"I thought you might hate me," Belle whispered.

Emma squeezed tighter, "Never. I could never hate you, Belle."

"Friendship first?" Belle asked tentatively.

"Always," Emma replied reassuringly, "God, Belle, I'm sorry if I've hurt you, you know I never, ever want to hurt you – "

"I know, Em," Belle pulled back and looked at her friend, "It's okay. I mean, it will be, we will be."

Emma nodded, "What happened…with Ruby?"

Belle put her head in her hands for a moment before she leant back against the wall beside her friend, "I told her what happened."

Emma nodded, "I figured… Did you tell her everything?"

Belle raised her eyebrows, "You mean, that we kissed? Yeah. I mean, as soon as I told her that she got so…mean, and it's not like I can be mad at her for that, I cheated on her – "

"What do you mean she got mean?" Emma asked, her defences sparking up inside.

Belle shrugged, "She asked if we…had sex, but you know in Ruby language, and said…" she shook her head, "I said I wouldn't do that and she said that if you asked I would be naked in less than a second," the brunette blushed, "And she just kept pushing and asking how far it went."

Emma blinked, feeling her fists clench; she could imagine Ruby being a crass bitch and that kind of thing had always made Belle uncomfortable, "She shouldn't have…I mean, she was just upset, Belle."

"She had every right to," Belle shrugged again, "I guess it's just us again, huh?"

Emma smiled, "Yeah," she nodded, "I mean, fuck," she swore, "Belle, after you left, I kinda… well, I told Regina I like her. And we kind of…kissed," she felt like she was tearing her own heart out, saying this, "I don't know if I should have waited to tell you but I don't want to lie to you, and you're my best friend and no girl, or woman, or any amount of space will ever get between us."

Belle's eyes widened, "Did she kiss you back?"

Emma nodded weakly, "Yeah, she says she likes me too… And, I don't know, we made out for a while…"

"I interrupted?" Belle asked, hanging her head, "Jeez, Em, you were hooking up with the Spanish teacher and you left – "

Emma laughed quickly, "It doesn't matter," she bumped into her friend, "You're my best friend, Belle. And Regina will be there when I get back, she said we'd…talk."

"You should go back to her," Belle encouraged, "I'm okay, besides I need to get home before my parents notice I'm gone."

Emma was sceptical, "I'll walk you home," she offered and Belle rolled her eyes, "How about I come over for lunch, I'll pick us something up and we can have a movie marathon."

Belle smiled at her friend, "Thanks, Em. You really are the best."


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Thanks for the continued support guys! Love hearing from you and have taken in a suggestion here and there Hope you all enjoy this chapter, it leads up to something I've been wanting to write for a while which will happen next chapter, though I'm a tad nervous about it tbh, but we'll see how it all goes down! **

"You weren't long," Regina noted as the blonde slipped in the front door.

"No," Emma shook her head, "Belle has to get back home before her parents realise she's gone, they're really strict."

"Is she okay?" Regina asked, genuine concern in her eyes.

Emma bit her lip as she nodded, "Well, I think so. I mean, her and Ruby broke up, so she's upset…but she's strong so she'll be okay."

"And you two?" Regina questioned, her eyebrows raised.

"I think we'll be okay," Emma smiled, "We always said we were friends first, and it might be hard for a while I guess, but I think we'll get through it."

Regina smiled, "I'm sure you will, you're both very mature for your age…" she trailed off.

Emma frowned, wondering if that had bought earlier events to mind for the teacher, "So, um, you're cooking," she noted, nodding to the eggs on the stove, "Are you stressed?"

Regina played with the eggs, "No, honey, I'm not stressed," she claimed, "I just thought you might be hungry when you got in…" she paused, "I mean, I'm a little anxious, I suppose," she admitted with a small smile.

Emma shifted from foot to foot, feeling that same anxiousness, "Because we…because…well, because of-of me?" she finished weakly.

Regina watched the teenager struggle for words and adjusted the stove, walking out from behind the bench to close the gap between the two of them, "Emma, I do not regret kissing you," she said firmly.

Emma smiled weakly, "Oh."

Regina smiled back and put a hand through blonde hair before settling it on her face, "I suppose I was anxious about the conversation we now have to have."

Emma nodded, "Oh," she repeated, "Because…it can't happen again?"

Regina looked disappointed, "Well…I-I hope it can happen again," she chewed on her bottom lip.

Emma's face lit up, "Really?" she practically beamed, making the older woman laugh, "I mean, you're still my teacher…"

Regina groaned, "I know. And a part of me wishes I could wait until the end of the school year, but I don't know that I can…or that I want to. I mean, you're eighteen, right? You're an adult – "

"You don't have to justify it to me," Emma cut in, smiling.

Regina laughed briefly, "Sorry," she muttered, "I mean, we have to be discreet, obviously – "

"So I can't kiss you at school?" Emma teased.

Regina glared at the young teenager, "No, you can't. And you can't tease me, either."

"You've been teasing me all year," Emma muttered, "Walking around in those tight dresses, speaking Spanish and being all sexy – "

Regina rolled her eyes, "I've been trying to teach you Spanish, silly girl, not seduce you with it. In all seriousness," she cleared her throat, "You know I would lose my job…"

"I know," Emma stopped smiling, "I know. Are you sure you want to do this?" she looked at her feet.

Regina moved closer again to the girl, "Yes, I am sure," she said sternly, "Are you sure you want to be with someone so…old?"

Emma snorted, "You're not old, Regina," she shrugged, "Plus, the older woman thing is pretty hot," she mumbled, gaining another eye roll from the teacher.

"Yeah, yeah… " Regina sighed, "And you know, whatever we are, I will always, always help you," she looked the blonde in the eye as she spoke, "You are very important to me, dear, and not just because I have these romantic feelings for you."

Emma blinked slowly, brow furrowed as she watched the older woman. She tilted her head slightly. "You really care," she realised slowly.

Regina nodded, "Yes, I really do," she pulled the teenager into an embrace and kissing her hair, "Please, don't ever forget that."

"Oh, hey Em," Belle turned from her front door to see her friend waiting on the street for her.

"Hey," Emma smiled back, "Thought I'd walk you," she shrugged.

Belle smiled, "Thanks… Today is gonna suck," she sighed.

Emma nodded, "I know… You still haven't heard from her?"

Belle shook her head, "Not a word, you?"

"Nope," Emma shrugged again, "At least you don't have any classes with her, huh?"

"Thank god for that," Belle agreed, "Ugh, we can't even get something for lunch at Granny's, this sucks so bad."

"Cafeteria food, yuck," Emma stuck her tongue out, "Are you still grounded? I downloaded a bunch of movies the other day I thought we could watch, if you're not."

Belle looked at her friend, frowning, "I'm still grounded," she said sadly, "I can't believe they caught me sneaking in, I suck at this cloak and dagger bullshit, guess you didn't teach me so well, after all."

Emma smiled, "It's easier to sneak out when nobody gives a shit where you are. You're lucky your folks care, Belle."

"You know, Em, you don't have to take care of me, all the movies and stuff… I'll be okay."

Emma nodded, "I know you will, but it's what friend's do. I know Ruby was your first real girlfriend…and I know everything's been so intense lately…"

Belle grimaced, "Yeah, oh well, exams in a few weeks so study will keep me busy, anyway. Have you started studying yet?"

Emma laughed, "Oh come on, it's nearly a month away, as if."

Belle shook her head, "Em, you really should. You came back to pass, right?"

The blonde sighed, "Yeah, I know," she sounded deflated.

"When are you seeing that psych again?" Belle questioned.

"Oh, tomorrow actually," Emma remembered, "Hey Belle…you know…" she shook her head, "Forget it," she mumbled.

Belle watched her friend closely, "What is it?"

Emma shook her head, "It's nothing," she faked a smile, "Forget about it."

The brunette rolled her eyes; as if she couldn't spot her own best friend's fake smiles, "Okay, talk to me about it when you're ready then," she shrugged.

Emma tried to turn away from her locker; she could just forgot her books for Spanish, right? Regina would understand later when she explained, but it was too late.

"Emma," Ruby's voice sounded behind her and she spun around.

"Ruby," she said a little defensively, not knowing what the long-haired brunette was going to throw at her.

"How's things?" Ruby asked casually; too casually.

Emma sighed; she'd rather Ruby just yell at her than this pleasantries bullshit, "Busy," she shrugged, "You?"

"What, you mean in between getting dumped by my girlfriend and betrayed by my friend?" Ruby said scathingly.

Emma bit her tongue, reminding herself not to lash out – Ruby had the right to be the pissed off party here, "Look, Ruby, I'm sorry for what happened, okay? Honestly, I am, and how it happened, it sucked okay? I get that, but I never meant to hurt you."

"You knew how she felt about you," Ruby spoke quietly now.

Emma frowned, "No, I didn't. I mean, I knew last year, but I thought when she got with you, she was over me – "

"You're not stupid," Ruby snapped, "You encouraged it, always being all touchy with her, you're not like that with anyone else, punching me because you were jealous… and then you reject her again? Or has that changed? Are you two together now?"

"Fuck, Ruby, we're not together. And I wasn't jealous, I just get…protective, she's my best friend – "

"Keep telling yourself that, Em, but you were right about one thing. You don't deserve her."

Emma clenched and unclenched her fists and turned to walk away, "Whatever, Ruby."

"So how long does it go on for? You just string her along until one day, you realise you don't have anyone else in your life cause you're too fucking anti-social to make friends, and she's the only fuck you'll ever get. You're so messed up you'll make her wait for years and get so frustrated that she's begging you for it. Oh hang on, she already is, I – "

That was when fist connected with jaw and both teenager's tumbled to the ground.

"You piece of shit," Emma was yelling, "You don't know a thing about me or Belle," she hit Ruby again.

Ruby wasn't a great fighter, but she had size on her side and managed to push Emma off and get a fist into her jaw while the students gathered around them, jeering the two old friends. Emma knew she should have stopped, but she dived at Ruby and hit her again before she pulled her up and had her against the wall by her throat.

"Go on, do it," Ruby sneered, "We all know you're gonna end up in jail one day anyway."

Emma could feel her every fibre leaving her control and the rage taking over as she tightened the grip she had on Ruby's throat until she started to fight back.

"Alright, what's going on here?" Miss Blanchard made her way through the crowd, followed by Regina, who stopped in her tracks seeing the scene before her.

Miss Blanchard had reacted more quickly and had a struggling Emma in her arms, trying to calm her down. Regina panicked and headed straight to the blonde, taking an arm.

"I have this, Miss Mills," Miss Blanchard claimed, still trying to hold the flailing teenager.

"With all due respect, I think I get along with Miss Swan a tad better than you, why don't you let me handle this?" Regina replied icily.

Miss Blanchard looked at her for a moment before she sighed and released the teenager, who Regina quickly got a hold of and dragged into an empty classroom with difficulty as Miss Blanchard checked on Ruby.

"Emma, please, calm down," Regina was still trying to restrain the blonde as she kicked the classroom door shut, "Honey, it's over, please, you need to settle down."

Emma was crying now and still trying to push the older woman off of her.

"Honey, please," Regina begged, "Stop."

"Just let me go," Emma cried.

"If I let you go, will you calm down?" Regina asked.

Emma nodded silently.

Regina was reluctant, but stayed close to the teenager as she let her go. Emma immediately turned to the wall beside her and smashed a fist into it.

"Emma," Regina grabbed her hand, examining it until Emma fell into her chest, sobbing and apologising, "Shh, honey, it's alright. It's okay, you're safe," she whispered into blonde hair, "I think I should get you home, sweetheart."

"Are you sure you're okay to stay with her?" Regina was anxious about leaving the teenager, who was now sleeping peacefully on the couch.

"I'm sure," Belle answered, "It's okay, I've seen her like this before, we'll be fine. She'll probably sleep a while anyway."

Regina nodded as she picked up her bag, "Okay, I've only got one class after lunch so I shouldn't be too much more than an hour and a half…and you have my number if you need to call, please do."

Belle nodded, "It's fine, really. Don't stress. We'll be fine," she repeated, trying to reassure the other woman.

Regina nodded though she still looked anxious, "Okay," she swept a hand through her hair as she found her keys, "Thank you, Belle."

Belle smiled back as the woman left. She looked at her friend, curled up on the couch, breathing lightly; it was always fascinating to Belle how she could turn from so violent and worked up and then just collapse in a heap like this.

When she slept, she looked so relax and comfortable; there was none of that angst, that fear, that burden that she carried with her in her waking hours… Belle just wished she could be like that when she was awake, but it was like the minute she cracked her eyes open all the walls and pain emanated from her very core.

Belle sighed and pulled a book out of her bag, settling on the armchair next to the couch and opening her novel, casting her glance to her friend every so often.

It wasn't for another hour that Emma finally stirred slowly. Her eyes felt unfocussed as she blinked against the light; when did she get home anyway? And since when did she sleep on the couch? She yawned as she swept the sleep out of her eyes and saw Belle reading in the armchair intensely. She smiled, only her friend could become so absorbed in a story like that.

But why was she here anyway? Where was Regina? What had… She groaned, remembering the fight she'd gotten into with Ruby.

"You're awake," Belle spoke softly, closing her book having heard her friend groan, "Are you okay?"

Emma shrugged, "I'm alright. What happened?"

Belle frowned, "You don't remember?"

"I remember getting into a fight with Ruby and Miss Blanchard and Regina coming… then, not so much," Emma looked to her friend for answers.

Belle shook her head, "Well, Regina managed to sort of calm you down, but you were really worked up, Em, you kept punching things," she took Emma's hand in her own and looked at her red and scratched knuckles sadly, "She got you to her car and then she called me from your phone and we bought you back here. As soon as we were through the front door, you got sleepy and you just collapsed on the couch. She had to go teach, but she shouldn't be much longer," she looked at the clock.

Emma nodded, "Oh," she simply said.

"You haven't snapped like that in a long time, Em, it kind of scared me," Belle said quietly.

The blonde looked at the worry etched on her friend's face, "I'm sorry, Belle," she started, "I didn't mean to scare you. I don't know what happened, I just got so mad…"

Belle squeezed her friend's hand, "I know," she whispered, "But you can't get in anymore fights, Em, you're gonna get yourself in trouble…"

"She's right, dear."

The two girls looked up to see Regina put her keys down and make her way over to the couch, placing a hand in blonde hair.

"I would hate to see you get yourself into trouble… Or hurt. You need to learn to control yourself – "

"It's not so simple," Emma interjected, leaning her head back on the couch in frustration, "I mean, usually I do control myself, it's just…"

"What did she say that made you snap then?" Regina frowned.

Emma's eyes flickered to an oblivious Belle, but Regina picked up on the look and bit her lip.

"Belle, do you need me to give you a lift home, dear?" she asked.

Belle frowned but she wasn't stupid; she could see the teacher wanted to speak to Emma alone, and maybe that was best for now, she thought.

"No, it's still light, I'll walk, thanks," she smiled, "I'll see you tomorrow, Swan," she kissed her friend on the cheek and squeezed her hand quickly, "Call me if you need to."

"Thanks, Belle," Emma offered a smile back.

"Thank you, Belle," Regina said quietly as the teenager passed her, before turning back to Emma, "What did she say, Emma?" she asked again.

Emma waited until she heard the front door close and even then hesitated, "She was just talking shit about Belle and I. She said I was leading Belle on and one day, I'd end up so alone that I'd just use Belle for…" she trailed off, her shoulders dropping, "She said I was being cruel, like making her want it and denying her until she was begging for it. I would never, ever do that, she's my best friend, I never meant to play with her feelings."

Regina sighed and played with Emma's hair, "I know you wouldn't, honey, Ruby is just heart broken, she's mad and she needs someone to take that out on. You're just an easy target for her right now."

Emma nodded, "I know, I kept trying to tell myself that, but sometimes…the rage just takes over."

Regina moved her hand to Emma's face, "I've never seen you like that before," she said softly.

"She's right," Emma whispered, "I'm going to end up in jail."

Regina's eyes widened, "Ruby said that? Honey, why would she… Does this happen often?"

Emma shook her head, "No, it used to a lot, I guess. I got into quite a few fights, in and out of school, especially when I was drinking, but it hasn't happened for ages," she shrugged.

Regina nodded, her hand still caressing the teenagers cheek, "Okay, well we all relapse into bad habits, that's normal. Anyway, you see your psych tomorrow – "

The teenager let out a groan, pulling herself away from the older woman and putting her head in her hands, "I don't want to go," she said monotonously.

Regina bit down on her lip, "Why not, honey?"

"It doesn't help," Emma refused to look at Regina.

"You've only just started seeing her – "

"I know why it doesn't help," Emma spoke more quietly this time.

Regina frowned and placed a hand on Emma's knee instead, trying not to be too invasive as she spoke slowly, "And why is that, dear?"

Emma pulled her hands away from her face and crossed them tightly across her stomach, as though she were trying to somehow hold herself together, "Because I don't tell the truth."

Regina took a deep breath, "The truth about what?"

"When I was a kid…" Emma started, before she stopped and shook her head as though trying to empty it of evil thoughts, "I never told anyone but Belle…" she finally lifted her eyes to meet the concerned ones of Regina's, "But you really care," she chewed her cheek as she stopped talkling.

"I really care," Regina repeated and brushed a stray hair out of the teenagers face, "You can tell me anything, honey. I love you."

Emma nodded, "I love you too," she mumbled, "It's just hard… But you make me feel so safe," she looked up at the older woman with wide eyes.

"You are safe with me," Regina found herself cradling the teenager in her arms and kissing her hair, "I promise you that."

Emma took a deep breath and began to stutter out the story that she had only ever told one other person.


	10. Finding Safety

**A/N: Trigger warnings for mentions of abuse/self harm. I don't know, I think this is an intense chapter, so I feel like I should give warning of it. I only hope I've done this justice and you enjoy it.**

Chapter 10

"I don't really know how to talk about it," Emma mumbled, nuzzling into the safety of the brunette's arms.

"It's okay, honey. Take your time," Regina whispered, the two of them laying together on the couch, "I'll be here whenever you're ready."

Emma nodded, "I want to tell you…but I'm scared."

Regina kissed her on the forehead, "What are you scared of?"

Emma frowned, "I don't know exactly," she admitted, "Scared maybe you will think less of me… or that I am bad inside."

Regina didn't even realise her jaw was clenched, "No, honey, I would never think that," she delivered firmly, already having a good idea of what Emma was holding in, "Is there any way I can make this easier for you?"

Emma shook her head, "No, I just wish you could read my mind mind so I didn't have to speak."

Regina closed her eyes for a moment; seeing the inner turmoil taking over her girlfriend, "Did somebody hurt you, honey?" she asked, softly, not knowing it was the right thing to do or not, but just thinking, maybe if she could help lead the conversation it might make the teenager more comfortable.

Emma's entire body went tense but she forced herself to nod.

"When you were a child?" Regina asked.

Emma was silent for a moment before she turned further into Regina's chest, "I was just a little kid," she said in a tone mixed with anger and sadness, "Five maybe. I didn't know…it was wrong, it just happened all the time and I thought it was normal."

Regina's heart broke at the crack in Emma's voice, "Who hurt you?"

Emma shrugged, "It was just one of my foster family's friends at these stupid family barbecue's they always had. He was older so he was meant to look after me, but…" she shrugged.

"Was it…sexual?" Regina couldn't think of a less direct way of asking and felt the teenager tense again in her arms.

"Yes," she whispered almost inaudibly, "I didn't know it was wrong or weird, I thought it must happen to everyone. There were other kids there, older than me and they knew what happened and never said anything, so I thought it was normal…"

"The other children knew?" Regina blinked, "How old were they?"

Emma nibbled on her lip, "Maybe the youngest was a couple years older than me, the boy who did it was like fifteen, and there was one other guy, his friend the same age …And he knew, because that prick offered me to him, the friend, I mean, once…he said he could do whatever he wanted to me, but the other boy said no," she sighed, "Which is great, but couldn't he have fucking told somebody?"

Regina could feel her own anger boiling over but knew she needed to remain calm, "Is Belle the only person you ever told about this, honey?"

Emma nodded, "I know I should have told an adult, but I didn't know… not until I was older, and by then I was with a different family – "

"How long were you with the other family?" Regina asked.

"Nearly three years," Emma replied quietly, "And we had those stupid parties every month. I wish I could go back with the knowledge I have now and kill him," she spat.

Regina bit her tongue for a moment, "Sweetheart…I am so sorry you grew up like that," she moved a tentative hand to the teenagers face, "I feel very honoured you can trust me enough with your secrets."

Emma sniffed and swallowed hard, "Do you think I'm bad?"

Regina's eyes widened, "No," she said quickly, "No, Emma, you are not bad. You were just an innocent child and _he_ was bad. He is the criminal here, Emma. You did nothing wrong, you grew up thinking this happened to everyone so why would you think to make a fuss of it? You are not to blame in the slightest, darling."

"I don't know…maybe I did something bad to deserve it…" Emma mumbled.

"No, honey, you were a child, you did nothing wrong, do you hear me?" she raised Emma's face so she could meet her eyes as she spoke, "Bad things happen to good people, and it is fucked up, but it is never, ever the child's fault, I promise you."

"It's why I'm so weird though, isn't it?" Emma asked.

Regina frowned, "You mean, why you're ill?"

Emma shrugged, "And weird. I mean, it's why I zone out so easily, they say abuse victims learn to do that and it can carry on throughout their life, so now, if I get scared or something then I feel my head just…go somewhere else, somewhere safe."

Regina nodded, "That makes sense, it's why you can disconnect from class so easily, I would guess."

"And my moods only started to be messed up when I hit puberty and realised that all that stuff hadn't been normal…and I told Belle, and she said that never happened to her, so I started to think I must be bad, or strange. That's when I started getting into fights, I just had all this anger built up inside and I didn't know how else to express it so I'd start fights and get into trouble."

Regina composed herself despite the anger she was feeling on behalf of the teenager, "It makes sense for you to be angry, honey. You have every right to be, but it's not healthy to hold on to that anger."

Emma nodded, "I know, I thought I'd gotten better at controlling it, until yesterday… I used to just punch when I got flashbacks, but then I guess it turned into a habit or something…"

"Do you get flashbacks very often?" Regina asked.

Emma shrugged, "Not so much anymore, I guess. It goes through phases I guess. I used to get them a lot though," she frowned, "That's when I started to cut," she mumbled, "It was like…a distraction I guess, the pain…stopped the flashbacks. I don't know, it just seems to have influenced so much of my life."

"That's why you think it might help the doctor's join the dots," Regina guessed, nodding.

Emma tilted her head, "Don't you think so?"

Regina nodded slowly, "I think so, dear. Mental illness is complicated, I won't pretend to be an expert, but I would think something such as abuse could trigger or accentuate it… I would think it would certainly be worth mentioning to someone."

Emma nodded, "It's so hard to talk about," she said quietly.

Regina took Emma's hand and squeezed it, "I know, honey, but you've done so well with me. I am so, so proud of you."

"You're the first adult that ever wanted to understand me," Emma murmured, bringing her hand connected with Regina's to her face and kissing the older woman's hand, "You're the only place I really feel safe."

Regina squeezed her hand harder, "You're amazing, sweetheart, I don't think you have any idea just how much you inspire me with your strength. I truly think you're incredible."

Emma felt the tears sting her eyes and let a few fall as she burrowed into Regina's chest, "Thank you," she mumbled, "Is it okay if I sleep now?"

Regina smiled as she put a hand in the teenagers hair, "Of course it is, honey. Let's get you to the bed though," she picked up Emma without too much difficulty and carried her to the bedroom, smiling at the way Emma's eyes were already fluttering; she knew it must be emotionally exhausting for her to open up like that. She lay the girl onto the bed and pulled the covers up tight around her, before she crawled in next to her and kissed her on the cheek, before letting her own eyes close.

"Are you going to be okay going to school today?" Regina asked concernedly as she cooked breakfast.

Emma shrugged, "I'll be okay," she said, trying but failing to be convincing.

Regina frowned, "Okay, you come and find me if you need to, dear."

Emma smiled, "I will," she answered.

"And if you see Ruby?" Regina asked tensely.

Emma chewed her tongue a moment, "I'll just walk away," she mumbled.

Regina nodded, "Good," she smiled encouragingly, "Now eat," she handed the teenager a plate.

Emma smiled, "Thanks," she replied as she took the plate. With anyone else it might annoy her, but she relished in the way Regina was so keen to take care of her. It was nice.

"Swan, wait up," Belle caught up to her friend breathlessly, giving her a quick hug after pulling her friend's earphones out, "You're going to go deaf, you know," she half lectured, half joked.

Emma shrugged, "Yeah, yeah," she mumbled, "Hey, you haven't mentioned Columbia since…the other night. You _are_ going, right?"

Belle threw her bag on the table in the café and shrugged, "I don't know, Em. I just don't think I'm ready to leave… This place is my home."

Emma sighed, "I get that, Belle. I know you feel safe here but this is an Ivy league education, your dream."

Belle contemplated for a moment before mumbling sadly, "What will I do without you though? You know, I'm too quiet to make friends. I'll just be lonely."

Emma tilted her head; she knew Belle could be insecure, but it had been a long time since she'd heard those insecurities aired, "Belle," she said gently, "You can make friends. I mean, you're shy, sure but once people get to know you, they'll see how awesome you are."

Belle smiled gratefully, "Thanks, Em. But I don't know…"

"Belle, seriously, you'll be great. You can join a club or something, worst case," she joked, "A book club," she teased.

"Oh shut up," Belle pushed her friend gently, "I do more than just read, you know."

Emma grinned, "I know. But I'll visit you like, always," she said earnestly, "I'm scared too," she admitted, biting her bottom lip.

Belle nodded, "You are?" she asked.

Emma shrugged, "Of course I am, Belle. I mean, we spend so much time together and talk about everything, and I mean, before Ruby, it was just us since we were like nine," she paused, "But we're growing up, I guess… We can't be so…dependent on one another forever."

Belle nodded sadly, "I know," she whispered, "But maybe, I could just go to community college for a while."

"Belle, no," Emma insisted, "You've wanted to go to Columbia since you were a kid, you got in, this is a good thing."

"Hmm," Belle mused, "Why are you pushing me so hard?" she half-whined.

Emma smiled, "Because you'd do the same for me."

Belle sighed heavily, "That's true," she grimaced, "I know you're right," she admitted, "But I hope you guys have a spare room because I'm going to visit all the time."

Emma's face lit up, "Totally. You're gonna do great, Belle, you really are. And we can talk on the phone all the time and visit and hey, you can show me all around New York."

Belle let her lips curve upwards, "Yeah, I can," for the first time since they'd talked about Columbia, her eyes shone with excitement, "And you'll call if you need me, right?"

"Of course," Emma replied, "And you know I'm safe with Regina, right? I mean, she's really good for me, and to me."

The brunette nodded, "Yeah, I know, she seems really good with you, Em."

Emma blushed slightly as she smiled, "She is," she paused, "And hey, um, I told her last night about the abuse," she continued quietly.

Belle's eyes widened, "You did?" she asked, unable to hide her surprise, "That's really good, Em. That must have been hard for you, I'm proud," she took Emma's hand and squeezed it.

Emma offered a small smile, "Thanks, Belle. It was good, I guess, to talk to someone else about it. It kind of got it off my chest, I guess. Plus, she's so easy to talk to… She's going to come to my appointment today," she shrugged.

"So, you're going to tell your psych?" Belle questioned.

"I don't know, maybe. Regina says if I feel up for it, I should, but she says there's no pressure. I think she realises how hard it is to talk to about and that it's all going to take some time, but hey, I feel stronger when she's around, so who knows? Maybe I will."

"You did so well, sweetheart," Regina squeezed the teenager around the shoulders before hopping into the car.

"I'm sorry," Emma mumbled as she took her seat, buckling her seatbelt.

Regina looked surprised, "What for?"

"I didn't tell her," the blonde replied, eyes downcast.

Regina's eyebrows shot up, "Honey, that's okay. It's not an easy thing to talk about, I don't expect you to just be able to tell anyone, you've only had a couple of sessions with this woman, you're doing great," she squeezed Emma's hand gently.

Emma bit her lip nervously, "You always make me feel stronger, Regina," she said shyly, but earnestly.

"I'm glad," Regina replied, leaning over to plant a quick peck on the teenagers lips, "Now, how about take away on the couch?"

Emma nodded, "Yes, that sounds perfect. Thank you for coming in with me. I've never felt this way about anyone."

Regina couldn't help the grin on her face, "Mm, you're so precious," she murmured, "My little princess."

Emma blushed, her teeth on her bottom lip, "Well then, you're my queen."


	11. Too Much

**A/N: This chapter gets very intense, but I feel it needed to be done and I only hope I've done the situation justice. Thank you so much for all the reviews, I try to reply to most of them when possible (I can't reply to guests though!) Trigger warning for self harm/suicide attempt/blood. **

Chapter 11.

Belle stared at her ex-girlfriend, trying to be discreet as she pretended to rifle through her locker. She sighed; this was pathetic, she thought, and closed her locker approaching the brunette.

"Ruby?"

Ruby closed her eyes a moment, recognising the other girl's soft voice, she closed and locked her locker, turning to face Belle, "Belle," she replied, "What is it?"

Belle flinched upon seeing the bruising around Ruby's eye and the split in her lip, "Are you okay?" she asked concernedly, resisting the urge to raise her hand to the other girl's injured face.

Ruby rolled her eyes, "I'm fine."

Belle nodded, "Okay. Look, Ruby," she hesitated, "You can hate me, you're totally justified in that, but please…don't take it out on Emma. She had nothing to do with this, she didn't know how I felt about her so she certainly didn't encourage it or anything… I just…I get that you're mad, but please just take it out on me."

Ruby ran her tongue over her teeth, "Right. So…tell me, Belle, did you give her a lecture about bashing me?"

Belle frowned, "You said some pretty horrible things to her – "

Ruby laughed, "Right, so that justifies her almost killing me? Belle, I don't get how you're so fucking smart but so blind when it comes to her. She was strangling me, and you're giving _me_ the lecture? Open your eyes. She's dangerous."

Belle's frown deepened, "You're right," she whispered, "I'm sorry," she shook her head, "But she's not dangerous, she would never – "

"Never what? Never hurt anyone? Cause my face would disagree with you there. She's hit me more than once and the other day, I thought she might kill me. She gets this look in her eye like… I mean, what the hell is your definition of dangerous if not that? Belle… I worry about you hanging around with her," she finished quietly.

Belle shook her head, "She would never hurt me, Ruby," she insisted, "I don't know, maybe she is dangerous to other people…," she admitted reluctantly, "But that's not who she is. Not really. You know that, you were friends with her."

Ruby shrugged, "I don't know, Belle. Just…be careful."

The bell rung and Belle nodded, giving up and letting Ruby walk away. Ruby swung her bag over her shoulder, turning the corner and running into Emma, who was looking upset; having clearly heard everything.

"Eavesdropping?" Ruby asked defensively.

Emma shrugged, "Ruby… I'm sorry, okay? You're totally right, I'm dangerous," she said softly, "But, I would never, ever hurt Belle. You can't really think that?"

Ruby looked away for a moment, "I have no idea anymore. Whenever I think you're getting better, you do something that makes me doubt that. It's like you have no control sometimes and that does scare me. Is that so wrong?"

Emma shook her head, "No, it's not wrong," she said, refusing to let tears make their way past her throat, "I really am sorry I hurt you, I know I went too far. I never meant to…"

Ruby wasn't oblivious, she could see the pain in her friends eyes and she wasn't so cruel she could just steamroll her feelings, she sighed, "I know you didn't, Emma, but you gotta sort yourself out. I mean, this is school, you get suspended for a week, but we're just about done with school… You're gonna get yourself locked up if you don't learn to control yourself."

Emma nodded, lost in thought, "You're right. I should go," she turned away before glancing back, "I'm sorry about everything, Ruby. I really am."

"Take a seat, Miss Swan," Mr Gold gestured to the seat opposite his desk.

Emma sat, "Okay," she said apprehensively.

"Back from your suspension, I see," he noted.

"Uh-huh," Emma confirmed, her anxiety growing.

"You realise you missed a test in Ms Nova's test this week?" Mr Gold asked.

Emma frowned, "No, how would I know that if I wasn't allowed to come to school? Can't I just resit it?"

The co-ordinator frowned, "You can, I suppose, but your teacher, Ms Nova, has recommended you to repeat her subject in summer school."

Emma blinked as her brain comprehended the information, "No," she said slowly, "I can pass. Let me do the test, I'm not doing summer school."

Mr Gold sighed, "It's not only Ms Nova who has recommended this, Miss Swan. Miss Blanchard says you're on the border of failing her class also."

Emma swore, earning herself a glare from the older man, "I can past English, no worries, I swear. I'll do extra credit work, please. I can't do summer school, I need to graduate."

Mr Gold shook his head, "You got yourself into this situation, Miss Swan, it shouldn't come as a surprise. You're perfectly capable of doing the work, you just don't do it."

"It's not exactly that simple," Emma muttered.

"Well, unless you can convince Ms Nova and Miss Blanchard to pass you in their classes, you will attend summer school, or failing that, repeat the entire year."

Emma clenched her jaw, "I'm not repeating the year."

Mr Gold waved a dismissive hand, "That is all, Miss Swan, speak to your teachers, though it would have helped if you had built stronger relationships with your teachers so they would be more willing to help you at times like these."

Emma rolled her eyes, "Right," she muttered, "Thanks for the good news," she stood up and left the room.

Emma trudged to her English class, lost in thought. She was going to fail out, she knew it. Ms Nova might be willing to help her out, but Miss Blanchard? Ugh, Emma thought, she'd probably relish the fact of writing incompetent on her end of year report.

_This was such a fucking waste_, she thought, and swung her bag off her shoulder, slamming her books into it and zipping it up as she turned and stormed out of the building.

There was no use going to a class she'd already failed with a bitch of a teacher who hated her._ This is fucked, _she thought,_ Belle was off to better things at Columbia. Hell, the rest of her whole year had their future's planned, university's, job's, community colleges. And what the hell was she doing? Trying to get the right medication mix after six years so she could function like a normal human being._

_Pshh, _she snorted to herself_ as she walked the street, normal? She'd never be normal. She'd never be anything. She couldn't even pass high school, how was she going to survive in the real world? Ruby was right, if she pulled half the shit she pulled at school in the real world, she would be locked up._

_Hell, maybe that was what was best for her_, she thought glumly, _and best for those around her._ _Nobody should have to deal with her bullshit, she was just trouble. It was true. _She'd been institutionalised before and she'd hated every second of it. She'd never felt more alone than when she'd been in that place, it had been completely dehumanising.

She unlocked the front door hurriedly, throwing her bag onto the ground roughly. She was worked up and she knew it, she needed to get out of this headspace she was in but it was toxic and it was easier to just stay there. She lay back on the couch and let the negativity wash over her.

Regina frowned as she hung up; she was meant to be meeting Emma after her detention to give her a lift home, but the teenager wasn't answering her phone. She decided to walk past the detention room to see if she was still there, even though she should have been finished ten minutes ago. She tidied up and packed her marking into her bag along with her laptop.

She hoped Emma's first day back after her suspension had gone okay. She knew the teenager was beating herself up about what had happened between her and Ruby, and it did worry Regina that Belle now seemed to be her only friend at school. Their relationship was complicated enough as it was, and now it was back to just being the two of them.

Regina's eyebrows creased together as she saw Miss Blanchard alone in the detention room, she knocked lightly as she entered.

Miss Blanchard looked up, "Regina, what can I do for you?"

"Was Emma Swan in detention this afternoon?" Regina asked.

Miss Blanchard shook her head, sighing, "No, she wasn't. Nor was she in my class fifth period, she really is making it more difficult for herself…"

Regina frowned, "Oh," now she was worried.

"I understand you are trying to help her," Miss Blanchard claimed, "And so I will tell you… she is very close to failing my class, and I believe it's not the only class. I thought Mr Gold was talking to her today, but surely she wouldn't have skipped my class had he told her how close she is to failing out?"

Regina chewed her lip, "Is it possible for her to pass your class? With extra work, or resits, anything?"

Miss Blanchard frowned, "It may be possible but she will have to do quite a bit of extra credit work and even then it will not guarantee her a passing grade. She needs to do well, not just glide through the way she seems to at the moment."

Regina nodded, "I will talk to her," she assured the younger brunette, "I know she wants to graduate, she just needs… she needs people to believe that she can," she finished quietly.

Miss Blanchard's expression softened, "I understand she has had more obstacles than most, Regina, but you know we can't pass students who don't show competency. I know she is more than competent, but she does need to display it."

"I know, I understand. Thank you, Mary Margaret," she turned on heel and walked out the door, bringing out her phone, dialling the teenagers number once again.

Emma held the razor to her skin, her eyes unfocused. Her mind felt numb, yet busy at the same time. There was a tiny voice in the back of her head, telling her to get out of the house, to call Regina or Belle. But the static drowned out that sensible thought. She just felt so…hopeless.

There was nothing she could do to get out of her current predicament; she would fail school, her best friend would move away, Regina would probably realise how pathetic she was and kick her out and then she'd be alone again. _What was the fucking point?_

She had no control over her life, this illness was…everything. It painted everything. She couldn't even control her own stupid mouth and tell that psych woman what was going on. And who knew if it would even help anyway? It would just hurt to talk about, but it hurt to keep inside too. All of a sudden, nothing made sense and she was overcome with absolute despair.

So, Emma let the razor touch her skin, gently at first until she angled it and pulled it up her wrist, flinching only slightly as it pierced the skin. For some reason she couldn't even identify, the sight of the blood made breathing a little easier. She made several more cuts to the skin until the seeping blood was no longer satisfying.

She clenched her teeth and angled her weapon further, gasping as the pain deepened and the blood spilled out. Emma could feel the tears crowding her vision as she made another incision, ignoring her instincts screaming at her to stop, to treat the bleeding but in some kind of sick desperation, she only angled the razor further until she couldn't stand the pain anymore, dropping the instrument by her side and propping her back against the wall, dropping her head onto her knee's.

Was it the tears or the dizziness that made her vision blurry? She wasn't sure until she felt her eyes roll upwards.


	12. Deja Vu

**A/N: Trigger warning - blood, self harm, suicidal talk. Tried to update quickly so I didn't leave you all hanging! Please keep letting me know your thoughts, I love to hear them :)**

Chapter 12.

Regina unlocked the door, now she was really confused and worried, Emma still wasn't answering her phone. She put her bag and keys down, noting Emma's phone on the couch; she was home, good.

"Emma?" she called out as she made her way to the teenagers room, "Honey?" she knocked as she opened the door to an empty room. She frowned and made her way to the bathroom, knocking lightly, "Emma?" Still,no answer. She checked the door, it was unlocked and so she pushed it open.

Regina's mind blanked for a moment before she could take in the scene before her. A bloody razor next to the blonde teenager and blood still spilling from the wounds of her wrist. Emma appeared to be asleep, or passed out, Regina couldn't tell as she fell to her knee's beside the teenager and swiped a towel from the rack beside her and securing it around Emma's wrist. She pulled out her phone, dialling 911.

"Ambulance…my girlfriend, she's cut her wrist, there's blood everywhere and she's passed out," Regina was trying to be calm but the shakiness in her voice and the pain in her throat betrayed her, "I don't know how long ago, I only just got home… " she gave her address and took a few instructions before hanging up.

She placed her hands on the teenagers face, "Wake up, Emma," she demanded, "Please, come on, honey, open your eyes," she tapped the girl's face gently, the tears brimming out over her eyes, "Emma, I swear to god," she grinded her teeth, "I need you to open your eyes."

Emma groaned as her eyelids began to flurry and she swallowed down a dry throat.

"That's it, sweetheart," Regina sighed with relief.

"No," Emma croaked as her eyes opened, "Don't wake me up," she tried to push the older woman away.

"Honey, please," Regina pleaded, "It's okay."

"It's not okay," Emma sobbed, "It's never okay and it's never going to be okay. Go away, please," she tried to take the towel from her wrist but Regina wouldn't let her.

Regina's eyes widened, "No, Emma, you will be okay, I know you will."

"Why did you wake me up?" Emma growled, "God, I can't even kill myself right," she leaned her head back against the wall behind her, tears streaming down her cheeks.

Regina bit her lip, chewing it anxiously, "Honey," she said slowly, "Did you do this to try and kill yourself?"

Emma shrugged, "You should have let me," she choked.

* * *

"Is she going to be okay?" Regina asked the doctor anxiously, as he stitched up her wounds.

He grimaced but nodded, "She'll be fine, physically, but we'll need to keep her in for 24 hours, it's hospital policy."

Regina nodded, "Right," she swallowed, "Can I stay with her?"

The doctor nodded again, "Of course."

Emma remained silent, staring into space as the two conversed. She had hardly spoken a word since the ambulance had bought her in.

"There we go," the doctor smiled, "All done. You did lose a bit of blood, so you may feel low on energy for a while, so feel free to sleep if you wish. A psychiatrist will be up to see you later."

Emma rolled her eyes, "Why? I already see a psych."

The doctor was surprised that the young girl had vocalised for the first time in nearly an hour, "Again, it's policy. We need to be assured that you aren't going to do this again and provide any support that you may need."

Emma just glared at the doctor as Regina thanked him, before he left the room.

Emma turned away from her, pulling the blanket tight around her and closing her eyes.

Regina sighed and put her hand in blonde hair, "Sweetheart," she couldn't keep the hurt out of her voice, "Please don't shut me out."

Emma shook her head, trying to dislodge Regina's hand but the older woman refused to move.

"I know you're mad at me," she started, "But I love you. You know I couldn't just let you…die," her voice cracked on the word, "I'm sorry if you think I was being selfish, but I don't know what I would do without you. Please, look at me."

Emma was grinding her teeth so hard it hurt, "I never should have taken your class," she said quietly.

That stung, "Emma…"

"No, I don't mean… I just mean, if I hadn't…if we hadn't met, I wouldn't have… I'm sorry."

Regina frowned and moved around to the other side of the bed so she could look at Emma's face, "Honey, I don't understand what you're trying to say."

"I'm sorry," Emma mumbled, "I should have run away or something."

"No, you shouldn't have – "

"I'm a bad person," Emma let the lump in her throat take over and allowed a sob to escape, "I'm bringing back all those bad memories for you… your friend…"

Regina's eyes widened; that's what Emma was worried about right now? About the memories this stirred in her about her past? _That_ was what she felt guilty about?

"Emma, you are not a bad person," she said firmly, "Don't you dare beat yourself up for how this affects me, dear. What happened to my friend… yes, sometimes you remind me of her, but that's not something you need to take on. I love you, Emma, and you know I couldn't let you…"

"I know," Emma admitted sadly, "I get it. I just want to go home, I hate hospitals."

Regina smiled sympathetically, "I know, sweetie, but you can't. Not yet," she moved her hand over the young girl's cheek, "But I'm going to stay right here with you," she whispered, "I know it doesn't feel like it, but it's going to be okay."

"I just felt so desperate," Emma whispered, "I can't control anything, I've never been able to and the older I get, the worse it gets. I'm going to flunk out of school," she broke eye contact as she looked down ashamedly.

Regina bit her lip, "Emma, you can pass, you just need to do extra work. And anyway, even if you don't, it's okay. We can figure it out, we just need to sit down and look at the options with a clear head."

Emma looked back up at the brunette, "Maybe," she said unconvincingly, sniffing, "Everything's just moving so fast…"

"I know," Regina said softly, "It's okay, let's not talk about it right now, okay? Can I get you anything, are you hungry or thirsty or – "

Emma's eyes welled up, the tears spilling out, "Can you please just hold me for a while?"

Regina nodded, "Of course," she sat down and pulled the blonde into her chest, stroking her hair for minutes on end until the teenager was breathing lightly. Regina kissed her on the forehead and reached for Emma's phone.

* * *

"Swan," Belle breathed out, taking in the image of sleeping friend in the hospital bed, she looked to Regina, "She's going to be okay, right?"

Regina moved closer to the distressed girl, "She'll be okay," she confirmed softly.

"What happened?" Belle asked as she wiped her eyes.

Regina put an arm around Belle, squeezing her shoulders, "I think everything just…got on top of her, she's failing a couple of her classes, I think it just pushed her over the edge."

Belle nodded, still snivelling, "She's self harmed before… but she hasn't been in hospital in a long time… was she trying to," she paused, biting her trembling lip, "kill herself?"

Regina didn't realise her grip tighten on the young brunette, "Sweetheart," she started, pausing, thinking how best to answer, "I think…yes," she settled on the direct truth, "I think it was a suicide attempt," she whispered and embraced Belle as she turned into her chest, crying her eyes out, "Shh, I know, honey, but she's going to be okay. We're going to get her through this."

Belle pulled away, continuing to wipe her eyes, she nodded, "Okay," she sniffed, "I'm really glad she found you."

Regina's eyes widened, "Thank you," she said softly, "You know she can fight this, Belle, she is a very strong woman."

Belle nodded, "Yeah, I know she is. It's just not fair," she whispered, "She's a good person, why does she have to go through this?"

"I don't know, dear," Regina said sadly, "All we can do is support her."

Belle nodded slowly, "You're right. I'm going to get some water, my head's hurting a little, do you want something?"

"Some water would be great, and why don't you grab Emma some a chocolate bar for when she wakes up? She always love to munch on them when she's down," Regina smiled.

Belle smiled back, "Okay, I'll be right back."

* * *

"Belle," Emma spotted her friend the moment she woke up and cleared her dry throat.

"Swan," Belle stood up and rushed to her side, wrapping her arms around her friend, "I'm so glad you're okay."

Emma returned the embrace, burying her face in her friend's shoulder, "I'm sorry," she mumbled.

Belle sighed, "It's okay, Em," she pulled back and cupped her friends face with her hands, "Please, don't give up," she said, tears shining in her eyes.

Emma bit her lip before looking down, "I'm scared, Belle," she admitted.

"I know you are," Belle nodded, "But just let us help you," she glanced at Regina, "We can do this together."

Emma couldn't help smiling at her friends attitude, "I hope so," she mumbled.

"Good. Hope is important," Belle claimed, "You know I'll do anything for you, right?" she asked wide-eyed.

The blonde nodded slowly, "I know, Belle. I just feel so…lost."

Belle couldn't erase the concern etched on her features, "So, let us in, Em. Let us find you," she whispered.

Emma raised her eyes to meet her friends and pulled her close, burying her head in her chest again, feeling the brunette pull her close and kiss her on top of her head.

"I love you, Em," Belle murmured.

* * *

It wasn't until the next day that the hospital-assigned psychiatrist paid Emma a visit.

"I just need to ask you a few questions to try and figure out where your head is at," the psychiatrist explained.

"Uh-huh," Emma claimed, wishing they'd let Regina stay in the room with her.

"When you cut your wrist yesterday…were you trying to take your life?"

Emma played with the blankets as she chewed her life, "Yes," she said quietly.

The psychiatrist nodded, noting something on his clipboard, "Can you tell me what led to this?"

Emma sighed, "I had some bad news," she shrugged.

"I see. And your living situation, I see you are living with your girlfriend, Regina?" he asked, eyebrows raised.

Emma nodded, "Yeah, that's right," she said nervously; why had Regina said she was her girlfriend and not her teacher to the ambulance workers. She supposed the woman must have been flustered.

"Do you think you will try this again when you are released?"

Emma almost rolled her eyes; as if she'd say yes if she was planning on it, "No," she shook her head, "I just want to go home. Sleep in my own bed. I hate hospitals."

"It says on your file that this is not the first time you have tried to take your own life," the doctor noted.

Emma blinked rapidly, "Well…no. But that was years ago."

"Yes, I can see that, and that was an overdose, I see?"

Emma nodded tiredly, "Yes. But really, I'm okay now, I just want to go home," she insisted.

The doctor nodded, "I know that. Now if you can just give me your psychiatrists contact information, we can try to either get her in to see you or make an appointment as soon as possible. Once that's done, we should be able to release you within a couple of hours."

* * *

Regina unlocked the door and placed her arm around Emma's shoulder as they entered the house.

"Can I get you anything, honey?" Regina asked.

"No, I'm okay," Emma claimed, "I just want to curl up on the couch, watch a movie or something."

Regina nodded, "Of course, sweetheart."

Emma collapsed onto the couch, her eyes heavy with exhaustion. Regina sat down beside her and Emma moved her head into the older woman's lap.

"Any requests?" Regina asked as she turned the television on.

"No, you choose, I'll fall asleep," Emma murmured, already letting her eyes close.

"Alright," Regina said quietly, playing with the remote with one hand and stroking her blonde with the other hand.

"I love you," Emma murmured sleepily.

Regina sighed with contentment at hearing those words from Emma for the first time since she'd found the girl in the bathroom, "I love you too, dear. We're going to fight this together. You are more resilient than anyone I know," she said gently, "My princess."


	13. Building Bridges

**Chapter 13.**

There was a knock on the door and Regina left a sleeping Emma on the couch to answer it to the small brunette who had visited every day since her friend's latest episode.

"Hello, dear," Regina smiled, widening the door to let Belle in, "She's asleep, but come in, would you like some tea?"

Belle smiled back as she nodded, removing her scarf and hanging it up, "Yes, please. How is she?"

Regina led the young girl into the kitchen as she busied herself making the tea, "Hm, she's exhausted, but okay. She did say she's going to talk to her teachers about the extra credit work, so she can graduate. I think it's a good sign she's thinking about the future like that."

Belle nodded, eyes lit up a little at the news, "Really good," she agreed, "May I ask you something, Regina?" she asked quietly.

Regina's brow furrowed in curiosity, "Of course you may, dear."

Belle licked her lips nervously, "I don't know if Emma told you…I got into Columbia," she started.

"She did," the older woman smiled, "That's amazing, Belle, you should be very proud."

Belle smiled shyly, "Thank you. But…I don't think I should go, not now. I mean, even before…this, I wasn't sure I should go but now? How am I meant to leave my best friend when…" she played with the cup Regina had handed her, staring at her hands.

Regina sighed, "I understand, Belle. Really, I do," she chewed her lip, unsure of the advice she was about to give, "I don't know if Emma ever told you…about my friend, in high school?" she quirked an eyebrow at the teenager.

Belle frowned as she shook her head.

"Well…I had a friend, my best friend, Bianca…she was ill, also," Regina started, before pushing a hand through her hair nervously, "She was amazing, she was bright and she could be funny and witty. We spent all our time with one another and of course, I tried to help her as much as I could…but during our final year of high school," she tensed up as the teenager watched her with wide eyes, "she…committed suicide," she closed her eyes for a moment, swallowing hard.

Belle blinked, "Oh. I…I'm so sorry," she said earnestly before nibbling on her lip, "That's why you took such an interest in helping Emma," she guessed.

Regina shrugged, "At first, yes. The education system didn't do much for Bianca, and it wasn't doing much for Emma either, so I thought I could help…" she trailed off.

"And you have," Belle smiled, "She really, really trusts you. I've never seen her the way she is with anyone, especially an adult. I mean, she has no real family but I think she found some semblance of it with you."

Regina's heart warmed at those words, "Thank you. Now, regarding your university, have you spoken about this to Emma?"

Belle shrugged, "Yes…last week. She'd just convinced me to go, to follow the dream… But, I don't know. How can I leave her when she's just tried to…" she trailed off, unable to say the words.

"What are you planning on studying at university?" Regina enquired.

Belle frowned, "Literature most probably. I think I might want to teach, in high school or maybe higher education, I'm not sure."

Regina smiled, "I think you'd be an excellent teacher, Belle. I will tell you my honest thoughts on the subject, dear," she sighed, "When Bianca passed, everyone in her life wondered what more we could have done. It haunted…and still haunts me from time to time…," she sighed again, "I am certainly not saying you shouldn't chase your dreams. I would never, ever say that. But you're right, Emma is in a very vulnerable state right now and she doesn't have any real family around…" she hesitated, "Columbia will always be there," she finished quietly.

Belle's eyes misted up, "But Emma might not be," she whispered.

Regina pursed her lips, "You know, I will do everything I can to take care of her, no matter what. I want you to be assured of that. I would not judge you for a moment if you decided to leave," she said honestly.

"I know," Belle nodded, "But one person isn't a support network."

Regina rubbed her temples, shaking her head, "I do not want to talk you out of going to university, dear. I am a teacher after all. I mean, you could stay here any time you visited, you are always more than welcome and as often as you would like."

"It's such a long drive," Belle mumbled, "I just want to see her stable…for more a couple of months."

The teacher nodded, "I understand. Perhaps we could research whether Columbia offers any of your units via correspondence…" she mused.

Belle's eyes lit up, "Do you think they do that?"

Regina bit her lip, "I'm not sure about Columbia, but a lot of university's do offer unit's online. You probably couldn't study on a full-time basis, but you could at least get a start. Again, dear, I do not want to influence you either way," she sighed, "But I know I am."

Belle sighed, "It's okay, you're being honest and I appreciate that. I should check the online unit's out though," she said thoughtfully, "It would appease my parents too. I think they would be mad if I didn't study at all."

"Why wouldn't you study?" Emma frowned entering the kitchen area, rubbing her eyes as the two woman turned to face her.

Belle bit her lip, "I don't think I'm going to move, Em. Not now. It's not the right time."

Emma frowned further and looked at Regina before looking back to Belle, "You said the other day… you have to go – "

"Dear," Regina stood up, making her way over to the blonde.

"No," Emma cut in, "You can't support this, Regina. It's her dream, she can't just – "

"Em, you know what my dream is? To see you happy."

"I have Regina," Emma insisted, "You know she'll take of me. You've said how good she is with me, I'll be okay."

"She's just one person, Em. You're my family. It might just be first semester. It will give us some time to get you back on track."

Emma was wide eyed, "That's stupid," she said stubbornly.

Regina sighed and put her hands on Emma's shoulders, "Emma, Belle cares for you. You have just tried to kill yourself. It is natural that she wants to stay. She may be able to study online, so it's not like she wouldn't be moving forward at all. Honey, it's her choice, just let her make up her mind."

Emma chewed her cheek as she took in her girlfriend's words, "I don't want to hold anyone back," she said quietly.

Belle walked up beside Regina, "You're not holding me back, Em," she put a hand on her friend's face, "I'm helping you move forward. That's what family does," she smiled.

Emma hesitated before nodding, "Fine," she whispered, "One semester, okay? Just one semester."

Belle pulled her friend into a hug, "I love you, Swan."

"I love you too, Belle," Emma murmured into her friend's hair.

Emma knocked on the open door lightly to attract her teachers attention.

"Yes, Emma, come in," Miss Blanchard gestured to the seat opposite her as the teenager shuffled over, "Miss Mills has informed me you would like to do some extra credit work, in hopes of passing my subject."

Emma nodded, "If it's possible… I really want to pass. I swear I'll try harder than I have been, I know I haven't done enough and…and I'm sorry for being a pain. It's never been anything personal."

The teacher's eyes widened; she hadn't expected such words from the student, "I appreciate that, Emma," she said honestly, "I suppose some people just clash," she smiled, "But perhaps I have, at times, been too harsh with you. I know you have faced more demons than most… " she sighed, "I think as teachers, we do not have the knowledge to deal with mental health issues and so instead, we ignore them. Clearly, it is not the right way to deal with things. Miss Mills seems to have realised that, and I do plan to follow suit in the future."

Emma blinked slowly; she'd never actually had respect for Miss Blanchard until now, "Wow…that's great. I mean, I think it is important for teachers to have knowledge about mental health stuff, we spend so much of our time here…" she shrugged, "I'm lucky Miss Mills took some time to support me."

The small brunette nodded, "I am glad you are trying, Emma. You have always been more than capable, now, I have the list here of required reading for the state."

Emma took the paper her teacher handed her, "Hang on, these aren't the books we studied though?"

"Some of them are, but this is the list that we as teachers choose the novels from. I am aware that you like reading, so I thought perhaps there would a book there you have already read that you could write on," Miss Blanchard explained.

"Oh," Emma said, "Right. I've read a few of these," she nodded as she continued to scan the list, "So, what do I need to do?"

Miss Blanchard sighed, "With the way your marks at the moment, I would need you to do one analytical essay, a book report and a creative essay. As well as this, you need to score above 70 on the end of year exam. I do not expect this to be an easy task, it is a lot of work, but it is the only way that I can grant you a pass."

Emma chewed her lip, "I see," she sighed as she begun to doubt herself, "That's on top of the rest of the assignments for the year, right?"

"That's right. There is two more standard assignments before the year," Miss Blanchard could see the teenager fighting an internal battle, "I can give you until the end of the year to get all these assessments in, and if I can help in any way please let me know."

"Mhm," Emma mumbled, pushing a hand through her hair as she continued to chew her lip.

"Emma, I do believe you are more than capable than doing the work… It is just the motivation that is going to be your enemy."

Emma nodded, "I'm going to try," she said determinedly, "I really, really want to graduate."

Miss Blanchard smiled, "And you can. That is the only reason I was so…brash with you, Emma. It is very difficult watching students with such potential not utilise it."

Emma looked down, "It probably didn't help I was a little bitch."

Miss Blanchard quirked an eyebrow, "Well, that isn't the word I would have used, but I am glad we have been able to move past that…unpleasant stage of our relationship."

Emma smiled tentatively, "Same," she nodded, "I should go, it's my study period and I have a lot to work."

"Yes, you do. Good luck, Emma," the teacher smiled as the teenager walked out of the room; she'd never expected to actually bond with Emma Swan, but she had come to realise a lot of things over the last few weeks; she was no ice statue and it had saddened her greatly to hear of the teenagers attempt on her own life. It was a teacher's job, after all, to inspire their student's but perhaps, more than that, it should be to support them.

Emma listened to her girlfriend speaking Spanish in front of the class and sighed; this was definitely the thing she had missed the most about school. She didn't know what it was but listening to Regina speak that language just did things to her. The bell rang and she was almost disappointed, but packed her bag slowly as the rest of the class filed out.

"What are you smiling about?" Regina said as she approached the teenager, as her own lips curved upwards.

Emma raised her face to meet her teachers eyes and shrugged sheepishly, "I missed listening to you speak Spanish, it's so…seductive," she licked her lips unconsciously.

Regina chuckled quietly, "Not at school, it's not," she said sternly, though the effect was somewhat lost by the devious smile on her face.

Emma pouted, "Yeah, yeah. Not my fault you're so yummy," she whined.

Regina rolled her eyes, "Silly girl," she teased gently, "Now, tell me quickly, how did you go with Miss Blanchard?"

Emma tilted her head slightly, "It was okay. She was actually really nice. I have to do like three essays on top of my class work and do well in the exam. Plus, I have to do extra work for Ms Nova too, but that's only one report, so I don't think that will be too bad."

Regina nodded, "And, remember, dear, if it doesn't happen, it's okay. You are doing so well, and I will be proud of you whatever happens."

Emma bit back a smile, "I hate not being able to hug you," she mumbled.

Regina hung her head for a moment before she looked back up at the blonde with soft eyes, "Right back at you," she replied gently, "Why don't you meet me here after school and I can bring my marking home, we'll snuggle up on the couch and do our work."

Emma's eyes lit up, "Okay. And you need to help me study for your test next week. My personal Spanish seductress."

Regina rolled her eyes again, "I will, dear, only for my favourite student," she winked, "Now, go and get yourself some lunch, I'm sure Belle is waiting for you."

Emma sighed and nodded, reluctant to leave the company of the older woman, who always made her feel so comfortable, just with her mere presence.


	14. Closer

Chapter 14

"Swan, over here," Belle called out from across the cafe as her friend glanced around, trying to spot her, "Hey," she hugged her friend as she arrived.

"Heya," Emma returned the hug, "You alright?"

Belle bobbed her head, smiling, "Sure. Are you? Did you talk to Miss Blanchard?"

Emma nodded, "Uh-huh, I've got a lot of work to do," she sighed as she sat down, "But hey, she gave me the extensive reading list, so at least I can choose better books."

"Ooh, can I see?" Belle leaned forward eagerly.

Emma laughed at her friends excitement, "You dork," she teased as she rifled through her books until she found the list and handed it over, "I haven't had a full look at it yet, but there were a few I'd read already, so I guess that helps."

"Yep, yep, yep, yep, twice, yep, yep, yep," Belle muttered as she ticked off the books she had read.

Emma giggled, "Such a bookworm," she teased, "At least you can help me, huh?" she nibbled her bottom lip nervously.

Belle looked up from the list, "Of course I can."

Emma smiled, "Thanks, Belle. How are you, anyway? I feel like I kind of stole the thunder... I mean, you just broke up with Ruby and - "

"Em, don't worry about it," Belle shrugged, "I mean...it was the right thing, with Ruby. I'm obviously not ready to be in a relationship. I guess what sucks more is losing her as a friend... She must hate me," she finished quietly.

Emma frowned, "I don't think she hates you. She's just hurting, but hey, maybe in time you guys can talk again. I miss her too."

The bell sounded and both girls sighed as they packed up their belongings and began walking through the halls.

"I've got study period, I better go to the library, try and get my head around all this work," Emma stated, "I'll see you later, Belle."

"Good luck. See you, Em," Belle smiled as she gave her a friend a wave before turning down a separate corridor.

* * *

Emma headed to the library, dragging her feet. She was tired, but she knew she needed to at least get a start on this heavy workload. She groaned internally, realising she wouldn't even get relief when the day was over as she would be studying at home too. At least that would be a little more bearable with Regina by her side, though also incredibly distracting, she thought with a small smile to herself. She could think of a way or two that Regina would be able to help...motivate her.

No, she told herself, don't think about that now or your mind will never get onto this assignment. She shook her head, trying to empty it of thoughts of Regina as she turned down the corridor leading to the library.

"Emma!" Quick footsteps accompanied the familiar voice.

The blonde turned around nervously as Ruby caught up to her, puffing slightly, "Hey," she tapped her fingers against her leg anxiously; she was not in the mood for another argument.

Ruby stared at her friend for a moment, "So... Dr Whale told Granny you were in hospital...that you'd tried to..." she stuttered, "I guess, he didn't know we weren't talking, I'm sure he shouldn't have told Granny but you know, we're...or we were like family," she realised she was rambling, "Are you okay?"

Emma blinked, "Um," she swallowed, noting the genuine concern in her friends eyes, "I'm okay," she said weakly.

Ruby licked her lips uncomfortably shifting from foot to foot, "Are you sure? I'm sorry I wasn't there for you."

"You are?" Emma said, dumbfounded.

Ruby's eyes widened, "Of course I am... Em, you're my friend. I mean, everything that happened...it sucked, and it still sucks, but it doesn't mean I don't care about you guys. It doesn't mean I want you to...to..."

Emma chewed her lip, "Thanks, Rubes," she said softly, "I've missed you."

Ruby smiled in relief, "I've missed you too," she admitted, "I mean, we were all so tight before... I know it's not your fault for what happened with Belle, it was stupid to blame you. I'm sorry."

Emma flinched, "Please, don't apologise. I mean, I really hurt you... But you're right, I've got to get my temper under control," she shrugged.

"You know... even if we're not talking or whatever, you can call me any time... if you need to. If you feel like...that," Ruby sighed, "I just want you to know I'd be there for you."

Emma nodded, "Thanks, Rubes," she smiled a little, "I guess we can't just go back to being friends like before, huh? Things are different now."

Ruby teased her hair with her fingers, shrugging, "Things are different," she agreed, "But, I mean... I miss you guys. I don't know if we can go back to how it was before... But, we could try, right?"

Emma nodded, her smile growing, "Sure, I'd like that. I know Belle would too."

Ruby smiled slyly, "You must miss Granny's cooking, huh?"

Emma nodded sheepishly, "Yeah, I guess we've kinda boycotted Granny's lately...Other than breakfast sometimes..."

"Cause you know I'm not there," Ruby cut in.

The blonde shrugged, "Yeah. So, dinner tomorrow?"

Ruby hesitated before she grinned, "Yeah, sure. At 6? You really think Belle would wanna see me? I was kinda...mean to her."

Emma frowned, "I know she would, Rubes. I think we've all been kinda...mean to one another lately. Hey, I better head off, I've got a tonne of work to do, but I'll text you."

Ruby nodded, "Sweet," she moved closer to her friend and pulled a surprised Emma into her arms, "I do love you, Em," she whispered into her hair, "Please remember that."

* * *

"You're tired, dear, take a break," Regina said gently, placing a hand on blonde hair.

Emma looked up at her, "I've got so much to do," she mumbled, "I can't afford to take a break."

Regina pulled the corner of her lip into her mouth, "Honey, I know you have a lot to do, but I don't want you to push yourself too hard. You need to give your brain a rest every now and then, or you'll burn yourself out."

Emma rolled her eyes, "You're such a teacher."

Regina narrowed her eyes, "Is that meant to be an insult?"

The teenager grinned with a devious sparkle in her eye, "Nope," she shrugged, "You know I like teacher's."

This time Regina rolled her eyes, "Yes, dear, I know. Sometimes I wonder if I'm just filling in some kind of fantasy or fetish of yours."

Emma pouted, "No way," she placed a hand on the older woman's cheek, "It's just an added bonus that you're a sexy Spanish teacher."

Regina leaned into the warm hand on her face, "Mm, I'm glad," she murmured, "You're schoolgirl crushing is pretty adorable."

Emma blushed, "Your eyes are shining," she said quietly.

"That's because I'm looking at you," Regina whispered as a smile overtook her lips.

"Nice answer," Emma grinned before she felt the brunette's hand on her chin and the two moved forward simultaneously until their lips crashed together, moving in unison for minutes on end until, out of breath, both parties pulled away.

"You're very good at that," Regina murmured, pulling the teenager's chair closer to her.

"So…this is what you meant by taking a break, huh?" Emma teased gently.

Regina chortled, "Well, not exactly, but I'm certainly not complaining," she traced the dark circles under the blonde's eyes, "You do look tired, though, sweetheart."

Emma nodded, "I guess I am, but we still have to study for your Spanish test next week."

"We don't have to do everything tonight, Emma. We can study for that, tomorrow," Regina said, absent-mindedly running her hair through the teenagers hair.

Emma shrugged, "Well, yeah, but I wanted to study Spanish," she muttered.

Regina laughed, "Oh, you silly girl. You are obsessed, aren't you?" she teased.

Emma blushed, "But I had a fun studying game in mind," she admitted.

The older woman quirked an eyebrow, looking amused, "Oh, did you? A studying game, huh? Tell me about this invention, then."

Emma looked down, feeling shy all of a sudden, "Well, you know…like you could test me and when I got a question right, you could like…take off some clothing or something," she mumbled, "And then, when I did really good, we could like…well, you know, you could seduce me or something. In Spanish. Like whisper in my ear," she sighed, closing her eyes, "And kiss me, and hold me," she blushed, opening her eyes as she shrugged, "I don't know."

Regina chuckled but couldn't hide the fire in her eyes, "Well, that does sound like a rather enticing game, dear. But, wouldn't you rather do it when you're awake enough to enjoy it?"

Emma tilted her head, squinting her eyes in thoughtfulness, "Hmm, you do make a good point, I suppose. But I'm having dinner with Belle and Ruby tomorrow, remember?"

"Hmm, I remember," Regina nodded, "I'm sure we can find time."

Emma nodded, chewing her tongue gently before she opened her mouth, "May I ask you something, Regina?"

Regina's brow furrowed, "Of course."

"You don't ever go out or anything, other than for work things… You never talk about your family. You lived by yourself before you took me in. I don't get it, you're so nice, why don't you… I mean…"

"Why don't I have any friends?" Regina finished quietly.

Emma nodded, a little awkwardly.

Regina sighed, "It's okay, dear. I suppose… most people, I find, well, simply annoying. I'm not one for these trivial conversations and surface relationships," she shrugged, "I've always enjoyed my own company, ever since I was a child. I mostly had imaginary friends," she smiled at the memories, before shaking her head, "It may seem silly, but nobody could ever really live up to those perfect images… " she sighed, "I suppose it's not normal, but I just felt safer in my own little bubble."

Emma frowned, "Didn't you get lonely, though? I mean, I like my own company too… but I'd get really lonely if I didn't have friends."

Regina looked thoughtful, "I suppose so. I think…after Bianca, I thought it would be easier not to be close to anyone…" she licked her lips, "And then, you came to me and I realised just how lonely I had been."

Emma felt her heart swell, "Really? I guess that makes sense… I had imaginary friends too. Actually, I had this whole imaginary world I used to hide in… I guess, I still do a little, but when I met you…it really slowed down. I guess it was my safe place, but that's you now, so…" she shrugged.

Regina smiled, "That's very sweet. You never miss that world?"

Emma shrugged, "Not much. Maybe if I'm really down or scared, I think it's like habit to retreat there… But um, the truth is, I had all these friends there who were just like made up people, and then all of a sudden, you were there too. Well, I mean a made up version I guess, but it was you. When we first started talking, I guess I knew you made me feel safe."

Regina's eyes widened in wonder, "Wow," she simply said, "You make me feel safe too," she smiled.

Emma blushed slightly, feeling the older woman's curious eyes boring into her, before she looked up, "But what about your family?" she asked, frowning.

Regina sighed, "My father passed away not long after Bianca did… My mother is, well, she's difficult."

Emma nodded, unsure whether to push, "Difficult," she repeated.

"Yes," Regina nodded, "She doesn't like anything I do. She thinks I'm…strange, and has ever since I was little. She was always telling me to be more like everyone else, to be more social, to wear dresses which I used to hate, and as I got older, told me that teaching was not a respectable job. My mother…was not a nice woman, she doesn't like that I like girls. In fact, she didn't even like Bianca, not that anything did happen between us, but we did spend all of our time together so there were rumours in the town… When Bianca died, my mother said…" Regina's breath left her body for a moment, until she felt a soft hand wrap around her own, "She said it was punishment for Bianca liking women and that if I wanted a better life, I should…try to be what she called normal."

"Wow," Emma breathed, squeezing the hand she held, "That's horrible. I can't imagine… I always thought a mom should support you and comfort you and love you unconditionally, but I guess even for those who get to stay with their parents, it's not always like that."

"No, I suppose it isn't. I have not spoken to my mother since then."

Emma's eyebrows shot up, "But that was so long ago… Doesn't she try to contact you?"

Regina shook her head, "No, she does not," she noted the horrified look on the teenagers face, "But it's okay – I don't think I would want to speak to her. Bianca was my best friend, and when she died, I needed someone to hold me, to comfort me, to tell me that good things happened to bad people… And my mother told me the exact opposite and left me crying in my room for weeks. She told me I was weak and to get over it, it was no loss for the world to get rid of another one of my kind," her nostrils flared in anger before she sighed, "That woman was poison to me, she only ever made me sad."

Emma nodded sadly, "I'm sorry she was like that… You deserved better."

Regina's eyes softened, "So did you, Emma," she said quietly, "But, at least now we have each other," she pulled the teenager into her chest, kissing her on the cheek, the jaw and then her ear, "Maybe we should get you to bed, though, hey?"

Emma blinked, "Maybe," she said reluctantly, "Do you still have much more marking to do?"

Regina shrugged, "A little, I'll bring it to bed," she smiled, knowing the teenager hated to sleep without her in the bed and her heart warmed at the relief in Emma's eyes before they trudged to the bedroom hand in hand.


	15. Teach Me Chica

A/N: Sorry guys, this is a shorter chapter than usual but I have like ten million assignments right now (someone wanna do them for me? haha) so I just wanted to get something up! Hopefully, I'll have another chapter up tomorrow (this was initially only the first half of the chapter, but I haven't updated for a few days so it will be two short-ish chapters instead!). Hope you enjoy! Thanks so much for the support, overwhelmed really J

Also, please forgive me because I actually don't speak Spanish at all, it's all google lol!

CHAPTER 15.

"I knew it," Ruby said, almost smugly when her friend informed her of the acceptance to Columbia, "Congrats, Belle."

Belle smiled shyly, "Thanks…"

"So, have you started looking for accommodation or - ?"

Belle bit her lip, "Well, no… I mean, I'm going to do the first semester distance ed."

Ruby frowned and glanced at an obviously uncomfortable Emma, quickly adding two and two, "Oh, yeah, well I guess… I mean, you can do that?"

Belle nodded, "Yeah, I can do a bunch of my subjects online for the first year, so I may as well take advantage of that," she shrugged.

Emma rolled her eyes, "I tried to convince her otherwise, but…" she shrugged.

"Em – "

"I know, I know," Emma sighed, "I've accepted it."

"Good," Belle smiled.

Ruby nodded, "Well, it's not quite the same, I guess, but I got accepted into community college," she shrugged.

Belle's face broke into a smile as she leaned forward, "Really? You applied? I thought you weren't going to go to college?"

Ruby shrugged again, "Well, I wasn't, but hey… you inspired me," she finished quietly.

Belle smiled, "Wow… that's awesome, Rubes. I'm proud of you."

It was something like old times, having started off a little awkwardly, the three got to talking quickly, filling each other on their lives since the rift between them. Emma sighed as she looked at her watch, wishing she could stay for longer.

"I better go," she said reluctantly, "I need to get some study done before bed."

Belle nodded, disappointed but understanding, "Sure, Swan. You need any help?"

Emma blushed, "Uh, not tonight. Regina and I are going to study Spanish," she muttered.

Ruby grinned, "That sounds like fun," she bounced her eyebrows up and down, but frowned when she noticed the two girls exchange a look, "Hey, what's the secret?"

Belle looked to Emma, questioning with her eyes.

Emma sighed, "Well, uh, how do I say this?" she wondered out loud, "I mean, you can be discreet, right?" she said lowly.

Ruby's eyebrows met her hairline, "Holy shit, did you actually hook up with her?"

Emma hesitated before nodding weakly, "Well, yeah."

"Shit, Em, nice going. Score," she raised her hand, ignoring Belle's disapproving glare.

Emma hesitated and high fived her friend, laughing, "But, seriously, you can't tell anyone."

Ruby nodded, "It's cool, I get it. But hey, you better go, don't wanna keep the Spanish teacher waiting, she might give you detention or something," she winked.

Both Emma and Belle rolled her eyes; though they had to admit, they had missed Ruby's unique attitude.

"Yeah, I better," Emma muttered as she stood up, "It's been really good hanging out, Rubes. We've missed you."

"Yeah, you too, Em. Now go home to your girlfriend," she teased gently.

* * *

"I've never seen you quite so excited to study, dear," Regina couldn't help but chuckle at the blonde's shining eyes.

Emma blushed, "Well, it's always easier when it's you teaching me."

Regina's smile widened, "You're very sweet."

Emma shrugged, "You're very sexy," she said, and automatically hung her head, blushing deeper.

Regina smirked at the teenagers embarrassment, "Thank you," she said softly and put a hand under the girl's chin, lifting her face upwards, "Don't be embarrassed, sweetheart. It's a compliment, I like compliments."

"Sorry," Emma's eyes were still downcast, "I'm not so used to like…flirting, or talking sexy or anything. I mean, you're so experienced and I'm…not."

Regina smiled, "I'm not _so _experienced, dear, but you need never be shy with me," she bit her lip, "Anyway, we should be studying," she winked.

Emma sighed, "Yeah, yeah," she mumbled.

Regina rolled her eyes, "Hm, motivation is hard to come by it seems," she pushed the teenager onto her back and climbed on top of her, placing a knee either side of her body, smiling down at the blonde, "Hola," she whispered.

Emma stared at the beautiful woman above her, "Hola," she choked out.

"Hm, let's start it easy then," Regina thought for a moment, "Days of the week."

Emma rolled her eyes, "Too easy. Lunes, martes, miercoles, jueves, viernes, sabado, domingo," she recited quickly.

The brunette shook her head and removed her sweater, noting the teenagers eyes flit to her bare arms, "Something more difficult then, then. Que tiempo hace?"

The blonde smiled; she knew this one too, "Hace calor."

Regina frowned, "Hot, really? It's the middle of winter, dear. I think you need to brush up on your weather vocab."

"Nah ah," Emma shook her head, "It's totally, totally hot in here," she grinned slyly.

Regina laughed quickly, "You're not talking about the weather at all," she rolled her eyes, "But, come on, how is the weather really?"

Emma shrugged, "Frio. Hace viento," she bit her lip, "Good enough?"

Regina pretended to think before she chuckled and pulled her shirt off over her head, blushing slightly at the fire in the teenagers eyes.

Emma's hands reached up to grab her teacher's waist but she was swatted away.

"Not yet," Regina lectured, "More study first."

Emma sighed dramatically, "Fine," she pouted.

"Hmm," Regina thought, "Okay, Who, when, where, how, why?"

"Blah, you sound like an English teacher now," the blonde rolled her eyes, "Quien, cuando, donde, como, por que."

Regina's eyebrows raised, "Your retention of this stuff has really improved dear, I am impressed."

Emma smiled, "Well, you are an excellent teacher."

"And you are a suck up," Regina teased, "Oh, I know, months."

Emma's smile vanished, "You know this one always trips me up," she pouted, "The pronunciation is too hard."

Regina shook her head, "Well, I can guarantee you it's on the test, so this one is important," she quirked an eyebrow at the teenager.

Emma sighed, "Enero, febrero, marzo, abril, mayo," she paused, "um, junio, Julio…agosto, sept…septthingy," she muttered, "oct – "

"Sept-thingy?" Regina tried to look stern rather than amused, "Really, Emma?"

The blonde shrugged, "Sept…septembero…"

Regina laughed, "Silly girl," she said fondly, "Septiembre."

"Yeah…that," Emma shrugged again as she yawned, "octubre, noviembre, diciembre. There," she finished proudly, looking up at the woman expectantly.

"Oh, no," Regina shook her head, "No reward, you didn't get it right. Don't you know the rules, silly?"

Emma pulled a face, "Such a teacher," she mumbled, "Fine, next."

"Okay, some questions then. Donde vives?"

"Yo vivo en Storybrooke."

"¿Cuántos años tienes?" Regina shot back.

"Tengo dieciocho," Emma drawled in boredom; her only hope that if she answered these boring questions her girlfriend would shed more clothes. For a few minutes she answered more questions automatically, she really had gotten to learn the language better as of late.

"¿Habla usted español?" Regina asked.

Emma laughed, "Shouldn't you have started with that?" she teased but faltered under the older woman's glare, "Hablo un poco de espanol," she answered, with a roll of her eyes.

"Very good," Regina murmured, pulling herself off the teenager and stepping off the bed.

"Hey, no fair, didn't I do good?" Emma propped herself up on her elbows, stopping her protest as Regina's hands moved to her own jeans button, undoing it slowly and sliding it down her olive legs.

"Yes, dear, you have done very well," Regina purred as she climbed back onto the bed in her underwear, "Though I do think you owe me a little something for that disgraceful Sept-thingy," she grinned, her eyes sparkling.

Emma blushed as her teeth nibbled on her bottom lip, "Yeah, yeah," she muttered.

"Arms up," Regina demanded and when the teenager complied, lifted her shirt over her head, running her hands over soft but toned arms, "You do have the nicest arms, dear. Such guns," she traced her fingers over biceps, smiling.

Emma flexed slightly as she did so and couldn't help laughing at Regina's eyes widening, "Thanks," she grinned, "I used to work out a lot, stress management," she shrugged.

"Mm, I can tell. One last test, dear," she laughed as the teenager rolled her eyes, "Tell me anything in Spanish."

"Eres Hermosa," Emma replied quickly.

Regina quirked an eyebrow, "I don't believe I taught you that one, dear, but thank you. You are beautiful too, and I think that was definitely a pass," she moved a hand behind her back and unclipped her bra, allowing it to fall away from her body.

Emma licked her lips unconsciously, "Wow," she said, her throat suddenly dry, "I love you, Regina."

Regina's cheeks darkened along with her eyes, "Te amo, Emma," she whispered.


	16. Sweet and Sour

**A/N: Hope the formatting isn't too painful, the editor wasn't working for some reason! I'll try and fix it up again tomorrow, but thought you'd prefer it up like this than not at all! Enjoy! Let me know if you have any suggestions/thoughts!**

**Chapter 16.**

"So, how are you with that?" Ruby asked, tilting her head and squinting slightly.

Belle sighed, not bothering to pretend she didn't know what Ruby meant, "It's fine," she shrugged, before attaching her mouth to her straw to attempt to look indifferent.

Ruby quirked an eyebrow, "Bullshit, Belle. Feelings like that don't just go away."

Belle stared at her friend for a moment, "Regina is good for her," she shrugged, "That's really all that matters. I just want Emma to be okay, and she really seems to be comfortable with Regina."

Ruby nodded, "That's good," she agreed, "Still, I know what it's like watching someone you really like fawn over somebody else."

Belle bit her lip, guiltily, "Ruby…"

The other woman shrugged, holding up a hand, "Don't worry about it, Belle. It wasn't a dig," she said honestly, "I just want to make sure you're okay. A lot has happened since…"

Belle nodded, "I'm okay, but thanks. I mean, I'm worried… How can I not be? She's my best friend, my family. Everything else," she shrugged, "It takes a backseat. Plus, there's no use dwelling on something that's never going to happen."

Ruby nodded slowly, "Yeah, I guess not," she agreed, "Let me know if I can help… I mean, I know Em doesn't really talk to me about deep stuff, but, I don't know… I wish I'd been there for her."

Belle nodded sadly, "Even if we all hadn't been fighting, Rubes, she didn't call me either, or Regina. I don't think it would have made a difference."

"Yeah, you're probably right," Ruby replied, "But I wish I'd been there for you. You must have been…" she trailed off.

The small brunette's eyes went soft at the edges, "It was awful," she whispered, "I was so scared."

Ruby's face was etched with concern, "I'm sorry I wasn't there," was all she could think to say, before she hesitated, sighing, "I guess you and Emma have it right though… Putting your friendship before any feelings… I hope we can do that too."

Belle's eyes widened, "I hope so too, Ruby," she said tentatively, "I've missed you," she chewed her bottom lip before continuing, "But I mean, just friends right? I mean, not that you would want anything else after the way I treated you," she added quickly.

Ruby licked her lips, "I still really like you, Belle," she admitted, "I've missed you as a friend and as my girl, but I get that you're not really in a place to be in a relationship and that's cool. I just don't want to lose you completely."

Belle's brow was furrowed; after the way she had treated Ruby, she still had feelings for her? Now she felt like even more of a jerk, "You'll never lose me, Rubes. But I treated you horribly… you deserve better."

Ruby shrugged, "You made a mistake, Belle," she said quietly, "It was shit," she admitted, "But, I don't know, I'm not really ready to be with anyone else yet anyway."

Belle smiled sadly, "Okay, fair enough," she paused, "It's not like I don't still have feelings for you, Ruby, but with everything that's going on," she sighed, "It's complicated."

"Yeah, I know," Ruby nodded, "Who knows? Maybe one day," she shrugged somewhat nonchalantly.

Belle squinted a little before nodding, "Maybe one day," she repeated, allowing herself a little hope that maybe she hadn't completely screwed things up with Ruby.

* * *

"Buenos días, princesa," Regina whispered into the teenagers ear as she pressed herself against Emma's back, wrapping her arms around her stomach.

Emma smiled at the tickle of breath on her ear, "Morning," she mumbled, before she turned around to face her girlfriend and sighing, "How do you look so beautiful when you just woke up?" she wondered aloud.

Regina's lips melted into a smile, "Thank you," she murmured, "You look awfully cute too, you know."

Emma snorted, "Yeah, yeah," she burrowed her face into Regina's chest, feeling the familiar sensation of touch in her hair, "I don't want to move," she murmured, closing her eyes again.

"Neither do I," Regina said, one hand in blonde hair and the other tracing patterns on her back, "But, alas, we must."

"No, not yet," Emma whined before yawning openly.

Regina rolled her eyes, "One day, we will start the morning without this argument," she mused.

Emma giggled, pulling back slightly to look at her amused partner, "Never," she poked out her tongue as the older woman rolled her eyes again.

"Such a child," she muttered.

"Hey," Emma pouted.

Regina smiled fondly before placing a kiss on the girl's lips, "It's okay, your immature antics are somewhat adorable."

Emma couldn't resist returning the kiss before she whined, "Hey, I'm not so immature, am I?"

Regina chuckled, "Not always," she teased, "Now, get up before I make you."

"Ooh, kinky," Emma laughed.

The brunette sighed, "No, not kinky dear," she said firmly, "But I will…tickle you," her hands found the teenagers waist, where she knew she was most ticklish and attacked her relentlessly.

"No, stop, stop," Emma squawked through the laughing but the older woman didn't desist, "Oh come on, stop please."

Regina pulled back, smirking at the girl catching her breath, "Well, then you better get up and get ready for school."

Emma sighed and grumbled, "Fine, fine. You're just lucky you're so hot."

Regina snorted, "Yeah, yeah, sucking up isn't going to get you anywhere, dear."

* * *

Emma yawned as she balanced her chin on her palm, staring at the screen. She looked around briefly, the rest of the class seemed moderately interested in the movie; she supposed it wasn't the worst thing they'd been forced to endure in English class. Miss Blanchard had busied herself with marking, she'd probably seen the movie a thousand times, Emma figured. Truth be told, the movie _was_ quite good and so she allowed herself to sit back and enjoy it.

Until it hit her. Why hadn't she seen it sooner? She was a writer, how could she not see where this story had been going? She felt her entire being tense up as the teenage boy on the screen went about stealing his father's gun and turning it over in his hands. Emma's mind went blank; sure, she'd used to watch this kind of stuff all the time, almost thrived on it, in fact, but right now, it was painful because she knew just what that boy was feeling. She blinked quickly, wiping a few quick tears, glancing around to make sure nobody had noticed. She could see tears shining in a couple of other students eyes too.

Emma shifted awkwardly in her seat. This feeling in her chest was uncomfortable. She knew she didn't want watch this, but she was trying this whole good student thing. Somehow, she managed to sit through the end of the movie and sighed with relief as the credits rolled.

But her relief was felt too soon, when the class discussion turned ugly.

"Suicide is a sin," one student declared confidently.

"That's crap, nobody would do it unless they were in a lot of pain. It's stupid to say those people would be punished, even in death," another fought back.

"It's totally selfish though, clearly they're only thinking of themselves," another student jumped in.

Emma closed her eyes and tried to remain calm; it's just a stupid class discussion, just sit back and stay neutral, it's not personal.

"I agree," the first student spoke again, "You have to be pretty selfish to put your family and friends through all that. Someone who commits suicide will go to Hell and suffer for eternity and maybe their loved ones will be better off without them – "

"You have no idea what you're talking about," Emma spoke quietly but steadily and felt every eye on her; it wasn't often, or ever, that she spoke up during class.

The first student recovered from the shock of hearing the blonde speak and smirked cruelly, "Well, we all know where you're going."

Emma bit her tongue for the quickest second before shooting back, ignoring the teacher's protests, "You don't know a thing about me, you self-righteous – "

"Everyone knows you tried to kill yourself, and that means you're – "

"Brooke," Miss Blanchard cut in shortly, "Get out, now. Go and see Mr Gold, now."

The student rolled her eyes as she gathered her things, "Plus she's a dyke, so – "

"Now," Miss Blanchard cut in.

* * *

Emma could feel herself shaking and clenched her fists, closing her eyes and chewing the inside of her cheek before she stood up and walked out of the classroom. She didn't care if she made a scene, she couldn't just sit there and pretend to be fine. She slammed her back against the wall and closed her eyes, hands still balled into fists.

"Emma?"

She opened her eyes to see Miss Blanchard standing in front of her.

"Are you okay?" the teacher asked.

Emma nodded, "Yeah, sorry I walked out – "

"It's fine, don't worry about that. Brooke was completely out of line, I'm sorry I couldn't shut her up sooner. You know, those things she said…"

"It's fine," Emma muttered.

Miss Blanchard shook her head, "No, it's really not. Here," she handed Emma her bag, "Why don't you go see the counsellor, or have some time to yourself?"

Emma nodded as she took her bag, "Thanks, Miss Blanchard," she said genuinely, swinging her bag over her shoulder and taking off down the corridor.

* * *

Wasn't she ever glad this was Regina's free period? The walk to her classroom felt like it took forever though, when all she wanted was the woman's company. Eventually, she knocked on the door lightly.

"Emma," Regina said in surprise, standing up and walking towards the blonde, "Why aren't you in class?"

Emma looked at the ground, "We watched this stupid movie," she said angrily, "And then this stupid bitch was saying I was going to Hell because I tried to kill myself and – "

"Emma, dear, hang on, start from the start," Regina put her hands on the distraught girl's shoulders.

Emma closed her eyes and took a deep breath through her nose before she started again, "We were watching this movie where the main guy ends up committing suicide and then in the class discussion this stupid girl, Brooke, was saying like suicide is a sin and they were debating about it, and I was getting annoyed but I just thought shut up, deal with it, it's not personal but it got too much so I told her she didn't know what she was talking about and then she got…personal."

Regina unclenched her jaw; she'd taught that girl before, she was a very opinionated student, "Personal, how?"

Emma looked at the anger flashing through the teacher's eyes and faltered, stuttering, "She said…everyone knew I'd tried to kill myself, but the thing was, they know it from years ago, not even recently, and that I was going to hell and Miss Blanchard sent her out but then before she went she had a go at me for being gay too. She's so fucking self-righteous," she finished angrily.

"Sweetheart, you know she is a naïve fool. She has an opinion and a stupid opinion and she is an idiot – "

"Whoa," Emma said, having never seen Regina so mad before, "It's okay."

Regina's nostrils flared before she took a deep breath, "I'm sorry. It just makes me mad, I would like to slap her," she sighed, "But I am a teacher and that wouldn't be appropriate."

Emma shook her head, "No, it wouldn't," she smiled, "But thanks for being so protective. It's kind of nice."

Regina sighed before allowing herself to smile, "I will always protect you, sweetheart," she murmured.

The blonde smiled as she nodded, "I know," she said, sighing, "Just being around you calms me down so much."

Regina felt her cheeks heat as she bit back a smile, "Good. Are you okay?"

Emma nodded, "I am now," she paused as the bell rang, before continuing, "I just needed to get out of that classroom. And see you."

The teacher offered a warm smile, "I'm glad. And I'm sure Miss Blanchard will understand."

"Yeah, she seemed pretty cool with it, actually," Emma's brow furrowed slightly in surprise.

Regina was thankful for that, "Good, not such a bitch anymore, is she?" she teased gently.

Emma rolled her eyes, "She's okay, for a teacher," she paused, "But you're still my favourite," she smiled slyly.

"Mm, come here," she put an arm around the blonde, who instantly burrowed into the safety of the older woman's chest. She loved listening to Regina's heart beat in her ear, it was the ultimate comfort and she closed her eyes now to hear it more clearly, contentedness painted on her face as she breathed in the scent of the woman, feeling her arms tighten around her.

And, it was that moment, where both forgot temporarily where they were and what they were doing, that they may have made one of the biggest mistakes possible to make. Miss Blanchard was left analysing the scene before her; was it merely comfort, or something deeper? The two sure did look familiar with one another, she thought, but surely Regina would never make such a professional blunder.


	17. Deflections

**A/N: Sorry again about the formatting guys, the editor on the site isn't working for me for some reason and my word-edits don't transfer across – if anyone has a solution please let me know, because it's really frustrating me! Anyway, enjoy! Let me know what you think **

Chapter 17.

"How did you go, sweetheart?" Regina asked as she wrapped a protective arm around the blonde's shoulder as they left the clinic.

Emma bit her lip, "It was okay. She's kind of nice, I guess," she mumbled, "But I still didn't tell her."

Regina nodded, "Don't worry so much about that, dear," she waved a hand, "You tell her what you're comfortable with telling her. Don't try to put some kind time limit on it."

Emma nodded, "Okay. So, do I get a lolly pop now?" she teased.

Regina's eyebrows shot up, "Excuse me?" she frowned.

Emma smiled sheepishly, "You think I don't notice, but every time I go to an appointment or do something…challenging, you do this reward thing. Like last time, you got me chocolate, and before that you cooked me butter chicken," she shrugged, "It's cute though, I like it."

Regina shook her head, "That obvious, huh?"

The blonde smiled as she hopped into the car, "Kinda, yeah. So, come on, what do I get?"

Regina rolled her eyes, "What would you like?" she asked.

Emma stroked her chin as she pretended to think, "Hrmm," she wondered aloud, "Pizza!"

The brunette grinned, "Yum, that certainly works for me. Do you want to have it at Granny's or at home?"

"Home," Emma stated, "I have more homework to do," she sighed.

Regina's eyes narrowed for a moment before she made up her mind, "No, not tonight, dear. You've been working so hard, you deserve a night off."

Emma tilted her head, "Really? You think that's wise? I have so much to do," she said unsurely.

Regina smiled, "Trust me, dear, one night of relaxing will be good for you."

"Relaxing," Emma said slowly, "Is that what you call it?" she sniggered.

Regina slapped her on the arm playfully, "That's not what I meant," she tutted, rolling her eyes, "Silly girl. Now, order the pizza."

"Yes, your majesty," Emma muttered as she pulled out her phone.

* * *

Mary Margaret clicked her car locked as she pulled her bags over her shoulder; she hated this time of year, there was way too much marking to do and to carry around all over the place. But she did it anyway, after all, if she could get some marked during class she wouldn't have to do them at home later.

She sighed; it was more than just the marking that was stressing her. As a teacher, she had a responsibility to her students, more than just academically, and she still couldn't figure out if what she had seen between Regina and Emma, a student, had been anything worth mentioning.

After all, the girl _had_ been quite upset, she thought, maybe it had just been an innocent, comforting gesture by the teacher. But, for some reason, her gut told her differently. There was that expression that most people could see when others' were more or less comfortable with another, and Mary Margaret could see, or thought she could see, that the two women had seemed overly comfortable together. It hadn't _seemed_ to be their first, awkward physical interaction.

It was not just a quick hug, though even those between student and teacher were deemed inappropriate. Emma, the student who struggled to make eye contact with anyone, had seemed to feel more than quietly comfortable in her teachers arms, not just sitting her head there idly but actually turning deeper into the hug as the teacher's arms had tightened around her, even laying a hand in blonde hair for a moment, before staying in that position for longer than seemed necessary.

As she dumped her bags down on her desk, she sighed again. The fact that she was still thinking about this, after the weekend, gave her an answer; she needed to confront Regina. She would at least give the woman a chance to explain before going straight to Mr. Gold.

* * *

"Swan, what are you working on?" Belle slumped opposite her friend in the café.

Emma looked up briefly, chewing the end of her pen, "This report for Nova," she mumbled, "Nearly done."

Belle nodded as she began to unwrap her lunch, "That's cool," she waved a hand, "Don't rush on my account, Em."

Emma smiled and went back to her work.

"Yo, Em, never seen you work so hard," Ruby joked as she approached, "Can I sit?"

Emma nodded, "Sure, you can keep Belle company while I finish this off."

Ruby smiled and plopped down next to Belle, "Sweet. Oh man," she stretched, "I'm so over Aurora and Mulan's PDA."

Belle looked over at the two girls Ruby was talking about, "Really? I think they're kinda sweet," she smiled.

Ruby rolled her eyes, "They are for a while, I guess. But trust me, you get over it. You kinda crave real conversation, rather than like oh did you like read that like magazine on like fluffing your eyebrows?"

Belle giggled, "What the hell is fluffing your eyebrows?"

Ruby shrugged sheepishly, "I don't know, I can't keep up with all these fashion trends. Maybe they didn't say that, it all sounds the same to me," she sighed.

"Yeah, well, lucky you're back with us, huh?" Belle said, before frowning at the assumption she had just vocalised, "I mean, if you want," she shrugged.

Ruby's face broke out into a wolfish grin, "Trust me, I want. Does that mean Tuesday dinner's are back on?"

Emma threw her pen down triumphantly, "Take that, bam! One down, three to go!" she grinned proudly.

The two girl's laughed at their friend's enthusiasm.

"And yep, dinner's back on," she continued, "I really, really missed your Granny's cooking. Though, Regina is kinda a whiz in the kitchen."

Ruby snickered, "What about in the bedroom?"

"Ruby!" Belle exclaimed, "God," she shook her head, "Don't ask her that."

"Oh come on, she's the only one of us who's been with an older woman, isn't that every teenagers fantasy?" Ruby said casually.

Belle blushed, "Not mine," she muttered.

Emma stared at her hands nervously.

"Come on, have you guys gone all the way or what?" Ruby persisted with her line of questioning.

Emma blushed, "Um, well, no we haven't actually," she mumbled.

"You're with a sexy, latino, older woman and you're telling me you haven't gone there?" Ruby asked incredulously.

"We've done other stuff, just not…that," Emma's cheeks burnt deeper.

Ruby squinted at her friend, "But you've seen her naked, right?"

Belle sighed audibly, "Oh my god, Ruby, not everybody is a sex addict like you," she rolled her eyes.

"I refuse to believe that," Ruby teased, shrugging, "So, have you?"

Emma bit her lip before nodding, "Yeah," she admitted.

"And?" Ruby lent forward eagerly.

"And what?" Emma asked, "She's beautiful. She's gorgeous. She's…damn sexy, especially when she speaks Spanish," she blushed even further as her mind unconsciously conjured up the image of her naked girlfriend.

"I bet," Ruby snickered at both of her blushing friends, "Good to be back, guys."

* * *

Regina sighed and put her pen down as she took a sip of coffee and lent back in her chair for a moment, savouring the taste. She could only read so many Spanish introduction's before all the words began to blend together. She looked up hopefully as there was a light knock on the door, but sighed upon seeing Mary Margaret.

"Mary Margaret, what can I do for you?" she asked.

The brunette teacher shifted on her feet, looking uncharacteristically awkward, "I need to have a word to you… about Emma Swan."

Regina frowned, feeling her stomach turn, "Oh? Has she not been attending class or – "

"No, no, her attendance and her work has been fine. She's been quite receptive lately, in fact," Mary Margaret assured the other woman.

"Okay," Regina brow furrowed further, "Then, what is it?"

Mary Margaret hesitated, "The other day, after the incident in my class, she came to see you. I was passing by after the bell and I noticed the two of you were… close."

Regina felt the blood in her veins go cold and took a moment to compose herself, "Uh, well I was, I was comforting her. She was quite upset, and as you know, I have been helping her lately, so I suppose she feels close to me…"

"That's…all it was? A comfort thing?" Mary Margaret asked evenly.

Regina nodded, "Of course," she stated, more confidence in her voice this time.

"You just looked very… comfortable with one another. It seems interesting to me that she ran straight to you, instead of her friends, when she was upset," the smaller brunette observed.

Regina sighed, "As I said, she has confided in me… Look," she sighed once again, deciding to try a little honesty, "You know, she has no parents, no adult influence. Nobody should have to grow up like that, so I suppose, perhaps, I have taken her under my wing a little. I believe she trusts me, and that's why she comes to me when she's upset. I don't think that's a bad thing," she finished, pushing a hand through her hair, hoping this explanation would satisfy the other teacher.

Mary Margaret nodded slowly, "I see. I suppose I can understand that… " she sighed, "You should be careful, Regina. If someone else had seen you like that… Just be careful?"

Regina was surprised, but grateful for the change in this woman in the last few weeks, "Okay, yeah, sure," she stuttered, "Thank you for coming to me first, I appreciate it."

The other woman smiled, "Sure. You know, I was thinking… I know you've been helping Emma a lot in regards to her illness and it seems to be something you're knowledgeable and passionate about. I wondered perhaps, if you had thought of running some kind of program," she paused, "I don't know. I just know that I am not the only one uneducated about mental illness, and I have come to realise how important it is that we, as teachers, have knowledge about the subject. Emma Swan is not the only student who has faced these issues. I think, with your passion, you could really make a difference."

Regina felt her eyes widen, "Thank you," she said quietly, "I really appreciate that. I don't know that I have any qualifications to educate others… but sometimes it is experience rather than qualification…" she sighed, "I do agree it's an important issue. I will certainly put some thought into that, and I really do admire that you are willing to change your opinions and learn. Not everybody has the self-awareness to do that."

Mary Margaret nodded, "I think it is something worth looking into… and if there's anything I could do to help, I would be willing," she smiled, "I should get some more marking done, though, and let you do the same," she raised her eyebrows at the other woman's pile of work.

"Yes, that time of year," Regina agreed before they parted ways. She sighed in relief, but also with some amount of guilt. She didn't like to lie but she had found herself in a situation where she had no choice. She closed her eyes, taking a deep breath. Feeling a little stressed, all she wanted to do was curl up with her young girlfriend, but she knew she needed to get some more marking done before she could take Emma home, so she opened her eyes and focussed her attention on the tests in front of her.


	18. Trying Calm

Chapter 18

Emma scribbled out another line in frustration. Her brain felt like mush, maybe she needed a break, she thought, sighing. She glanced up at the clock; she hadn't realised it had gotten so late, the library was due to close in ten minutes, anyway. She was kind of relieved for a good excuse to stop studying, as she began to pack her bag.

Regina must still be marking, she thought, so she trudged slowly to her classroom, allowing her girlfriend as much time as possible to keep marking. It sucked when she had to bring that stuff home, though at the moment at least it encouraged Emma to do her homework too.

"Hey," she knocked on the door lightly.

"Hello, dear," Regina smiled as she looked up to see the blonde, "Is it that time already?" she sighed as she removed her glasses, much to Emma's dismay.

"Yup," Emma nodded, "I think we're becoming workaholics. I don't think it's healthy, personally."

Regina chuckled, "Oh? Do you think there's some kind of remedy?"

Emma pondered for a moment, "Hm, I think take away and a movie may ease things a little," she tried.

Regina rolled her eyes, "All this takeaway, dear…"

"Oh, come on. Do you really feel like cooking?" Emma raised her eyebrows.

The brunette yawned, "No, I don't. Fine, but we're ordering salad," she said sternly.

"Psh, what's the use of take away if it's healthy?" Emma retorted.

Regina gave her a look and that was enough to make the blonde give in.

"Fine, fine. Whatever you say," she muttered.

"That's exactly right, my dear," Regina smiled as she packed up her belongings and led the student out of the school.

"Not so bad, is it?" Regina nudged the teenager gently as they sat on the couch, eating salad from take away containers.

Emma shrugged, "It's okay," she sighed.

"Hmm, how are you going with your essays dear?" Regina decided to change the subject.

Emma yawned, "Okay, I guess. I mean, I've got more than I thought I would have done by now done, so that's good," she screwed up her eyes, "But, I know what I'm like. I can power on really hard for a week or two, and then it's like my brain stops working and I can't find the motivation for anything," she shrugged.

Regina nodded, "That's okay, sweetheart. It's okay to take a break from time to time, and I'll help you get into a routine."

Emma smiled, "Thanks. You're sweet."

Regina placed a hand on the side of the teenagers neck and kissed her on the cheek, "And you will help keep me motivated to get through all this marking. And even more when exams come around," she groaned.

"More?" Emma asked incredulously, "More than lately?"

Regina smiled gently, "Yes, more. I don't know why I agree to mark exams," she sighed.

"Because you're considerate," Emma said confidently.

Regina blushed, "Perhaps," she said sheepishly, "Now, your turn to pick the movie, what are you going to subject me to tonight?"

Emma giggled, "Yes! I know exactly what we're going to watch," she dug through her dvd's until settling on one and holding it up proudly.

Regina raised her eyebrows, "Really? More Hitchcock? The birds…this is a scary one, isn't it?"

Emma rolled her eyes, "Yes, it's a thriller. But it's okay, if you get scared, I'll hold you nice and tight," she grinned.

Regina bit her lip, "Well, in that case, why don't you turn it on?"

"Oh my goodness, I will never look at birds the same way again," Regina shivered as the screen went blank, but revelled in the feel of Emma's hand in her hair.

Emma smiled, "t's amazing though, right? They don't make them like that anymore."

Regina rolled her eyes, "I thought I was the old one in this relationship."

Emma rolled her eyes right back, "You're not old, baby. You're…wise," she chuckled.

Regina glared up at her for a moment but couldn't help smiling, "I like it when you call me baby," she mumbled.

Emma blushed, "Really?"

Regina bit her lip and nodded, "Yes, it's nice. And kind of sexy."

Emma giggled nervously, "Cool," she mumbled, still running her hand through brunette hair.

* * *

"Em, slow down!"

Emma turned around to see her best friend catch up to her breathlessly, she pulled out her earphones, grinning sheepishly.

"Sorry, I mustn't have heard you," she apologised before giving her friend a hug.

"Yeah, yeah," Belle shook her head, "You look tired, Swan, are you sleeping?" she looked concerned.

Emma shrugged, "I might have pushed myself too hard lately," she admitted, "I think I'm starting to crash, I can barely keep my eyes open."

Belle nodded, "Give yourself a break, Em. I've got a spare now, why don't you come back to mine?"

Emma yawned, "Hm, you don't usually have a spare sixth? Anyway, I'm meant to meet Regina after school, but I guess she does have all that marking to do…"

"Come on, we'll watch a movie or something," Belle persisted.

"Are your folks home?" Emma asked warily.

Belle sighed, "Mom might be," she shrugged, "Don't worry about it, Em. They know you're my best friend, and they know I wouldn't be friends with someone who wasn't amazing."

Emma rolled her eyes, "Okay, I'll come. But hey, do you think you can read over my essay for Miss Blanchard? It's on Catcher in the rye."

Belle's eyes lit up, "Really? Yes! Show me!" she stopped and looked at Emma expectantly.

Emma laughed, "At your place? Jeez, so excited to read an essay," she teased, nudging her friend gently.

"Okay, okay," Belle blushed and kept walking.

* * *

Belle's house was only five minutes from the school but boy, was Emma ready to lay down as they walked through the front door.

"Hello? Mom, are you home?" Belle called into the house as she closed the front door.

"Hello, Belle, how was school?" her mom called back from the kitchen.

Emma groaned internally; she'd really been hoping Belle's parents wouldn't be home.

"It was fine, Emma's here," Belle led the way to the kitchen.

"Hello, Mrs French," Emma said politely as they reached the kitchen.

Belle's mother smiled politely, "Hello, Emma, it's been a while."

Emma nodded, "It has."

"Are you still at school?" she asked, somewhat patronisingly.

"Yes, I am," Emma simply replied.

"And doing well?" she continued.

Belle rolled her eyes, "Mom, please. She's doing fine, don't give her the third degree."

Belle's mom shrugged wordlessly as she left the room.

Belle felt guilty as her friend look uncomfortable, "Sorry, Em. It's just the way she is," she shrugged, "You want a soda?"

Emma nodded, "Yeah, thanks," she took the drink Belle offered and followed her to her bedroom, collapsing on the bed on her back, "Mm, your matress is so soft," she said sleepily.

Belle giggled at her sleepy friend, "Get some sleep if you want. I'll wake you in a bit."

Emma nodded and pulled the covers around her as she closed her eyes, she'd never felt so comfortable in her life, she thought as she drifted off to sleep.

* * *

"I just don't know why you're still hanging around with her," Belle's mother said in exasperation.

"Mom, she's my best friend. I don't know why you have to be so rude to her."

"She's a bad influence, honey, but you're young… you don't see it."

"Mom, she's not a bad influence. I'm not some kid who does everything her friends do, you know that. I think for myself. Besides, she doesn't even do anything bad, anyway."

Her mom raised her eyebrows skeptically, "Smoking, Belle? Drinking. I bet she's done drug and so help me, Belle, if you have –"

"Mom! She doesn't do drugs and she hasn't smoked since we were juniors and you know she's sober," Belle replied defensively.

"And what about this…gay thing? You were never …that way inclined before she came along."

Belle's anger flared up, "Mom, I was eight when she came along, I probably wasn't any way inclined. Emma didn't make me gay, it doesn't work like that. Now whose naïve?"

"Belle French, don't you speak to me in that tone of voice," her mother said, "I will be glad when you escape that girl's influence to Columbia."

"Mom, I'm not going," Belle blurted out in rage, "I'm doing a few units online first semester and staying here."

Her mom was shocked, "No, you are not. You are getting out of this town and making something of yourself, you didn't study so hard to stay in this dead-end – "

"Fuck, mom," she swore uncharacteristically, "I like Storybrooke. It's my home. You might hate it and want to escape it, but that's not me. I will go to Columbia one day, but not next year. I'm staying here. It's not an argument, it's my choice."

"It is your choice," her mom replied, "But you will not live under this roof and waste your potential."

The words were like a slap, "You'd…kick me out?" she stuttered.

"We have always said we would pay for you to rent somewhere near Columbia…" her mom shrugged, "That is where you are meant to be."

Belle's eyes shone with tears and she blinked rapidly. Not being able to find a response to her mother's harsh words, she turned on heel and slammed the front door on her way out.

* * *

"You're not tired, dear?" Regina glanced at the clock; it was nearing ten pm, not too far off their usual bed time.

Emma shook her head, "Not really. I slept at Belle's a while," she shrugged.

Regina nodded, pausing her marking to leave the dining table and sit next to the blonde on the couch. She hesitated, but she knew she had to be honest with the teenager, "I should tell you something. I should have told you yesterday, in fact."

Emma felt her body tense up, what could be making the brunette so nervous?

"What is it?" she asked apprehensively.

Regina bit her lip a moment before sighing, "Mary Margaret…Miss Blanchard saw us the other day…embracing. She asked me yesterday if it was something more than just me being kind to you," she ignored as Emma swore under her breath, "But it's okay. I convinced her it was innocent, just that I was mentoring you and you were upset, so I was comforting you."

Emma took a deep breath, "Did she believe you?"

Regina nodded, "Yes, she did. It's okay, dear," she placed a hand on the young girl's cheek, noting the guilt in her green eyes, "It's okay. We're okay."

Emma chewed her cheek roughly, "Should we… I mean, if it would be easier – "

"Sweetheart, it would not be easier," Regina stated firmly, knowing what the teenager was going to suggest, "I promise you, this, us, is what I want."

Emma smiled, a little reassured, "Me too," she murmured, curling her legs up under her and resting her head on the brunette's stomach.

Belle tapped on the window lightly to get her friends attention.

Ruby turned from her computer screen and spotted Belle at her window, she frowned and walked over to her, lifting the window to allow the smaller girl in.

"Belle, hey, have you been crying? Are you okay?" Ruby noted the tear streaks on Belle's cheeks.

Belle looked at her friend, sniffing, "Is it okay that I'm here? I'd go to Emma's, but I know how she'd react and she'd think it was her fault and – "

"Whoa, Belle, slow down," Ruby put her hands on her friend's shoulders, "It's alright you're here. I'm your friend, friend's help each other out where they're upset," she smiled at Belle, trying to assure her, "Tell me what happened. Something with Emma?"

Belle shook her head, "No, not with her. With my mom…" she paused, sighing as she sat down on the edge of the bed, "We had this big fight. It started out about Emma, you know, she doesn't like her at all and she was going on about her being a bad influence and even said Emma turned me gay," her cheeks flushed.

Ruby snorted, "Are you serious? It doesn't really work like that," she rolled her eyes.

"I know," Belle shook her head, "Anyway, then we got onto the subject of me 'escaping to Columbia'," she rolled her eyes, "and I told her I wasn't moving up there next year, about the online units…" she trailed off.

Ruby nodded, "Didn't go down so well, huh?" she said gently.

Belle shook her head, "She said… if I wasn't going to Columbia next year, I couldn't live with them."

Ruby's eyes widened before they creased, "Your mom said that?" she asked dumbly, but she was just as shocked as Belle had been.

Belle nodded sadly.

"You know your dad won't let her kick you out, Belle? He'd never agree to that… "

Belle shrugged, "I don't want to be in a house where my own mother doesn't want me, Rubes."

Ruby nodded; of course she could see where her friend was coming from, "Yeah… Well, maybe just let her calm down and see if she changes her tune. You probably shocked her, Belle, I mean it is a big deal you're not going to Columbia. It's been the plan for so long."

Belle felt her defences go up, "I'm enrolling, though, it's not like – "

"I know," Ruby placed a calming hand on her friends knee, squeezing it gently before removing it, "I get it, Belle."

Belle nodded, "Rubes, do you think I can stay here tonight?" she asked quietly.

"Of course you can," Ruby said quickly, putting her arms around her friend.

* * *

"Hey, Em," Ruby jogged up to her friend, noting her stony appearance and looked to where her friend's glare was directed, "Whoa."

Emma stared at her locker; the words 'go to hell', sinner scrawled across it in permanent marker, "I'm gonna punch her so hard she'll – "

"Who?" Ruby frowned.

Emma broke her glare from her locker to look at her friend, "Brooke. We had this fight in class the other day," she explained, clenching her fists.

Ruby nodded, "Brooke's a fanatic, everyone knows that. Don't worry about it," she sighed with relief as Belle approached them; she was way better at dealing with Emma when she was like this.

"Hey, guys, what's up?" she asked lightly, before frowning as she noted the tense look on Ruby's face.

Emma slammed her locker shut for Belle to see, watching her eyes widen.

"Ugh, Em, just ignore it," she moved closer to the blonde, placing a hand on her arm, "It's not worth it."

Emma looked at the brunette, "I'm just meant to let her say whatever the fuck she wants to say about me?"

Belle bit her tongue for a second, "Em, her opinion doesn't matter. She doesn't matter."

The blonde was still shaking as she took a deep breath, "I know," she agreed, "It just pisses me off," she mumbled.

Belle nodded, "I know, but she's probably trying to bait you, Em. She knows which buttons to press, she wants you to react."

Emma lent her head against the lockers and nodded, "You're right," she muttered and paused as the bell rang, "At least I have Spanish," she smiled sheepishly.

Ruby rolled her eyes, "Keep it in your pants, Em," she teased.

Emma sighed dramatically, "Ugh, I have to in school, don't I? Do you have any idea how hard it is not to jump her when she's standing up there speaking that damn language?"

Ruby burst out laughing, "I bet," she snickered.

Belle blushed at hearing her best friend speak so crassly, "Em," she whined, "Jeez."

Emma chuckled, "Sorry," she mumbled, "Anyway, we have to be extra careful now," she said as the three started walking to their classes in separate directions. She explained what had happened with Miss Blanchard before parting way with her friends to make her way to her Spanish class.

* * *

Emma looked around the almost empty classroom before looking up at the clock; things had clearly changed, she thought, since when was she five minutes early? She put her earphone's in and rested her head on the desk.

She felt her earphones pulled out of her ears and looked up to see a smirking Brooke standing in front of her desk.

"Bought your ticket yet?" she asked.

Emma stood up, "What the fuck is your problem?" she growled.

"People like you," Brooke retorted.

"Why the hell does what I do with my life effect you?" Emma asked, aware of the eyes of a few students on them.

"Because people like you poison the world," Brooke stated, "People like you are clearly mistakes. You know why you have mental issues, don't you? It's God's way of trying to fix his mistakes."

Emma's brow furrowed, "What the fuck does that even mean?"

"It means that you were meant to kill yourself, and yeah, maybe something happened and you survived, but He'll get rid of you somehow. The easiest way is to make you do it yourself, so why don't you do the world a favour and – "

Emma's fist smashed into the other girls mouth, splitting her lip open.


	19. Empowerment

**A/N: Hey, sorry for the delay! A bit more Belle-centric but don't worry, more development for Regina/Emma next chapter! Enjoy! =] Thanks for reading**

**Chapter 19**

Emma flicked the television channels in boredom. _So many channels and nothing on_, she thought, closing her eyes until there was a knock at the door. She rubbed her eyes; she hadn't been asleep, merely dozing but her eyes felt heavy as she trudged to the door.

"Hey," her enthusiasm lifted a bit upon seeing her best friend and let the brunette enter.

"Hey, Em, how's the suspension?" Belle asked, before giving her friend a quick hug.

Emma sighed, "It's fucking boring, I never thought I'd actually miss school. I mean, have you seen daytime television? It's like Regina had a hundred channels and there's nothing on."

Belle rolled her eyes, "I don't think you're meant to watch television on suspension."

Emma laughed quickly, "Yeah, yeah. I've been doing my homework too, mom," she teased.

The brunette smiled, "Good, you want me to look over anything?" she offered.

Emma thought for a moment, "Hm, maybe this essay I'm working on… but let me finish it first then I'll show you," she smiled, "Thanks, Belle."

Belle smiled, "It's cool, you know I enjoy it," she replied honestly.

Emma grinned, "Yeah, I know you do," she giggled, "Hey, how's Ruby?"

"She's good," Belle shrugged.

"And you two are alright? Like it's all good?" Emma questioned.

Belle frowned a moment but then smiled, "Yeah, it is. I mean, there was a little bit of awkwardness to begin with, but we're all good now."

Emma nodded, "I'm glad," she hesitated, "I'm sorry I'm not there to keep you company," she mumbled.

Belle looked at her friend quizzically, "Em, it's okay, I have Ruby," she reassured her, "It's not like it was when we were younger, you know that. Nobody gives me trouble anymore, I can do okay without you there," she convinced her friend, not realising she would be eating those very words soon.

Emma smiled, "So, it's alright for me to get suspended then?"

Belle didn't return the smile, "Don't push your luck, you," she nudged her friend playfully.

Emma grinned, "You wanna watch some crappy daytime tv with me?"

Belle smiled, "Thought you'd never ask," she took a seat next to her friend.

They chatted about everything and nothing. This was why their friendship was special; they could go from a deep and meaningful to giggling teenagers in the space of seconds. They could laugh about lame soapie's and talk about their favourite books. They could sit in silence and just enjoy one another's company. Belle smiled as Emma leant on her and closed her eyes, and let her own close too.

* * *

Regina clicked her car locked and headed up the steps, another load of marking tucked under her arm. She sighed as she fumbled for her keys and unlocked the front door, stepping into the apartment, her expression softening at the sight of the two teenagers asleep on the couch.

She set her things down gently and tried to be quiet as she made herself a cup of tea and sat down as she began her marking, until she heard some rustling on the couch. She glanced up and saw Belle sitting up, yawning and wiping her eyes. She stood up, and stretched, smiling over at Regina as she noticed her presence and making her way over to the dining table.

"Hey," she smiled, glancing back at Emma, checking she wasn't speaking too loudly.

"Hey, day time tv, huh?" Regina nodded at the television, "Put anyone to sleep, that crap."

Belle nodded, chuckling, "Yep, are you just here for your lunch hour?"

Regina nodded, "Yeah, I didn't realise you were coming over this morning."

"Class was cancelled," Belle shrugged, "So I thought I'd come visit. She must get bored without anyone around all day."

Regina sighed, "I know, that's why I came too," she smiled, "But it's only a couple more days."

Emma groaned as she woke up, "You guys are noisy," she mumbled.

Regina rolled her eyes, "Hello to you too, dear."

Emma smiled sheepishly as she rolled off the couch and headed to the table, wrapping her arms around the still-sitting Regina, "Hello," she whispered, before looking at the clock, "Oh man, half the lunch hour is gone already, you should have woken me," she pouted.

Regina bit her lip, "I'm sorry, dear, you two looked so adorable dozing on the couch, I couldn't bear to wake you."

Emma sighed, "Yeah, yeah."

"Hey, at least I get a head start on these," she gestured to her marking, "Means we'll have more time to ourselves tonight."

Emma smiled and nodded, "Yay. Will you come straight home then?"

Regina nodded, "I will."

Belle giggled, "You guys are so cute, like an old married couple or something."

Emma blushed; sometimes when she looked at Regina, she forgot anybody else existed, even if they were in the same room.

Regina quirked an eyebrow, "Who are you calling old?" she laughed as Belle looked guilty, "Would you like a lift back to school, dear?"

* * *

Belle was reading her book at the back of the library, completely enthralled by the story in front of her. She should be doing her homework, but even she knew how to have fun from time to time. She could practically hear Emma giggling at her idea of fun in her head, but she didn't care; reading _was_ fun.

She didn't even realise someone approach her table until they spoke.

"Notice your friends become absentee."

Belle raised her eyes from her book to see Brooke standing in front of her table.

She sighed, "What do you want, Brooke?"

Brooke put her hands and leant closer to the small brunette, invading her personal space, "You speak too quietly. No wonder you can't put her on the right track."

Belle leant back against her chair and put her book down, "I'm not biting, Brooke. Just leave me alone."

Brooke rolled her eyes at the weak demand, "I don't get it though, how someone who seems so…good can be friends with that."

"You don't know me or her," Belle replied a little louder.

Brooke shrugged, "You know she's bad."

"You're the one whose trying to rile people up for no reason."

The other student just smiled, "Sorry, Belle, you're just collateral damage."

Belle frowned, "Look, you don't agree with her way of life or whatever, fine, so just leave her alone. We have, what, two months left of senior year? Just ignore her."

Brooke shook her head, "You don't get anywhere in life by letting people get away with shit. Really, that's the message you want to send – "

"It's not like she's hurting anyone. It's just a difference of opinion," Belle felt her voice go higher in anger, "It's not worth all this."

That's when Ruby entered the library and made her way to her friend quickly upon seeing the heated interaction going on.

"Everything alright?" she asked sharply as she passed Brooke and stood beside her friend.

Brooke broke her harsh gaze from Belle to look at the newcomer, "Just peachy," she smiled insincerely.

Ruby fixed the other girl with a glare as she nodded, "Right, piss off then," she smiled back, bouncing her eyebrows.

Brooke thought about retaliating for a moment before rolling her eyes and walking away.

Ruby pulled out a chair and sat beside her friend, "You alright?"

Belle cheeks burned, "I'm fine, I had it handled. I didn't need you to come save me –"

"Whoa," Ruby put her hands up, "It looked like she was giving you a hard time, I'm your friend, what am I meant to do?"

Belle bit her lip, "I know," she sighed, "I'm sorry. She really pisses me off, Ruby, it's the last thing Em needs, some stupid, mindless bully."

Ruby nodded, "I know… I guess some people are just like that. I just don't want her to turn on you now that Em's not here."

Belle nodded, "She will though," she said quietly, "I'm an easy target."

Ruby frowned, "You don't have to be."

Belle snorted, looking at her friend incredulously, "I always have been, Ruby. I'm quiet and I don't like arguing with people, so they pick on me. It's what happened for years," she mumbled, "But, I always had Em around to protect me… and eventually, they learnt to leave me alone."

Ruby nudged her friend, "Well, hey, I can protect you."

Belle's cheeks burnt with heat again, "That's not the point. I don't want to _need_ protecting, Ruby, I want to look after myself."

Ruby nodded, "Yeah, I know," she really did sympathise, "You just gotta try do something to empower yourself. I mean, you're one of the smartest, strongest chicks I know… you just doubt yourself and unfortunately people can see that," she said softly.

Belle looked thoughtful, "Empower myself," she wondered aloud.

* * *

Emma stretched standing up, "Anyway, I'm gonna go to the gym while I've got the time," she told Belle, somewhat reluctant to leave her friend in their only spare period together, but she was itching to get back to working out. She'd forgotten how good it used to make her feel.

"Aw, okay, dinner tonight, yeah?" Belle asked.

Emma nodded, "Yeah, course, Granny Tuesdays."

Belle hugged her and watched her walked away, before calling out and running after her.

Emma frowned, turning around, "What's up?" she asked, noting the nervousness in her friend's stature.

Belle bit her lip, "Um, do you think I could come?"

Emma's frown deepened, "To the gym?"

Belle shrugged, "Yeah."

The blonde tilted her head, "Well, yeah, of course you can, but like…why?"

The brunette blushed as she started walking, "What, you're the only one whose allowed to exercise?"

Emma put her hands up, "Alright, alright, let's go.

Belle had watched Emma punch that stupid bag a thousand times. Why wasn't it the same when she did it? She sighed in frustration.

"Belle, hey," Emma came over to her friend, "Don't fold your thumb in like that, okay? Here, like this," she clenched her fist, showing Belle how to hold her fists.

Belle nodded, "Okay, thanks," she said shortly.

Emma frowned and moved behind the bag, holding it for her friend, "Go on, hit."

Belle hit the bag a couple of times.

Emma could see her friend's frustration, "Belle, what's going on?"

"It moves so much when you hit it, my punches suck," Belle muttered.

Emma smiled, "It's all good, you're punching too high for one thing," she pointed lower on the bag, "It's softer down lower, so you should punch there and then it will move," she shrugged, "But hey, that doesn't really matter. It takes time to get stronger, you know I used to work out all the time."

Belle nodded, "Yeah, right, I know."

Emma was still confused, "Why the sudden interest in the gym anyway?"

Belle shrugged, "I'm sick of relying on everyone else to protect me," she muttered.

Emma let go of the bag, "Hey, did something happen when I was suspended? Did someone say something? Did someone hurt you?"

Belle stepped closer to her friend and put a calming hand on her arm, "No," she sighed, "I mean, Brooke said some stuff but it was nothing," she shrugged, "Ruby said I should find a way to like empower myself."

Emma took a deep breath, "What'd she say – "

"Em, seriously, don't worry about it. She's stupid," Belle waved a hand, "But you know, you've always stood up for me… and I love you for it, but I want to feel like I can defend myself. Stand up for myself. Sometimes I think I'm too quiet, too passive."

Emma sighed but nodded, "Okay, I get that. Let me help you, then."

Belle nodded, "Okay."

"One condition?" Emma smiled.

Belle looked apprehensive, "Hmm?"

"I don't want you getting into any fights, missy," Emma laughed.

Belle rolled her eyes, "Yeah, yeah, very funny. We all know whose Rocky here," she sighed, before joining her friend in laughing.

* * *

"Hm, really? I can't imagine Belle boxing," Regina mused as she pulled Emma into her lap, as they snuggled on the couch.

Emma shrugged, "She wants to feel empowered. I think it's good, she is quiet… she doesn't always stand up for herself when she should. When we were younger, and anyone said anything to her, or bullied her or whatever, I would step in and tell them to back off."

Regina smiled, "I can imagine that," she nodded, "But you can't protect her forever," she said quietly.

Emma bit her lip, "I know that," she nodded, "That's why she needs to learn stick up for herself, so if she thinks getting in shape will do that," she shrugged, "then of course, I'm going to help her."

Regina grinned, "Well, we all know how in shape you are," she flipped the blonde onto her back and towered over her and ran a hand over her arm.

Emma blushed, "Shut up, you," she mumbled.

Regina smiled, "But really, I'm proud of you. You're such a fantastic friend, dear, really, I admire your dedication and loyalty. It's rare. You're pretty amazing."

Emma chewed her lip, "Thanks," she mumbled; she still didn't know how to take compliments, "I love you."

Regina chuckled softly as she flipped their bodies again and held Emma on top of her, "I love you too," she whispered into her ear, "Mm, I want you here like this forever."

Emma nuzzled into her neck, closing her eyes, "Right back at you," she whispered, "Stupid school, stupid work," she mumbled.

Regina chuckled again placing a hand in blonde hair, "Yes, I know," she sighed, "Now, how are you going with all your work? You know exams start in a few weeks, are you going – "

Emma rolled her eyes, "Yeah, I know," she interrupted, "I'm nearly finished my last essay for Miss Blanchard, so then I just get to focus on my exam's, yay," she finished, sarcastically.

Regina smiled, "Well, how about I promise to make it worth your while?"

Emma pulled away and looked up at her girlfriend with shining eyes, "Oh, yeah?"

The brunette winked, "Of course, I'm a teacher, dear, you know how we like our reward systems."

Emma squirmed slightly as she lay her head back down, "You're such a tease, sometimes," she whined.

Regina's throat practically purred, "You love it."


	20. New Places

Chapter 21

Emma hit one final button on the keyboard, clicked print and sat back in her chair, smiling.

"Finished," she claimed proudly.

Belle looked up at her friend and smiled, "Sweet. Now all you're caught up!"

Emma grinned, "Yeah, thanks for your help, Belle, you always pick up my weak spots."

Belle smiled, "They're not weak," she rolled her eyes, "But it's all good. Do we get to celebrate?"

Emma bit her lip, "Actually, Regina and I were going to have a night in…"

The brunette nodded, "Okay, that's cool, we can hang out on the weekend," she shrugged.

"You sure?" Emma asked, a little guiltily.

Belle waved a hand, "Of course, Em. She's your girlfriend, go hang out…or whatever," she smiled slyly, "with her. Have fun. You deserve it."

Emma couldn't help giggling, "Hmm, I'll be sure to tell Regina you said so," she replied cheekily.

Belle rolled her eyes but laughed.

* * *

"Really, you finished your last essay? With the stamp of approval from Belle?" Regina asked, as they sat down on the couch, Emma crossing her legs and facing her girlfriend.

Emma nodded happily, "Yup! Did you ever doubt me?" she grinned.

Regina shook her head, smiling, "Never," she said honestly, "I'm proud, honey. I know how hard you've worked to catch up, and I know we've sacrificed a thousand nights, but," her eyes begun to shine, "I think we've earned a night to ourselves, don't you?"

Emma giggled giddily, "Yep, definitely," she said confidently.

Regina smiled as she pulled Emma by her shirt closer to her, pressing her lips against the teenagers as she felt arms wrap around her neck.

"Mm, I've missed that," Regina mumbled against soft lips.

Emma merely sighed in agreeance as she lay on her back, pulling the teacher on top of her and letting out a quick, sharp gasp as Regina's knee found her crotch.

"Sorry," Regina apologised, "I – "

Emma squirmed and bit her lip, "Don't be," she said quietly, "It felt nice," she felt her cheeks burn, but it was the truth. She knew she trusted Regina, there was no doubt about that for a moment, but she'd still been reserved with the older woman, physically. Even though a part of her was nervous, she was kind of sick of waiting.

Regina grinned, "Nice," she repeated quietly as she continued kissing the teenager's neck.

Emma ran a hand down on her own body until she found Regina's on her waist, and hesitating only slightly moved it to in between her legs.

Regina stopped sucking on skin, "Are you sure, dear?" she asked, gently; she really hadn't minded taking it slow with the teenager, she wasn't that experienced herself for someone of her age, but she'd be lying if she said she hadn't thought about touching Emma.

Emma nodded, "I'm sure," she whispered.

Regina bit her lip and measured the look in the teenagers eye; she was nervous, but the desire was evident, and so the older woman used two hands to undo her girlfriend's jeans, "Tell me if you want me to stop," she whispered into Emma's ear, before nipping it gently as she slid her fingers over the blonde's wetness, revelling in the way Emma's breath hitched and her back arched, eyes closed as Regina caressed her gently, all the while her own warm breath tickling the blonde's cheek.

* * *

Ruby was glad to be finished her shift as she sat opposite Belle with a loud yawn as she stretched her arms.

"Man, am I glad that's over. Last Friday night shift for a while," she stated.

"Really? You're free Friday night's now?" Belle asked.

Ruby shrugged, "Yeah, I'm cutting down until exams are over, so I don't know about 'free' but no waiting on stupid customers."

Belle nodded and giggled, "Don't let Granny hear you say that."

Ruby rolled her eyes, "You know she complains about some of them more than I do," she smiled, "Anyway, once exams are done, she's gonna start teaching me to crunch the numbers, balance the books, all that stuff."

Belle's eyes widened curiously, "Really?"

Ruby nodded, "Yup, then I can help out more."

"Are you still going to community college next year?"

Ruby smiled, "Yes, mom," she teased, "I am, but Granny can't take care of the diner on her own forever," she shrugged, "As much as I complain, I love this place."

Belle grinned at her friend's enthusiasm, "I know you do, I think that's sweet, Rubes. You're a good granddaughter."

Ruby shrugged, smiling nonchalantly, "Hmm," she hummed, "How are things with your mom, anyway?"

Belle bit her lip, sighing, "It's still a little raw, I guess. Dad is good, he's kind of the middle-man at the moment. I don't know what I'm going to do next year. I need to get a job so I can move out," she shrugged.

Ruby nodded slowly, clearly thinking, "Well, hey, we could totally share a place. I mean, I'll be able to afford something pretty small and crap, but that's what being a student is all about, right?"

Belle tilted her head, squinting her eyes, "Really?"

"Totally," Ruby said enthusiastically, "Think about it, how fun would it be?"

Belle smiled, "It would be," she agreed, "I just have to find a job," she groaned.

Ruby thought for a moment, "Hmm, you'll find something. Hey, worst case I can get you a couple shifts here while you look for something else."

Belle chewed her cheek, "Really? I don't know, though… Do I have to dress like you?" she laughed as her friend pretended to glare at her.

"Ha ha," Ruby rolled her eyes, "Tip, Belle, when someone's doing you a favour don't make fun of them," she said light heartedly.

Belle stifled her laughter, "Sorry, Rubes, I just don't think the tiny red shorts would suit me," she snorted at the image.

Ruby had to laugh at her giggling friend, "That's true… Maybe blue?"

That was it and the two were clutching their sides in pain as they laughed loud and hard, earning a glare from Granny and some amused glances from the other patrons.

* * *

Regina kissed the blonde's cheek as the teenager curled up against her side.

"Are you okay, sweetheart?" she asked concernedly.

Emma nodded, eyes closed and relaxed, "More than okay," she mumbled, "That was amazing."

Regina smiled, relieved that Emma was comfortable with her and proud that she had made her girlfriend feel that way, "I'm glad," she said, running her hand through the blonde's soft hair, "I love you."

"I love you too," Emma sat up for a moment to place a kiss on Regina's plump lips, "I think you should reward me more often," she said with a cheeky look in her eye.

Regina grinned and giggled, "I think so too," she said softly, caressing her cheek gently, "I'm honoured you trust me," she whispered.

Emma bit down on her bottom lip, "I do," she confirmed, before pausing, "Maybe next time, I can…reward you."

Regina noted the rosy cheeks on the teenager and couldn't help smiling, "Mm, if you like," she kissed Emma's cheek, "No rush, whenever you're ready."

Emma nodded, "Thank you."

Regina blinked, "For what?" she asked.

"You've just been so good with me," Emma shrugged, "So patient and…" she trailed off.

The brunette pursed her lips for a moment, "Of course, honey," she said gently, "There is much more to a relationship than the physical things. I see everything I need in your eyes," she smiled.

Emma blushed, "But it is fun," she mumbled, giggling nervously.

Regina giggled too, "It is," she agreed.

* * *

"Yo, Em," Ruby lent against the lockers casually next to her.

"Hey, Rubes, what's up?" Emma replied, looking for a textbook in her locker.

Ruby shrugged, "Not heaps, Belle says you and Regina were celebrating last night," she bounced her eyebrows up and down.

Emma blushed, turning back to her locker, "Uh-huh," she replied.

Ruby nudged her playfully, "Oh come on, Em, give me more than that aye?"

Emma rolled her eyes, "You're such a…"

Ruby laughed, "Still taking it slow?"

Emma sighed heavily, "Yes," she confirmed, "God, not everything is about sex, you know."

Ruby held up her hands in defence, "I know, I know."

Emma yawned and gave up; she must have left her book at home and closed her locker, swinging her bag over her back and turning to her friend and sighed, "Okay," she said quietly, looking around self-consciously, "We might have gone a little further than usual last night," she admitted.

Ruby's eyes lit up, "Oh yeah? Did you guys go all the way?"

Emma blushed deeper, "Ruby," she growled, before sighing, "I don't know, okay? I don't even know what counts as all the way with girls," she admitted.

Ruby thought for a moment, "Good point, everybody kinda has a different opinion on that, I guess," she shrugged, "So, what did you guys do, exactly?"

Emma bit her lip; it wasn't like she didn't want to talk about it, she was a teenager and she'd just gone as far as ever sexually with another person, of course she wanted to talk about it, she just didn't know how.

She leaned over to her friend and whispered in her ear, pulling back and staring at the ground, her cheeks still heated.

Ruby nodded, a wide smile on her face, "Nice going!" she exclaimed, bumping into her friend playfully, "Damn, girl."

* * *

"Come on, ten more," Emma pushed her worn out best friend.

Belle glared at her as she kept punching the bag, trying to keep air in her lungs, she counted as she grunted and finished with one final, strong punch just to spite her friend. Ugh, she thought, feeling herself sweating and the hair sticking to her face.

"You're cruel," she wheezed out, removing the gloves from her hands.

Emma smiled; Belle looked super cute when she worked out, "Sorry, but hey, you're getting stronger."

Belle looked at her friend suspiciously, "Really, you think so?"

Emma nodded, "Totally," she replied honestly, "Maybe next time, we'll spar."

Belle shook her head, "No way, you'll kill me, Swan!"

Emma rolled her eyes, "As if, you know I wouldn't hurt you."

The brunette grinned sheepishly, "Yeah, of course. Ugh, I need to shower before class, disgusting."

Emma grinned, "I think it suits you," she claimed.

Belle rolled her eyes, "Nah ah, sweaty is ew."

Emma shrugged, "I think it makes you look cute," she admitted, "Kinda tough, but still in a real sweet way."

Belle blushed, "Shut up," she grumbled, "But thanks. Maybe I'll work out before my next date," she joked.

Emma laughed, "Hey, it'd totally get you laid."

"Em," Belle pushed her playfully, "You've been spending too much time with Ruby."


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter 21

Usually it was Emma distracting Regina from her marking, but this night the school teacher must have been feeling particularly frisky as she placed her work down on the table and snuggled up to the teenager, who was reading over a textbook quietly. Emma smiled but continued reading until the brunette nuzzled into her neck.

"I'm trying to study you know," Emma pushed her away playfully.

Regina pushed right back and started kissing her girlfriend's neck, nipping it gently, "Since when are you so responsible?" she purred.

"Since I have exams in a fortnight, Miss Mills," she said pointedly, squirming away from the brunette but ultimately trapping herself in the corner of the couch.

Regina's eyes lit up as she further invaded the teenagers space, "Well, what if teacher says you should take a break?" she replied huskily.

Emma closed her eyes; she did love it when Regina did that thing with her voice, it was so…seductive, she opened them a moment later and bit her lip, "Well… I suppose if teacher says…"

Regina grinned, "Mm, teacher says," she purred.

"Well, I wouldn't want to get detention now, would I?" Emma dropped her textbook on the table and pulled Regina into her lap.

"I think, dear, you have been in quite enough trouble this year," Regina noted, licking her lips, "So, then, I suppose you should be trying to get in someone's good books."

Emma couldn't help grinning, "Oh, yeah? You're probably right," she mused, "Any suggestions?"

Regina merely chuckled, pressing her lips gently against Emma's for a few moments before both opened their mouths and allowed their tongue's to dance with one another. Regina's hand fell to the teenagers waist, sliding her hands under the singlet she had on, running slowly along her stomach.

"Mm," Emma hummed at the sensation as Regina's hands found her breast and caressed it gently, finally breaking the passionate kiss, "Nice," she mumbled.

"Hm, good," Regina purred as she moved her nimble fingers to the blonde's nipple, inciting a gasp from Emma before rested her head against Regina's shoulder, "You're so beautiful, Emma," she whispered, sliding her hand over to the other breast.

Emma felt the heat on her cheeks as she immersed herself in the pleasure Regina's hand was giving her, "You're so sexy," she half whispered, half moaned.

Regina giggled, "Mm, so are you," and with that she pulled the singlet off over Emma's head and replaced her hand with her lips, lightly caressing her breasts at first before pulled a nipple into her mouth and then massaging it with her tongue, relishing in the noises that came from the teenagers throat as she did so.

* * *

"Okay, I suppose now you can study," Regina stated after they had laid in silence a while.

Emma snorted, "No way, I can't study after that."

Regina chuckled lightly, "Mm, it was rather nice. I do enjoy being close to you," she murmured gently into Emma's ear.

"I enjoy it too," Emma replied, somewhat sheepishly, "I like being your teachers' pet."

Regina had to laugh at that, "Oh, dear, you know I won't be your teacher for much longer. I do hope you're still interested in me when I'm not," she half-joked.

Emma bit her lip and looked at the brunette, sensing the insecurity in her words, "Of course I will," she said quietly, "You're much more than just a damn sexy Spanish teacher, you know that. You're like…my best friend, my family. You get me…and you always, always make me feel better when I'm down. You love me…for who I am, even though I fuck up a lot. And you're…well, you're my safety… you're my home."

Regina's eyes shone with tears and she pulled the blonde as close as she could, "Thank you," she choked out, clearing her throat before she continued, "I love you so much, dear, more than I ever thought possible. You make me feel so special, so loved, and, well, you are my family, my home too. I cannot imagine being without you."

Emma sighed, "I never thought I'd have this," she admitted, "I feel so very lucky. I want to lay this way forever," she tensed up a little as she realised what she had just said.

Regina merely smiled, "So do I," she agreed, seeing the relief flood her young lovers face.

* * *

"Where's Belle?" Ruby asked as Emma emerged from the gym.

"She's still in the shower," Emma answered, "She doesn't like being sweaty, she takes forever," she rolled her eyes.

Ruby laughed, "Doesn't she know sweaty is hot?"

Emma laughed too, "Hey, that's what I said," she shrugged.

"Hey, Em, can I ask you something?" Ruby asked seriously.

Emma nodded, "Of course, what's up?"

Ruby looked at her feet and back to the gym door, before she lent on the wall, "Do you think… I should just move on?"

Emma frowned, "You mean with Belle? You still like her?"

Ruby nodded, "I do. A lot. But I don't ever want to push her before she's ready, I mean I don't want to push her before she's over…" she shrugged.

Emma nodded, understanding, "Have you guys talked about it? I mean, since you broke up, have you talked about your feelings towards one another?"

Ruby's brow furrowed, "Well, a little but not much. I mean, we kinda left it at maybe one day. It's just… if there's no chance, I want to know so I can move on."

Emma swallowed hard, "Right, I get that… It's just, I don't think I can answer that, Rubes."

"Has she said anything to you?" Ruby persisted.

Emma closed her eyes, "No…she hasn't. I mean, I know she still cares about you and she's really glad we're all friends again, but I don't know…I don't know her feelings towards you, or me..." she trailed off for a minute before continuing, "Ruby, if you want a straight answer, you need to ask Belle."

"Ask me what?" Belle emerged from the changing rooms, still towelling her wet hair.

Ruby and Emma turned to see her and exchanged a glance.

"Um, I've got study to do anyway, I'll talk to you guys later," Emma stated.

Belle frowned, "Aren't we having lunch?"

Emma shrugged, "Come on, you know how much I've got to do, you guys go, we're doing dinner tomorrow anyway."

Ruby bit her tongue but nodded, making eye contact with Emma and knowing they were on the same page, "Okay, cool. Granny's?" she turned to Belle.

Belle shrugged, still confused, "Alright, sure, I guess," she hugged her friend quickly, "See you, Swan."

"See you," Emma smiled, returning the hug and trying to smile reassuringly at a nervous looking Ruby, before they turned and walked down the corridor.

* * *

"Hey, you, no, what have I told you about reading my markings?" Regina snapped as she saw the teenager poured over one of her essays for marking.

"Oh come on, it's just Belle's, she won't care," Emma shrugged.

Regina rolled her eyes, "That's not the point. I volunteer to do this extra marking so I can ask for favours at a later date, not so my sticky beak girlfriend can read her friends' work."

Emma rolled her eyes this time, "Here I was thinking you were doing it out of the goodness of your heart," she laughed.

Regina glared, "Oh shush, you. Who knows, maybe I can use those favours to both our advantage one day," she sat next to Emma on the couch, "But only if you're good," she put her hand out for the paper.

Emma sighed, "Oh come on, I'm nearly finished, it's really good," she whined.

Regina shook her head, "You think everything Belle writes is good, dear, you're a tad biased," she couldn't help smiling fondly at the blonde.

Emma shrugged, "That's cause it is," she stuck her tongue out immaturely, "You already know you're gonna give her full marks."

The brunette sighed, pushing a hand through her hair before snatching the paper out of Emma's hand, "Probably," she admitted in a mutter, ignoring the wide grin on the blonde's face, "Don't look so smug you, you're not in my good books right now," she half teased.

Emma bit her lip and crawled into the teachers lip, "Is that an invitation?" she mumbled into Regina's neck.

Regina closed her eyes; ugh, she thought, I totally asked for that, "No," she forced herself to push the teenager away, "It's not. Not now," she bit her lip, her eyes shining, "Later," she mumbled, turning back to Belle's paper, "Stop looking so smug," she growled again, rolling her eyes as Emma cackled loudly, seeing the effect her actions were having on the older woman.


	22. Going Slowly

Chapter 22.

Belle frowned at her friend as they slid into a booth at Granny's, "So… ask me what?" she repeated.

Ruby sighed, looking away, "It was…nothing," she muttered.

"Ruby, come on, tell me," Belle persisted.

Ruby looked at her friend; she didn't get nervous often but she was worried. More than anything, she didn't want to scare Belle off.

"Ruby?" Belle interrupted her friends' thoughts.

Ruby unclenched her jaw, "I just… ," she hesitated, "I guess… I want to know if there's a chance for us…to be more than friends. I mean, I'm not saying right now, I just mean at all, because I still really, really like you but I need to know if there's no chance so I can move on and stop pining…well, not pining but – "

"Yes," Belle answered, interrupting Ruby's sudden rant, "I really, really like you too, Ruby. And I want to try again. I really do."

Ruby nodded slowly, "What about Emma?" she asked quietly.

Belle sighed, biting her tongue a moment, "I guess… I needed to tell her how I felt so that I could move on. She's my best friend, Ruby, and she will always be in my life, I'm never going to compromise that but we're not meant to be together," she shrugged, "I'm just sorry I went about things the way I did, it was stupid and reckless. I guess I held in my feelings too long and then…" she trailed off, "I mean, it's not an excuse," she shook her head, "But, I tried to get over you too when we broke up, but I couldn't. I don't think I want to."

Ruby couldn't help smiling at the feeling that swelled inside her chest, "Really? I mean, great. Like I said, no rush or anything, I don't want to push – "

"What if I want to rush?" Belle asked quietly, "I've really missed you Rubes. I don't want to waste any more time."

Ruby frowned, "Are you sure?"

Belle smiled and reached across the table, taking her friends' hand in her own, "Positive."

Ruby nodded, her face breaking out into a group, "I've missed you too. You wanna, uh, get take away and go back to my place? Watch a movie? Reconnect?"

Belle giggled, "Is that what the kids are calling it? But yes…reconnecting sounds nice," she smiled, eyes shining.

* * *

"I've been thinking…" Emma started before pausing and getting lost in thought.

"What is it, dear?" Regina asked, putting her arm around her girlfriend as they sat on the couch.

Emma sighed, shrugging.

Regina frowned, "Tell me what you're thinking," she said quietly.

"Well, I don't know," Emma started again, "I mean, things have been good lately. I've felt pretty good and I caught up in school. My friends are good, you're…amazing," she bit her lip and smiled, "But… it's just, you know some people wait their whole lives to resolve things from their childhood? They get to like fifty and they're still bitter and they can look back on their lives and relate everything to that one thing and wonder how different things could have been if they'd just dealt with…whatever it is that held them back for so long."

Regina nodded slowly, "Of course, some people take longer than others to deal with their issues…but it's very individual, some people might not be ready to face their past until a lot later in life."

Emma nodded, "I guess… But, well, I think I'm ready."

Regina remained calm, though unconsciously squeezed the teenagers shoulder gently, "What do you want to do, honey?"

"I want to tell my doctor…about the abuse, I guess. And I want to know why I am the way I am," she shrugged, "I don't want it to hang over me anymore. I don't want to be angry all the time and sabotage relationships with my friends. And, I mean, I love feeling safe with you, but I want to feel safe other places too."

The brunette nodded, leaning forward and removing her arm from the teenagers shoulder to take her hands in her own, "You're very brave, honey. You know I will support you in any way I can, and I know your friends will too," she smiled, squeezing the hands she held.

Emma nodded, "I know, I'm so lucky to have you," she mumbled, staring at their entwined hands.

Regina smiled quickly before asking, "When you say…you want to feel safe other places, may I ask, what do you mean by that exactly? Do you not feel safe with your friends? What about at school?"

Emma nibbled on her lip for a moment, "I feel safe with you, obviously, and with Belle too. Even with Ruby most of the time… And here, this house, feels safe mostly. But I guess, what I mean is, like…I just always feel on edge, vigilant I suppose. Some places are worse than others; school isn't so bad because I know you're not far away and same with Belle. I don't like being here alone though," she looked around the house, "It's stupid, I guess, but I just don't feel safe. I really don't like doctors' surgeries, I don't know why, I guess I hear too many myths about sleazy doctors and my mind runs wild."

Regina looked thoughtful as she nodded, "Are you scared someone will hurt you? Is that what invokes this fear?"

Emma shrugged, "Sometimes. I know it's irrational though, but that doesn't stop the anxiety. My imagination is too good sometimes. As soon as I think something, it turns into a whole scenario and I can convince myself something bad will happen…" she shrugged again.

"Hmm," Regina hummed, "It makes sense, dear, really it does. As a child, you were in a situation you thought was meant to be safe…and you got hurt… it makes sense that you don't know when you're really safe… Is there anywhere other than here that you feel safe?"

Emma thought for a moment, "In mine and Belle's treehouse. We don't go there so much now, but that used to be the only time I felt safe, when we went there and read, or she would read to me. I could relax and let my mind wander, but it wasn't in a scary way, it was peaceful."

Regina smiled warmly, "You two are very lucky to have found each other, you know. I don't think I've ever encountered anyone with as strong a connection as you and Belle seem to have, it really is quite special."

Emma bit back a smile, "She was the first person I ever considered my family," she said quietly, "And for a long time, I thought she might be the only one I ever did."

Regina wrapped her arms around the teenager, pulling her close, "I will always be your family, Emma," she murmured.

Emma nuzzled into her neck, breathing in her perfume, "I know," she whispered, "But I'm scared. I've never spoken about it, not to a professional…I…I'm scared."

"That's completely understandable," Regina said soothingly, "You know, if it's too hard for you to verbalise, at least at first, maybe you could write something down instead? You could show that to your doctor," she shrugged, "I don't know, it's just a thought."

Emma nodded, "It's a good one, maybe I should try that. I'm a better writer than I am speaker."

Regina smiled, "I am so proud of you," she whispered, cupping the teenagers cheek in her hand, "I don't think you have any idea how wise and brave you are."

Emma swallowed hard, "Thank you," she mumbled, "I love you."

"Oh, and I love you, dear, so very much. Every day, you amaze me, you are always teaching me something new."

Emma smiled, "Role reversal," she teased softly.

Regina chuckled, "Does this mean I get to be the rebellious teenager?"

"Nah ah," Emma shook her head, "I like it like this," she leant her head against Regina's chest, "It's as close to perfect as can be," she finished, letting her eyes close.

* * *

"Hey, hey look who got some muscles," Ruby teased as her hands traced Belle's arms.

Belle blushed, "Oh, shut up, I do not," she protested.

Ruby laughed, "Do too," she replied softly.

Belle frowned skeptically, "Really? I don't think so, not like Emma's, hers are so prominent."

Ruby rolled her eyes, "No, not like Emma's, but I can feel them, it just takes a while for them to build, you know that."

Belle nodded, "Uh-huh."

"Anyway, it's dead cute," Ruby smiled, "Sexy, too," she murmured, moving her lips just centimetres from Belle's.

They stayed in that position a few seconds before Belle pressed her lips to her Ruby's and put a soft hand on her cheek as the kiss deepened, Ruby gently moving her tongue into the other woman's mouth, circling the other woman's slowly until Belle pushed back just as passionately, their tongue's dancing in the middle. Eventually, the two pulled apart, breath ragged as Belle's hand slipped to Ruby's jaw, running a thumb along it.

Belle licked her lips as she panted, "I missed that taste," she murmured.

Ruby grinned through her own laboured breathing, "I missed it too, Belle," she replied quietly, "I wonder if you know how amazing you are," she bit her lip, blinking slowly as she stared at the girl in front of her.

Belle's cheeks burnt, "I think maybe you have me on a pedestal, Rubes," she said.

Ruby's eyes squinted, "Maybe," she shrugged, "But I don't care. You're not like anyone else I've ever met. I could travel the world and never find someone who feels so deeply, reads so intensely, is so curious, someone who smiles so brightly, whose energy is enough to reach into the very heart's of the people she loves…someone who spends her life admiring the heroes in her books when she doesn't even realise that she's the real hero," she finished quietly.

Belle's throat constricted and her eyes were wide as she took Ruby's hands in her own, "Ruby…" she was lost for words, "Thank you," she simply said, a tear rolling down her cheek, "I don't even know what to say. I – I think you put on this tough act sometimes, but in your heart," she moved her hand to Ruby's chest, feeling that heart beat under her fingertips, "you're a pure romantic," she smiled, "A total sweetheart. I'm so lucky to even know you, let alone be with you."

Ruby sighed as she smiled and pulled the smaller brunette into her arms; she knew she'd missed Belle, but perhaps hadn't realised quite how much until she held her in her arms again like this, resting her cheek in soft hair as she closed her eyes.

* * *

"Mm, hey sleepy."

Emma groaned as the warm breath tickled her ear, "Is it that time already?"

Regina threw her arms around her lover's stomach, resting her chin on her shoulder, "I'm afraid it is, dear. School, work beckons us."

Emma groaned again, "Why don't they start school later in the day?" she grumbled.

Regina chuckled softly, "I don't know, dear, but they don't."

Emma squirmed and turned around to face the schoolteacher, "Well, you're a teacher, you should know."

Regina laughed, "I didn't make the rules, silly."

Emma yawned, "Well, you should tell them to change them. Teenagers don't like getting up so early. Maybe they wouldn't give so much attitude to teachers if we started later in the day."

Regina smiled, shaking her head, "I bet you would be just as much a rebel as you are now," she teased gently, "Anyway, you only have a month left of senior year, then you can sleep all you'd like."

Emma rolled her eyes, "I doubt it. I bet community college have stupid, early classes too."

The brunette rolled her eyes, "Hmm," she hummed, "You should find out this the scores you need to get in this week. Are you excited?"

Emma bit down on her lip, "I don't know… I probably won't even get in, my marks are…" she shrugged.

Regina sighed, "Honey, how many times must I tell you? You're smart. Even without trying, you've been scoring above average, you'll be fine to get into community college."

Emma shrugged before nodding silently.

Regina watched her carefully, "Emma, I know it's not Columbia… but it's a start. It's just for now."

Emma nodded, "Yeah, I know. I mean, Belle worked so hard to get into Columbia, early acceptance and she'll probably get a scholarship too… I should be in the same boat, I should have studied, I should have – "

Regina placed her hands on the teenagers shoulders, "Hey, hey," she spoke softly, "You have dealt with so much this year, honey, life is not measured by academia, you know that," she paused as Emma nodded reluctantly, "Besides, at least now you get to stay here; you and Ruby may even get to go to school together and Belle will still be here. It will be make the transition that little bit easier. Columbia can still happen…or not," she shrugged, "Whatever you decide."

Emma nodded, "I guess so… I mean, I know. I just have to stop thinking about the future too much, I mean three, four years is too much right now, I know that. I have to take things slowly," she sat up, "But this morning has been slow enough, I should go shower," she paused, "Hm, no," she thought, "We should go shower."

Regina laughed as Emma rolled out of bed and followed behind her to the bathroom.


End file.
